robert paul reyes

Stray Dog Adopted as Newest Friar by Bolivian Monastery

 

“A Franciscan monastery in Bolivia adopted a stray dog and allowed it to join its ranks as the newest friar.

Proyecto Narices Frias (Cold Nose Project) shared photos of the dog, who was given the title Friar Bigoton or Friar Moustache, dressed in traditional robes alongside his fellow friars at the monastery in Cochabamba.

The group hopes Friar Bigoton`s story will encourage other people to adopt stray dogs.

UPI

What a wonderful example this Franciscan monastery in providing for all churches, a house of worship should minister to all members of their community, including stray pets.

The Franciscan order takes its name after St. Francis of Assisi, the patron saint of animals, this monastery is living up to the legacy of its founder.

Every church, Catholic and Protestant, should adopt a stray dog or cat as its official mascot. There is no better way for a church to welcome a stranger than having a pooch greet them at the vestibule.

I`d rather receive a sloppy wet kiss from a canine, than have a priest sprinkle me with holy water.

I`d feel comfortable at any church where a humble pooch is accepted as part of its faith community.

Pics of pooch:

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/03/08/Stray-dog-adopted-as-newest-friar-by-Bolivian-monastery/6651488995735/?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=3

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Little Fart Farts on Weatherman on Live TV: Video

“Patrick Ellis was delivering the weather forecast Saturday for WLBT-TV when a young boy ran into the camera frame.

`Are you sure?! Are you crazy sure?!` the boy asked as Ellis gave the weather.
The young boy ran over to Ellis and lifted a leg to mime the act of passing gas on the weatherman.

Ellis, somewhat flustered, asked if the boy wanted to deliver the weather forecast.
`Yeah, there are farts everywhere and toots, and they are crazy,` the boy said, right before being dragged off-screen by an adult.”

UPI

I`ve yelled “Are you sure?” at the TV screen dozens of times when a meteorologist has predicted rain when there wasn`t a cloud in the sky or forecast snow when the temperature was well above freezing.

It doesn`t surprise me that a young kid had the temerity to question a weatherman to his face, but miming the act of farting on live TV is certainly a novel way to express his skepticism.

The kids` forecast of farts and toots everywhere is probably more accurate than whatever the weatherman predicted.

The little fart was dragged off-screen by an adult, I would have dragged the weather dude off-screen.

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=myjN5Rb_n94

Google Chrome Extension ‘Nope’ Wards Off Coworkers with Fake Phone Call

“A new Google Chrome browser extension called `Nope` aims to help users escape from a common workplace annoyance — conversations with coworkers.

The Nope extension features a button at the top of the user`s browser that they can click when approached by a coworker serving up some annoying conversation.

`Press this button to send a call to your phone. Apologize sincerely as you pick it up. Then watch them walk away,` the extension`s description reads.”

UPI

I don`t consider myself a misanthrope, but every night I pray that CERN will unleash a baby black hole that will swallow the Earth.

I don`t like small talk, and I cringe with horror and dread whenever a coworker approaches my desk. I`ve considered putting up a “FUC* OFF” sign on my desk, but the namby pambies at Human Resources would probably object.

“Nope” is a lifesaver, now I can stop my coworkers dead in their tracks before they have a change to annoy me with the following things:

Pester me to buy Girl Scout cookies.

Bore me with the latest news about their cat.

Show me pics of newborn baby that looks like a red-faced demon.

Beg me to help with their project. (The only project I care about is finishing a Facebook quiz.)

Do I care about any of these things? NOPE! God bless this new Google Chrome browser extension.

Read More:

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/03/08/Chrome-extension-Nope-wards-off-coworkers-with-fake-phone-call/4411488981789/?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=1

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Stephen King Trolls Donald Trump with Twitter Horror Story

“After President Donald Trump took to Twitter Saturday to accuse Barack Obama of wiretapping Trump Tower during the 2016 election, Stephen King trolled POTUS by sharing his latest horror story.

In a series of three tweets, the author penned a short thriller mocking the allegations, seeming to ridicule the fact that Trump provided no evidence backing up his claims. `Not only did Obama tap Trump`s phones, he stole the strawberry ice cream out of the mess locker,` King wrote. `Obama tapped Trump`s phones IN PERSON! Went in wearing a Con Ed coverall. Michelle stood guard while O spliced the lines. SAD!`

But it was the twist ending that really took the cake: Trump should know OBAMA NEVER LEFT THE WHITE HOUSE! He`s in the closet! HE HAS SCISSORS!”

Time Magazine

Not even the twisted mind of Stephen King could conceive of a reality more chilling than Donald Trump accompanied by a military aide carrying a briefcase with launch codes for nuclear weapons.

Leave it to the master of horror fiction to satirize Trump`s delusional paranoid mind by turning his tweets into a horror scenario.

I just hope King hasn`t further inflamed Trump`s inferiority complex by reminding him that he can never escape Obama`s legacy (such as it is). Indeed Obama`s shadow follows Trump wherever he ventures inside the White House.

Size does matter, and a literal pissing contest between Trump and Obama would be like Obama fighting a blaze with a water hose, and Trump brandishing a water gun in his pathetic little hand.

Trump is attempting to burnish his reputation by defaming Obama. SAD! Trump`s Twitter rants are indicative of a petty and sick mind. SAD! The American people elected this Oompa Loompa Clown. PATHETIC.

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An Angry Donald Trump is Out of Control!

“Here’s how The Washington Post described President Trump’s mood heading into this past weekend: Trump was mad — steaming, raging mad.

And here’s ABC News: President Donald Trump summoned some of his senior staff to the Oval Office and went ‘ballistic.’

The president, it seems fair to say, wasn’t happy then on Saturday morning when he sent a flurry of tweets alleging — with zero evidence — that Trump Tower had been wiretapped in the course of the 2016 campaign under orders from then-President Barack Obama. Anger — and a persistent sense that people were out to get him or weren’t treating him fairly — motivated Trump to make a massive charge: That the man he was running to replace purposely sought to sway the election via misuse of the intelligence community.”

The Washington Post


Trump was livid that Attorney General Jeff Sessions recused himself on Thursday from any investigation into charges that Russia meddled in the 2016 presidential election, only hours after he declared that he saw no need for his Attorney General to recuse himself.

Trump felt that Sessions made him appear weak and ineffectual and he took out his explosive anger on those closet to him, his hapless staff. I would love to see video of Trump`s blistering attack on his handlers; I can imagine his wig flipping, his tiny hands gesticulating, hot air emanating from his mouth, and wet farts from his ass.

His seething anger hadn`t dissipated by Saturday morning, so he let loose with toxic tweets accusing former President Barack Obama of wiretapping Trump Tower in the course of the 2016 presidential campaign.

Needless to say, Trump doesn`t have a shred of proof to back up his mind blowing accusation. Trump`s preposterous allegation has been denied by a spokesperson for Obama, former DNI Director James Clapper, and by just about everyone else who isn`t connected with the Trump regime.

Trump`s anger was humorous in the debates when he was cutting down “Little Marco,” Lyin` Ted Cruz,” and “Low-energy Jeb Bush,” but his out of control temper is terrifying now that he`s the Leader of the Free World.

What if the dictator of North Korea tweets that Trump`s belligerent tone towards his country is compensation for his tiny pecker? Will Trump respond by nuking the Hermit Kingdom?

If Trump blows off steam by having an affair with a White House intern, I hope to God that the press doesn`t report on the scandal. If Trump finds a way to blow off steam, other than tweeting, we should be grateful.

Trump for the love of God please have an affair, or hire Snoop Dogg as your aide, and chill with him smoking some Chronic.

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/03/06/the-dangerous-anger-of-donald-trump/?utm_term=.a0ede7147cb6

Adorable Kitten Stuck in Bag: Video

“An adorable kitten who became over-excited at his owner`s birthday party was caught on camera SWAN DIVING into a slim gift bag in a bid to retrieve a toy – only to become stuck.”

 Daily Mail

Cats are cool characters, you could be suffering a massive heart attack, and they would barely glance in your direction, while they continue to groom themselves.

But even the coolest cat will go bonkers when he sees a bag or a box, and a bag doesn`t need to have a toy or a treat inside to entice a feline to dive into it.

This adorable kitten looks anything but cool stuck inside a gift bag, my cats have been in this predicament dozens of times. Be careful not to leave any plastic bags lying around, your fluffy friend can easily suffocate in a plastic bag.

There are many bag-loving kittens waiting for a forever home in your local animal shelter.

Link to video: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4285746/Adorable-cat-swan-dives-gift-bag-retrieve-toy.html#ixzz4aaYUndEv

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Monster Alligator Struts Across Florida Golf Course: Video

“A large alligator strutted across a Florida golf course proudly carrying an almost equally large fish in its mouth.

Norma Respess captured footage of the gator and its massive trophy as it made its way across a walkway at Seven Springs Golf and County Club in Trinity.”
UPI

When a monster gator nonchalantly strolls across a Florida golf course proudly carrying a large fish in its mouth, nobody bats an eye. Pardon the pun, but alligators on a Florida golf course are par for the course. In fact I wouldn`t be surprised if there are “Alligators have the right of way” signs posted throughout the Seven Springs Golf and Country Club.

In Australia I`m sure it`s not unusual to see a dingo carrying a fat toddler in his mouth on a golf course, and it`s Hollywood nobody will think it odd if a celebrity is boinking a fat bimbo to celebrate a win on the 18th hole.

Dog bites man: Not a story

Alligator strutting across Florida golf course: Not a story

If an alligator beats Tiger Woods playing golf: Story! Then again maybe not, even an alligator with a bad gold handicap could probably beat Woods.

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Donald Trump and the Press Must Call a Truce

Donald Trump has been president for less than two months, but it seems like two years. Every day, if not every hour, of the Trump administration brings a new senseless Twitter attack, overreaching executive order, or poorly planned policy initiative.

The Russia controversy is a cancer that is quickly metastasizing, claiming another official of the nascent administration in almost every news cycle. The Russian connection may not bring down the Trump presidency, but it`s crippling his agenda.

The president is mired in historically low approval ratings, and his only recourse is to demonize an entity, the press, that has an even more dismal approval rating.

Trump and the press are engaged in trench warfare, every new engagement between these implacable foes only serves to diminish the reputation of both of them.

Both parties of this conflict have gone nuclear: Fake news vs incoherent rants and peeves.

The bloody Korean War ended with an armistice, not a peace treaty. Donald Trump and the media aren`t going to be singing Kumbaya anytime soon, but for the sake of our democracy, if not our sanity, I implore them to call a truce. This interminable sniping between the Trump administration and the press must stop.

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Dude Dies Under His Six-ton Collection of Adult Magazines

“A lonely Japanese man who amassed more than six tons of porn died when a huge pile of magazines fell on top of him. And even more tragically, the man`s body was only discovered six months later when the landlord entered the flat to find out why the rent had not been paid.

The man`s lowly death was revealed by a member of the cleaning team, who said his company had been hired to remove the magazines discreetly in a way that would not be noticed by neighbours and the man`s family to save them from the shame.”

Daily Mail

This article brings up a lot of questions:

Is the phrase “lonely Japanese man” redundant?

Hardcore porn videos are available online for free, why would anyone buy porn magazines? This individual must have been keeping the porn magazine industry alive all by himself.

What kind of landlord waits six months to find out why his tenant hasn`t been paying his rent? When I was a tenant if I was six days late, my landlord would be banging on my door demanding his money.

Why didn`t the floor collapse under the weight of six tons of dirty mags?

How the hell do you remove six tons of adult magazines from a house discreetly? Did the cleaning crew wrap each magazine in a brown paper?

Didn`t this wanker have a girlfriend, boyfriend or significant other that cared enough about him to come by and check on him? Rhetorical question, anybody who buys 6 tons of pornographic magazines doesn`t have any friends, let alone lovers.

What were this loser`s last words?

But God, I only bought the magazines for the articles.

The weight of my porn addiction is too much to bear.

Read More:

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-4278524/Man-dies-six-ton-pile-porn-magazines.html

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Parents Outraged When Teacher Plays With Ouija Board with Kindergarten Students

“An outraged mother is calling on Milwaukee Public Schools officials to fire a kindergarten teacher who introduced the young students in her class to a Ouija board.

The mom, who asked to not be publicly named, said the game was used on Friday in her 5-year-old`s classroom at Zablocki Elementary.

In an email to the mother, the teacher said the Ouija board had been in the classroom since Halloween.

`The kids have been asking for a scary story and I got the board and moved the paper clip to answer some of their questions. They asked about scary characters in movies. I did not say there were spirits. It was all done in fun. I understand your concern. It was silly and I`m sorry. I will take the board home and this won`t happen again,` the teacher said.”

WISN

If this teacher had brought in a Bible and answered any questions the students had from Scripture, he would have been summarily fired.

I`m a strong believer in the separation of church and state, and no religion has any place in a government school. Most of us consider a Ouija board a harmless toy, but some oculists use it to conjure spirits. It`s irrelevant if you`re able to summon a demon with a Ouija board, just as it`s irrelevant if the Christian deity responds to school prayers uttered in the name of Jesus.

The teacher must have been aware that evangelical Christians consider the Ouija board a tool of the devil that can lead to demonic possession, was he deliberately attempting to provoke fundamentalists? In any event school should be a religion-free zone, and the teacher should be suspended.

An Ouija board should never be brought to school, not even on Halloween, just like a Bible should never be brought to school, not even during the Christmas season.

Read More:

http://www.wisn.com/article/mom-wants-teacher-fired-for-using-ouija-board-with-kindergarten-students/8988879

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Fetus Captured on Ultrasound Flashing Sign of the Horns! Antichrist?

“A Utah couple are preparing to welcome what might be the state`s most metal baby after an ultrasound image captured the fetus flashing the sign of the horns.

Makelle and Jared Ahlin of Santaquin said they were looking at ultrasound images of the fetus, whose sex is as of yet known, when they noticed the baby had the fingers on one hand arranged in the sign of the horns, a gesture commonly associated with rock `n` roll, particularly heavy metal.“

UPI
The couple was so enraptured by the image that they posted in on Facebook, the funky fetus is now a star on the Internet.

I`m glad mom and dad aren`t born again Christians, or else the baby might be welcomed into the world by an exorcist instead of a pediatrician.

What would you do if an ultrasound image revealed that your unborn child was flashing the sign of the devil? Would you prepare to baptize him in holy water as soon as he was born, or would you stock up on Mettalica onesies for your little rocker?

Rock on little dude! Rock on!

Read More: http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/03/01/Utah-parents-share-ultrasound-picture-of-heavy-metal-fetus/2351488377644/

Chelsea Clinton is the Most Repulsive Potential 2020 Democratic Presidential Candidate

Despite two humiliating losses for Hillary Clinton, in 2008 she lost to a political neophyte with a Muslim name, and in 2016 to a racist clown, Democratic elites are determined to keep the Clinton dynasty alive.

Bill and Hillary didn`t have any offspring, but Hillary and Webster Hubbell had one daughter, Chelsea Clinton. Unfortunately, Chelsea has all the physical attractiveness and charisma of her toad-looking baby daddy, which is zilch.

But that hasn`t stopped the liberal elites from promoting Chelsea as the Second Coming of Bill Clinton. If Chelsea possessed even a fraction of the charm and charisma of Bill she would be a viable candidate, but she doesn`t have the allure to elicit a cat call from a crackhead homeless person.

Chelsea is physically repulsive, she doesn`t know how to work a crowd, she`s the most unnatural politician since her mother. Even with the financial backing of the one percent, she couldn`t be elected dog catcher in New York City.

The Democratic Party should stop trying to foist this abomination on us — can you imagine what Donald Trump would do to Chelsea if she ran against him in 2020? He would grab her by the pussy, bitch slap her, command her to spray orange tan on his face, and he would win in an electoral college and popular vote landslide!

The Democrats need to get it through their thick heads that the Clinton brand is dead beyond salvation. The Democratic Party desperately needs an infusion of new blood.

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Outrage: Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg Skips Donald Trump’s Speech

Not only did Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg never miss a speech that President Barack Obama delivered to Congress, but she always hugged him.

Ginsburg made her loathing for Donald Trump clear before he was elected president, during the heated campaign she called him a “faker.”

Chief Justice John Roberts, and Justices Anthony Kennedy, Stephen Breyer, Sonia Sotomayor and Elena Kagan attended Trump`s address to Congress last night. Justices Clarence Thomas and Samuel Alito weren`t in attendance, continuing their past practice.

Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg was notably absent from President Donald Trump`s first address to a joint session of Congress, shame on the hideous little gnome.

Justice Ginsburg is making a mockery of the principle that the Supreme Court is above politics, her love of the constitution and justice should exceed her hatred and disdain of Trump, and she should have dragged her skeletal butt to Congress to hear Trump`s speech.

Trump isn`t an easy man to like, his clownish Oompa Loompa appearance is matched by his petty and vulgar character. But he`s exceedingly blessed that his primary female detractors (Nancy Pelosi, Hillary Clinton, Lena Dunham, Leslie Jones, Rosie O`Donnell, Elizabeth Warren, and Ruth Bader Ginsburg) are the most physically and morally repulsive creatures on the face of the Earth.

Hopefully, the Grim Reaper will drag Ginsburg to hell before she has another opportunity to embarrass herself and disrespect the president by skipping another presidential address.
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Outrage: Kellyanne Conway Disses Black Leaders in the Oval Office!

“Social media erupted Monday night after Kellyanne Conway, a White House senior adviser, was pictured kneeling on the Oval Office couch to snap a photo of President Trump with leaders of the nation`s historically black colleges and universities.”

USA Today

If Donald Trump`s young son Barron was in the Oval Office while his father was meeting dignitaries he would have the decorum, manners and respect to sit up straight.

Kellyanne Conway was casually sitting with her knees tucked under her on the couch, playing with her phone, while Trump met with leaders from historically black colleges and universities.

Conway`s lackadaisical posture was an insult to her boss, and and affront to the black educators. If Trump met with white leaders from community colleges and vocational schools, Conway would have been sitting like a proper lady, not like a wanton floozy.

A picture is worth a thousand words, and this image speaks volumes about Conway`s white privilege and disdain for black leaders.

I`m sure Conway believes that she deserves credit for not diddling with a dildo while Trump was meeting with the distinguished African American leaders.

Unlike the Bowling Green Massacre this is a real news item, and Conway should be summarily fired by the president of the United States.

Pic of Conway siting like a slut in the Oval Office:

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/onpolitics/2017/02/28/kellyanne-conway-couch-oval-office-white-house/98510306/

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Why Doesn’t Donald Trump Condemn Hate Crimes?

“An Olathe man who reportedly told two strangers – Garmin engineers originally from India – to `get out of my country` before he shot them in an Olathe bar was charged Thursday with first-degree murder in the death of one of the victims.

Adam W. Purinton, 51, allegedly shot Srinivas Kuchibhotla, 32; Alok Madasani, 32, of Overland Park, and another bar patron, 24-year-old Ian Grillot of Grandview.

At least one witness reportedly heard the man yell `get out of my country` shortly before shooting Kuchibhotla and Madasani. The man fled on foot. A manhunt ensued. Five hours later, Purinton reportedly told a bartender at a bar in an Applebee`s in Clinton, Mo., that he needed a place to hide out because he had just killed two Middle Eastern men, The Star has learned.

The bartender called police, and Purinton was arrested without incident, Assistant Clinton Police Chief Sonny Lynch said. Purinton was not armed.”

KansasCity.Com

Donald Trump has a notoriously thin skin, at any perceived slight he retaliates immediately on Twitter with an onslaught of venom. But when there`s an act of outrage perpetrated against Muslims, Jews, or immigrants, not a word of protest from the president of the United States.

Trump is being derelict in his duties, he`s the president of all Americans, and as consoler-in-chief it`s incumbent upon him to speak out against acts of violence against minorities.

Trump`s silence in the face of a murder of an Indian immigrant isn`t an aberration, Trump has a well-established pattern of failing to speak out against hate crimes.

For weeks Trump remained silent after a rash of vandalism against Jewish Community Centers and cemeteries, even when prodded to condemn these crimes by journalists. It wasn`t until last week that Trump finally unequivocally condemned these vicious acts of antisemitism.

To my knowledge Trump has yet to condemn the arson of several mosques. Whenever any house of worship is vandalized or destroyed it`s a crime against democracy and religion in general, and American of all faiths, and atheists should denounce these hate crimes.

Any president, especially one who been criticized for years for his insensitivity towards minorities, should decry all hate crimes. Trump`s silence speaks volumes about his racism.

If I were an opinion writer for the New York Times, instead of an unknown blogger, Trump would be tweeting his fool head off denouncing this article as fake news.

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How to Cure Donald Trump of His Tweeting Addiction

Donald Trump is a liar. Period. End of story. He is a compulsive and pathological liar, he wouldn`t know the truth if it grabbed him by the groin.

Here`s a list of 99 lies Trump has told just since he`s been president:

https://www.thestar.com/news/world/2017/02/24/daniel-dales-donald-trump-fact-check-updates.html

Trump has told some whoopers, and folks think his most glaring deception was when he waved his baby hands at the debate audience and declared there was nothing wrong with the size of his manhood.

Methinks his biggest falsehood was when he told Fox & Friends two days before his presidential inauguration: Look, I don`t like tweeting! That`s like Snoop Dogg declaring: Look, I don`t like smoking weed.

Trump loves to tweet, he`s addicted to Twitter, and he needs an intervention. Mr. T, Dr. Phil and Steve Bannon should pounce on him when he attempts to tweet at an ungodly hour of the morning, and take away his phone.

Trump will need something else for his demonically diminutive hands to play with. We all know how he loves to grab them by the pussy; his handlers could give him Taylor Swift`s pussy . . . cat to play with. The pop star owns several felines, and she might donate on for the sake of national security. One inappropriate tweet and Trump could start World War III, but if he handles Swift`s pussy inappropriately, the only damage will be scratches to his baby hands.

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Two Snuggie-clad Goats Terrorize Idaho Town

“A pair of goats dressed in snuggies were found roaming around an Idaho town unattended.

Nampa Police Department shared a photo of an Animal Control Officer holding the two escaped animals, each donning its own blue snuggie, in hopes of tracking down their owner.”

UPI

A goat is a universal symbol for evil, Baphomet the Sabbatic Goat has been striking fear in the hearts of men for thousands of years.

I wouldn`t be surprised to see a pair of goats in the backyard of an Illuminati witch like Beyoncé or Lady Gaga, but two Snuggie-clad goats wandering around in an Idaho town scares the Bejesus out of me.

Cops managed to track down the owners, who weren`t identified, but I bet they belonged to a satanic cult.

I don`t give the devil an inch for fear he`ll steal my soul, therefore you will never catch me wearing a Snuggie or petting a goat at a petting zoo.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Witches Mobilize to Cast a Binding Spell on President Trump

“Donald Trump`s presidency has cast a pall over the nation, so now witches are casting a spell against him.

A document making its rounds among the witch community is asking people who practice the craft to perform a monthly binding ritual until the president is removed from office.

In order to work, the mass spell must be performed at midnight EST on every waning crescent moon.

The first one is happening on Friday and will be followed by similar spell cast events on March 26, April 24 and May 23 and beyond.”

Huffington Post

Donald Trump is enthralled and delighted by this mass spell witches are casting against him, nothing will unite and energize his core supporters more than knowing that they are under attack by a coven of witches straight outta hell.

Trump`s supporters crap on nuance and subtlety, they perceive everything in black and white terms, they don`t see these witches as members of an alternative religious community or as performance artists, but as emissaries of Satan hellbound on destroying their Messiah, Trump.

Millions of feminists and lesbians turned out in droves to support a real witch, Hillary Clinton, and she still lost to an Oompa Loompa from hell. Instead of casting ineffectual spells these witches should focus their efforts on voter registration drives so that Trump can be cast out of office in 2020.

Read More:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/donald-trump-spell-cast_us_58af3de7e4b0780bac27692a

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The President of Iceland Wants to Ban Pineapple Pizza! God Bless Him!

“The food world is riddled with heated debates, and one of the most polarizing fights centers around pineapple on pizza.

This week Iceland`s President Guðni Th. Jóhannesson let us know where he stands.

After taking questions from students at a high school in North Iceland, one bold pupil asked Johannesson what he thought about pineapple as a pizza topping.

The president held nothing back expressing his disdain for the pairing. He also said if he had the power to pass laws, he`d ban it across the land.”

CNN

Nobody can find Iceland on a map, and nobody cares what transpires in the island nation, but when Iceland`s President (ceremonial post with no power) declared that he would ban pizza if he could pass laws, suddenly everybody was googling “Iceland” and “President Johannesson.”

I would trust a politician with the wisdom and discernment to ban pizza implicitly, Congress wouldn`t dare oppose any of his executive orders.

I love me some pizza, and it`s not unusual for me to devour an entire pizza by myself, in one sitting. But if a Philistine offers me a slice of pizza with pineapple, I will beat him to within an inch of his life.

Pizza with pineapple is a culinary abomination, and an affront to the Almighty. Period. End of story.

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Outrage: Danish Man Charged With Blasphemy for Burning Koran

“A Danish man who posed a video of himself setting fire to the Quran on Facebook has been charged with blasphemy in the first such prosecution for 46 years.

The 42-year-old suspect put the clip, entitled `Consider your neighbour: it stinks when it burns` to a group called YES TO FREEDOM – NO TO ISLAM in December 2015.
Jan Reckendorff, from the public prosecutor`s office in Viborg, said: It is the prosecution`s view that circumstances involving the burning of holy books such as the Bible and the Quran can in some cases be a violation of the blasphemy clause, which covers public scorn or mockery of religion.”

Independent

If an individual was charged with blasphemy by a Western government for setting a Bible on fire the backlash would be intense and immediate. The hashtags #burnthefuckingbible and #separationofchurchandstate would be trending on Twitter, and there would be mass protests in every major Western city.

That said, burning the Koran is an incendiary act (pun intended) that only serves to sow discord and violence. Religion shouldn`t be exempt from criticism and ridicule, but burning the Koran doesn`t bring to light the excesses of Islam, it only exposes the stupidity of the person burning the holy book.

The Koran is treated with reverence by Muslims and any act of desecration of the holy book is perceived as a grave insult worthy of the death penalty. In a democratic country non-Muslims shouldn`t be bound by the prohibitions of Islam. I would never burn a copy of the Koran as a protest against the Neanderthal mindset of Islam, but if I performed such a foolish act it would be constitutionally-protected free speech.

I have written dozens of articles criticizing the abhorrent treatment of women and religious minorities in Muslim countries like Saudi Arabia and Iran, the written word is the best way to fight intolerance and religious fanaticism.

By the way, I have also written dozes of articles criticizing the homophobia and sexism of evangelicals, although I`m not drawing a moral equivalency between the two major religions. When Islam is criticized or mocked too many Muslims react violently, whereas when Catholics or evangelicals are attacked, they write a letter to the editor or post a rebuttal on their blogs.

In a secular democracy whenever we hear hate speech citizens must condemn it in no uncertain terms, but it`s anathema for the government to punish free speech. Denmark is a parliamentary constitutional monarchy, not a theocracy, for God`s sake.

Read More:
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/europe/denmark-man-burned-quran-koran-video-blasphemy-facebook-islam-prosecuted-charged-46-years-a7594796.html

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Donald Trump Raised More in Small-dollar Donations Than Bernie, Hillary and Obama

“Donald Trump, who spent more of his own money on his campaign than any other presidential candidate in history, also raised more in small-dollar donations than anyone else ever did.

Trump brought in $239 million in donations of $200 or less, more than Democrats Hillary Clinton and Bernie Sanders combined, according to the Campaign Finance Institute, a Washington-based research group.
He also proved more adept at raking in small-dollar contributions than Barack Obama, who brought in $219 million in 2012 and $189 million in 2008. Clinton raised $137 million and Sanders $100 million in donations of $200 or less.”

NJ.Com

Donald Trump didn`t buy the election, he invested a tiny fraction of his enormous wealth into his campaign. Putin`s hackers didn`t tilt the election in favor of the Orange Menace, an enormous backlash against the status quo as represented by Hillary ensured Trump`s victory. The media wasn`t responsible for Trump`s triumph, sure they provided the reality TV star with wall-to-wall coverage of his campaign speeches, but they were unabashedly in Hillary`s camp.

Trump campaigned as a populist, and he`s governing like a dictator, but the irony is that he was elected in a democratic fashion. Trump raised more in small-dollar donations than any presidential candidate in the history of our democracy. It was hardworking patriots in flyover country and frustrated blue-collar workers in the rust belt who sustained Trump`s campaign with their small donations.

Trump`s economic populist message resonated with millions of voters across the country, he owes his unexpected victory to rank-and-file voters.

Like it or not, Donald J. Trump is the president of all Americans, and we shouldn`t resort to undemocratic means (riots, fake news) to undermine and delegitimize his administration.

Read More:
http://www.nj.com/politics/index.ssf/2017/02/trump_funded_much_of_his_campaign_himself_heres_wh.html

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Sweden Terror Attack! Never Fjorget!

“President Donald Trump caused confusion during a Saturday rally in Florida when he said: `You look at what`s happening last night in Sweden. Sweden, who would believe this?` Trump then mentioned the French cities of Nice and Paris and the Belgian capital, Brussels. The three European cities were all attacked by terrorists over the past two years.

Although Trump did not explicitly say it, his remarks were widely perceived in the United States and abroad as suggesting that an attack had occurred Friday night in Sweden.”

Denver Post

What doesn`t happen in Sweden doesn`t stay in Sweden, the whole world is expressing solidarity with the Scandinavian country over the terror attack that didn`t happen.

Folks are expressing sympathy for Sweden in different ways: Furnishing their homes with IKEA furniture, dusting off their ABBA vinyl records and discoing their blues away, drowning their sorrows in mug after mug of Swiss Miss hot chocolate, trying to forget the Swedish massacre that never happened by watching Swiss porn . ..

We didn`t say anything when the press failed to cover the Bowling Green Massacre, but Never Again! We will smother Sweden with love as they struggle to cope with the faux massacre. We will demand that the fake news networks report this very real story.

Get with the program people, the least you can do is add a Swiss flag filter to your Facebook or Twitter profile picture.

With this one silly article I have exceeded my yearly quota of double and triple negatives.

Pray for Sweden! Never Fjorget!

Read More:
http://www.denverpost.com/2017/02/20/trump-sweden-whats-happening/

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Painter Paints UFO’s and ET’s He’s Seen Face to Face

“It`s no secret that the U.S. government has been discussing UFOs for quite some time; leaked FBI documents, emails from the Clinton campaign, the black budget secret space program, and even quotes from former U.S. presidents have confirmed that. Even the Vatican has addressed extraterrestrial intelligence, yet many people will simply brush off this subject as if it`s a joke.

Well, that`s not the case for Spanish artist Robert Llimós. After seeing a UFO and ETs face to face, he was inspired to share his experiences through his art. By painting what he saw, he hopes to desensitize people to ETs so that hopefully, if and when they finally return, people won`t be scared of their appearances.”

Collective Evolution

Spanish artist Robert Llimos paints himself as a humanitarian and peacemaker who paints UFO`s and extraterrestrials beings he has seen face to face to desensitize people to ET`s so that when they finally land and reveal themselves, humans won`t be afraid of their appearance.

The only thing Llimos has seen face to face is his paltry bank account, and in a desperate bid to increase sales of his UFO and ET paintings he claims he experienced close encounters of the 3rd kind with little green men from Mars.

I would welcome extraterrestrials with open arms, they aren`t as scary as the greedy and deceitful human heart.

Read More:
http://www.collective-evolution.com/2017/02/15/after-seeing-a-ufo-extraterrestrials-this-painter-is-delivering-a-message-from-space/

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FEBRUARY ARCHIVES PAGE TWO:

https://robertpaulreyes.com/february-archives-page-2-of-robert-paul-reyes-articles/

Donald Trump: Campaigner-in-Chief

Donald Trump`s default speech mode is hyperbole, and that bombastic style was a perfect fit in the worlds of professional wrestling and reality TV.

Trump`s disregard for the truth and over-the-top rhetoric served him well on the campaign trail, enough American swallowed his alternative facts to land him in the White House.

Trump`s shoot-from-the-hip style has been a disaster in the White House, his press conferences and tweets have infuriated and perplexed American politicians and foreign leaders.

The press isn`t seduced by Trump`s shtick, they are determined to hold him accountable for the excesses of his administration. They want the truth about his ties to Russia, and they want an explanation for the chaos swirling in the White House. Unfortunately, the media`s bias against conservatives in general and Trump in particular taints their mission to uncover the truth.

Trump thrives in chaos, but even he needs a break from the freak show, and he is seeking affirmation and refuge on the campaign trail.

The Donald returned on Saturday to the activity he enjoys the most: Running for the office he already holds. “I want to be among my friends and among the people,” Trump told a crowd of 9,000 diehard supporters at Orlando Melbourne International Airport in Melbourne, Florida.

The applause from his adoring true believers is an elixir for Trump, but he can`t campaign for the next four years. Trump can accomplish only so much from executive orders, sooner or later he has to govern. Trump doesn`t know the first thing about running a country or being commander-in-chief — we`re screwed.

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Donald Trump is Bonkers

“Al Franken recently raised a provocative question about Donald Trump: Is he mentally ill? On HBO`s Real Time with Bill Maher last week, the Minnesota senator claimed that some of his Republican colleagues have `great concern about the president`s temperament,` adding that `there`s a range in what they`ll say, and some will say that he`s not right mentally. And some are harsher.

Congressman Ted Lieu, a California Democrat, is introducing legislation that would require the White House to have a psychiatrist on staff. `I`m looking at it from the perspective of, if there are questions about the mental health of the president of the United States, what may be the best way to get the president treatment?` he told the Huffington Post.”

New Republic

You don`t have to be a psychiatrist or a psychologist to deduce that Donald Trump is bonkers.

The only thing up for debate is what drove Trump crazy: Untreated syphilis infected his brain? Orange spray tan seeped into his brain? Too many rejections by his daughter Ivanka?

After witnessing Trump`s surreal press conference on Thursday I said to myself:

This presser is so over-the-top it`s parody proof, Saturday Night Live has an impossible task trying to satirize the stream-of-consciousness rantings of a lunatic.

Trump is bonkers! Stark raving mad! Crazier than a shithouse rat!

Trump`s grip on power is secure for at least the next two years; America`s only hope is that in two years the Democrats will regain control of both houses of Congress and immediately begin impeachment proceedings against the Orange Menace.

In the meantime I hope that Pence, Priebus, and Banner will force Trump to sleep in a straightjacket so he can`t fire off any tweets in the middle of the night that will ignite World War III.

Read More:

https://newrepublic.com/article/140702/medical-theory-donald-trumps-bizarre-behavior

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