Melania Trump is Creeped Out by Donald Trump’s Double Jerk-Off Dance

Leave a comment

On Tuesday, May 19, pimp-in-chief Donald Trump and his bottom bitch, Melania Trump, hosted the annual White House Congressional Picnic. As they welcomed their guests, consisting of grifters, fluffers, MAGA cultists and assorted freaks, Trump busted out his patented dance move, known everywhere as the double jerk-off. To emphasize the fact that he is simulating a double hand job he typically performs the X-rated shimmy with the gay national anthem Y.M.C.A blaring in the background.

Trophy wife Melania Trump could not help but cringe as her octogenarian husband hit his signature dance move on the South Lawn of the White House this week. Melania is not a prude; she was a soft porn model and rumored to be a sex worker in her young adulthood.

But she has red lines when it comes to expressions of sexuality, and she absolutely hates it when her buffoonish and bloated bastard spouse does his creepy bop.

I am sure my readers are as creeped out as Melania, but bastard that I am I am not done creeping you out. Who do you think Trump fantasizes that he his jerking-off when he performs his nausea-inducing boogie? My guess is Bill Clinton and Arnold Palmer.

‘Rededicate 250’ Prayer Meeting on the National Mall was a White Nationalist Christian Shit Show

Leave a comment

The “Rededicate 250” prayer meeting was a massive, government-backed White Nationalist prayer rally held on the National Mall in Washington, D.C. on May 17,2026.

This religious spectacle, which mocked the principle of separation of church and state, made no effort to appear ecumenical. Nearly all the speakers were white evangelical Christians, aside from a rabbi and a few Catholics.

There were no Muslim, Buddhist or Hindu speakers, the organizers of this abomination did not want to offend the sensibilities of their blond surfer Jesus, by inviting infidels.

The white evangelicals who made the pilgrimage to Rededicate 250 are Trump’s most loyal and resolute supporters. These true believers worship their Orange Messiah, and they consider every lie, vanity and profanity that emanates from his sphincter-shaped mouth as the Gospel.

But instead of attending his administration’s nine-hour prayer festival Trump decided to play golf at his club in northern Virginia. Play golf or pray, it was a no-brainer for the irreligious sociopath.

Trump sent a prerecorded video message in which he read from 2 Chronicles 7:11–22—or, as he would probably call it, “Two Chronicles.”

It does not matter, the MAGA cultists still adore and worship their false god. Had Trump made an appearance and pissed on them from the stage, they would have thanked god for sending his son to baptize them with his golden urine.

Pastor Robert Jeffress Claims Trump Understands Bible Better than Pope Leo

Leave a comment

“A prominent Baptist pastor told Fox News on Saturday that President Donald Trump has a ‘better understanding’ of the bible than Pope Leo XIV when it concerns the military conflict with Iran.”

AOL.com

Donald Trump commenced a crusade against Pope Leo after he criticized the war in Iran, prompting the warmonger to accuse him of weakness and political bias.

On one side of this holy war, you have Pope Leo the spiritual leader of 1.2 billion Roman Catholics worldwide, and on the other you have Donald Trump the spiritual leader of about 45 million MAGA cultists in the USA.

Hmm, let me see who do I think has greater clarity and spiritual insight on issues of war and peace? Pope Leo XIV the leader of the Roman Catholic Church who has nine years of higher education dedicated strictly to theological, graduate, and advanced ecclesiastical studies or Donald Trump who’s never read the Bible and has a penchant for holding it upside down?

Is Robert Jeffress an impartial voice in this debate? Hardly. The evangelical pastor is a prominent, long-standing Trump supporter who regularly defends him on Fox News and is considered one of his most loyal evangelical fluffers.

Modern popes preach the Gospel of Peace as a core part of their global ministry, calling for diplomacy and negotiations to prevail over violent rhetoric and war. That is what popes do, they preach peace.

Only an antichrist figure would start a feud with the pontiff for calling for a diplomatic solution to the illegal war on Iran.

Jesus must be spinning in his grave over the way infidels are perverting his Gospel of Peace.

Early Morning Senior Mall Walkers: the Zombie Apocalypse

Leave a comment

As a senior citizen, I have given up many lifelong hobbies because I no longer have the physical agility, coordination, or mental sharpness to do them—or to enjoy them.

As a teenager, I used to play basketball all day long at my local playground. I haven’t touched a basketball in decades, and if I attempted to shoot a ball through a hoop it would be as futile as attempting a hole-in-one on a par three hole.

Jogging has been the one constant in my adult life, and I still make my usual rounds through the neighborhood with my loyal dog. In spring, when the sky is blue, the grass is green, and the roses are in bloom, I feel energized and renewed. When I get home and plop down on the sofa, all my joints may creak, and I may be out of breath, but nevertheless I feel like a young man.

My septuagenarian sister has long urged me to give up my daily jog around the neighborhood and walk at the mall instead. Mall walking is popular with seniors, and many malls open their doors one to three hours before the stores do to accommodate morning walkers.

Today I decided to give mall walking a try. I arrived at the shopping center at eight in the morning; the stores were shuttered, and many of the lights were still off. The place felt like the set of a post-apocalyptic horror film: older walkers shuffled past, their glaucoma-blurred eyes sliding right over me.

I was chilled to the bone. I am not as nimble as I used to be, and I wasn’t sure I could run away from them. I glanced at my reflection in the mirror, and to my horror I discovered that I looked just like them.

Lesson learned: I will not go to the mall before it officially opens again. Tomorrow, I will be back to jogging around the block.

Evangelical Clergy Bless Unveiling of Trump Gold Statue

Leave a comment

A colossal gold leaf statue of Donald Trump was unveiled at the president’s golf course in Doral Florida. The 22-foot abomination depicts the president thrusting his fist into the air, in a defiant gesture.

You would expect Christian and Jewish leaders to keep their distance from a ceremony that celebrates a brazen act of idolatry. Both Jewish and Christian traditions condemn the sin of idolatry as codified in the 2nd Commandment: Thou shalt not make unto thee any graven image.

 It should not be surprising that Trump’s longtime spiritual advisor Pastor Mark Burns and a circle of evangelical and Jewish clergy blessed the unveiling of this travesty.

Burns likely knew he was blessing a golden calf or, in Trump’s case, a golden pig. “Let me be clear: this is not a golden calf,” he protested.

Burns is familiar with the story of the golden calf:

While Moses was on Mount Sinai for 40 days receiving the Ten Commandments from God, the Israelites grew impatient and pressured his brother Aaron to create a golden calf. On Moses’ command, the Levites killed 3,000 men involved in the idolatry.

Whether you read the golden-calf story as history or as an allegory, the point stands: people who deify themselves are ultimately undone by vanity, arrogance, and stupidity.

Whatever one thinks of Donald Trump, many evangelicals have elevated him to a near-messianic status and accountability will follow. As surely as any graven image can fall, his political moment will pass; the moral arc bends toward justice, and the movement that enabled his abuses will face lasting scrutiny and consequences.

Susan Collins is a Quivering Mess

Leave a comment

“Senator Susan Collins has said the shaking seen in recent campaign videos is caused by a benign essential tremor, following days of online speculation about her health as she seeks re-election in Maine’s closely watched 2026 Senate race.”

Newsweek

Susan Collins often claims to be concerned about Donald Trump’s statements, posts, and policies and then votes with him anyway. Even if Trump signed an executive order demanding that every MAGA loyalist sacrifice their firstborn as proof of allegiance, she would clutch her pearls, voice her concerns, and then ask if she could offer up a sibling instead since she has no children.

What should concern Collins is the head shaking that disrupts her speech. She insists it is caused by a benign essential tremor and says she is not worried about it.

Collins has had this condition throughout her public career, but it has worsened significantly, and some observers worry it could kill the septuagenarian.

We are all familiar with Donald Trump’s signature dance which makes him look like he is jerking off two dicks; many GOP politicians have imitated his dance to show solidarity with him. Collins has never attempted the infamous dance because she realizes that it would make her look like she is clutching two vibrating dildos.

I am concerned about the Republicans retaining control of the Senate in the midterm elections, the good people of Minnesota should vote this quivering spinless idiot out of office.

Phone Plan for Christians that Blocks Porn Will Fail, They Love Them Some Porn

“A new US-wide cell phone network (Radiant Mobile) marketed to Christians is set to launch next week. It blocks porn, which experts in network security say marks the first time a US cell plan has used network-level blocking for such content that can’t be turned off even by adult account owners. It’s also rolling out a filter on sexual content aimed at blocking material related to gender and trans issues.”

Technology Review.com

Evangelicals will sign up by the millions for a cell phone network that blocks porn and LGBTQ content, right?

Wrong! Fundies will claim that this porn-free cell service is the greatest thing since sliced bread and leisure suits, but they are going to keep their cell phone plans that allow them unfettered access to hard core porn.

Even as evangelicals condemn pornography and protest LGBTQ-related content, the Bible Belt has the highest porn consumption in the country.

At Republican National Conventions and Turning Point USA events, Tinder and Grindr often see sharp usage spikes in the host city. The same kind of hypocrisy shows up among prominent closeted evangelicals including Senators Lindsey Graham, Tim Scott, Tom Cotton, and Josh Hawley; House Speaker Mike Johnson; and commentator Bennie Johnson.

When a religious or political convention comes to town especially one marked by worship and public piety Grindr activity tends to surge, and nearby hotels often fill with male sex workers.

Mark my words: Radiant Mobile will fail because many evangelicals still want access to pornography, especially girl-on-girl content.

The Best Male Collegiate Volleyball Player is Delightfully Gay

Volleyball is a physically demanding sport, but because it is a non-contact game some critics dismiss it as “soft”, feminine” or “gay.” Volleyball has a net separating opponents, rendering macho man-to-man contact impossible. The worst players can do is lob insults at their opponents on the other side of the net.

Jordan Lucas is arguable the best collegiate volleyball player, the outside-hitter is renowned for his deadly spikes and for his trademark flamboyant hair flips, air kisses, and stereotypically gay demeanor.

His eye-catching celebrations after killer plays, energize the crowd and pump-up his teammates.

But not everyone is a fan, there’s always the homophobe who can’t appreciate Lucas’ amazing play, because he gets hung up on his theatrics. Volleyball announcer Charlie Brande made a pointed remark after Lucas delivered one of his patented hair-flips:

“I’m amazed Jordan Lucas hasn’t been popped by somebody. The antics he’s making under the net, it’s very distasteful.”

I bet “Mr. Macho” Brande has no problem with the butt-slaps, huddles, pile-ons, crop-top jerseys, and tight uniforms common in the NFL, but a hair-flip gets his panties in a twist.

Brande’s comment implicitly encourages violence against players who are different and confident enough to be themselves on and off the court. Thankfully, he was fired for the remark.

I am not going to stop watching women’s beach volleyball in favor of men’s volleyball, but I admire Lucas and I wish him all the best.

Trump’s Gold Statue of Himself Compared to North Korea’s Dear Leader

“Donald Trump has a new 15-foot gold statue at his Miami golf resort, and the internet immediately made the same comparison: North Korea.

The statue, nicknamed “Don Colossus,” was installed at Trump National Doral Miami ahead of the PGA Tour’s Cadillac Championship. It shows Trump with one fist raised.”

MSN.com

The White House is frequently referred to as “The People’s House,” indicating that it belongs to the American public rather than the President. A president is a tenant at the People’s House for a period of four years; as a tenant, he is not allowed to make any major alterations or modifications to the iconic building without Congressional approval and funding. The real estate developer-in-chief has demolished the East Wing and paved over the Rose Garden without Congressional approval. The American public is the landlord and Congress acting on our behalf just evict this lawless tenant.

Besides these major renovations Trump has also made many cosmetic changes to the White House, especially to the Oval Office. The Liberace wannabe has redecorated the Oval Office with extensive gold accents during his second term. Approximately one-third of the walls are now covered in gold-plated appliques, frames, and other decorations.

Everything Trump touches turns to fool’s gold; the Oval Office is not the only place he has turned into an aesthetic nightmare. He also erected a 15-foot gold statue at his Miami golf resort.

Both Donald Trump and Kim Jong Un are fat AF, but the respective sculptors had the good sense to make dictators look slim. If the Korean sculptor had depicted the Dear Leader as corpulent, he would have been executed; and if the American sculptor had depicted Trump as roly-poly, he would have been fired and ostracized.

Trump likes to believe that everything he touches turns to gold, but the truth is that everything his grotesque tiny hands touch turns to shit. I am not a sculptor, but I could create a more accurate representation of Donald Trump; I would simply instruct my dog to crap on the White House lawn, and I would put a MAGA cap on top of it.

Trump Endorses Rebranding ICE as NICE

Donald Trump’s Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) agents are as universally despised as Adolph Hitler’s Gestapo police force. Hitler used the Gestapo as an instrument of terror to identify, suppress, and eliminate all perceived enemies of his fascist state, including Communists, trade unionists, gay men, and people of faith who put God above the state, Gypsies and of course Jews.

Trump uses ICE thugs as an instrument of terror to identify, suppress and eliminate all enemies of his White Christian Nationalist regime, including Democrats, late-night comics, the LGBT community, Muslims, people of color and all people of faith who do not recognize him as the incarnation of Jesus Christ.

Trump never resists a good rebranding opportunity; witness his rebranding of the Gulf of Mexico as the “Gulf of America” and the Department of Defense as the “Department of War.” Therefore, it is not surprising that he endorsed a conservative influencer’s suggestion that ICE be renamed NICE (National Immigration and Customs Enforcement), so the media would be forced to use the phrase “NICE agents.”

A rose by any other name would smell as sweet, and shit by any other name would stink as bad. ICE agents with their aggressive tactics, deceptive tactics, lack of transparency and penchant for killing peaceful demonstrators are the antithesis of nice.

Trump is too clever by half, by endorsing the silly suggestion that ICE agents be rebranded NICE agents, he is only reminding us that they are vicious jackbooted thugs.

Boomers Have a Right to be Cranky

I have been a misanthrope all my life, and now that I’m a senior citizen even my most pollyannaish friends, acquaintances, former co-workers and family members are as grouchy as I am. Why are boomers so irritable and crabby, and liable to throw a fit at the drop of a hat, and complain about everything under the sun?

In the 1960s, lead was common in everyday life: in house paint, water pipes, car fuel, and even children’s toys. Boomers grew up with widespread exposure, and lead poisoning can cause long-term psychological effects, including “less adaptive personality profiles in adulthood,” which may make it harder to adjust when routines change. Even so, I do not think lead exposure alone explains why boomers are so crotchety.

Let us get real, when every joint in your body aches, when you’re blind as a bat and deaf as a doornail, you are not going to be prancing around like freaking Rebecca of Sunnybrook Farm.

Old folks do not remember what we had for breakfast, but we remember every perceived slight and every insult going back to kindergarten, and when a young whippersnapper makes a snide remark because we’re taking too long at the ATM, we lash out as if he was braying in a discordant choir with every wanker who ever made fun of us.

Young people would be well-advised to give us a wide berth, if our toxic tongue does not get you our noxious farts will.

Lights Out for Sleepy Don

Donald Trump, who will turn 80 in June, is the oldest person ever elected president. Octogenarians need plenty of rest and naps to get through a normal day weeding the garden, polishing the silverware, and watching the grass grow.

Unfortunately, unlike most octogenarians Trump is not retired, he is the President of the United States and the putative Leader of the Free World, the most exhausting and stressful occupation in the world.

The bloated bastard with his cankles, double chin, discolored hands and tentative gait is in obvious need of numerous naps throughout the day. Behind closed doors he may sleep all day, waking up only to rage tweet, berate his subordinates, and have his diapers changed.

Sleepy Don is a very sleepy boy; he takes naps during Cabinet meetings and other official events at the White House.

The decrepit and demented president struggled to stay awake during a Healthcare Affordability event on Thursday afternoon at the White House. Trump’s bobblehead lolled to the side, and his face drooped as he shut his raccoon eyes. At one point, he shifted backward in his chair and tilted his head back, appearing to be in dreamland, while his sycophants praised him.

Trump’s defenders insist that when their Dear Leader appears to be napping, he is actually resting his myopic eyes while others say he is cleverly illustrating his fight against wokeness.

Let’s get real, Trump is physically and mentally unfit to be president, and he should be removed from office before the sleepy moron starts World War III.

Most Boomers Can’t Afford a New Car

Since I turned eighteen, I have always had a car—even if my early ones were old, run-down hoopties.

Upon securing an entry-level position at a major corporation, I considered purchasing a new sports car. But with my meager salary I could only afford a brand-new red Chevrolet Chevette.

The Chevette is often regarded as one of the worst cars ever. It was a basic, no-frills vehicle built primarily for fuel efficiency during the 1970s oil crisis, with little emphasis on comfort or performance.

A chick magnet it was not, but I felt like a pimp cruising down the highway, breathing in that new-car smell.

The new basic trim for 1980 did not come with an AM radio, but its price tag was under $4,000. In the ensuing years I upgraded a few times, purchasing new cars with more horsepower and sex appeal than my Chevette.

As a senior citizen on a fixed income, I currently drive a 2003 Ford Focus. Given my financial circumstances, it is unlikely that I will be able to purchase a new vehicle (average price 50K) unless I experience a financial windfall, such as winning the lottery.

How I miss cruising down the highway in my bright red Chevette, with Madonna’s “Holiday” blaring from my after-market radio.

Trump Will Participate in Marathon Bible Reading

After a week marked by Donald Trump’s public feud with Pope Leo XIV and his sharing of an AI-generated image portraying himself as Jesus on Truth Social, Trump is set to participate in the “America Reads the Bible Marathon,” which is a week-long livestreamed event.

It is laughable that the morbidly obese octogenarian would participate in any kind of marathon.

The functionally illiterate degenerate who has never read the Bible is trying to sanitize his image as a Christian. Trump could read the entire Bible is the original Hebrew, Greek and Aramaic and he still would not convince me that he is a genuine Christian.

Trump is set to recite 2 Chronicles 7:14

“If my people, which are called by my name, shall humble themselves, and pray, and seek my face, and turn from their wicked ways; then will I hear from heaven, and will forgive their sin, and will heal their land.”

Hell will freeze over before the narcissist humbles himself before God, and repents of his myriad sins, including pedophilia, rape, racism, homophobia, and misogyny.

Key participants scheduled to participate in the Bible reading marathon include MAGA stalwarts: the drunkard Secretary of War Pete Hegseth, the closeted House Speaker Mike Johnson, the Trump fluffer Franklin Graham, and the most despised member of the Senate, Ted Cruz.

The Museum of the Bible in Washington, D.C. is set to host the “America Reads the Bible” marathon. I hope the Almighty will smite this unholy gathering of grifters, hypocrites and blasphemers.  

MAGA Evangelicals Shrug at Trump’s Blashemy

After evangelical Pastor Paula White, the Senior Advisor to the White House Faith Office, compared Donald Trump to Jesus Christ, Trump doubled down on the blasphemy, sacrilege, and heresy by posting on his Truth Social platform, an AI generated image depicting him as Jesus.

The blasphemous image depicted the billionaire buffoon in biblical-style white and red robes with light emanating from his demonically tiny hands as he healed a Jeffrey Epstein doppelganger in a hospital bed.

A horned, winged, demonic creature appeared in the background, seemingly giving his Satanic blessing as Trump attempted to resurrect the infamous pedophile.

White is a Prosperity Gospel grifter, thrice-married Jezebel with a penchant for speaking in tongues. The Dear Leader was sending a message to his sycophantic MAGA supporters: do not try to upstage me, I am the king of tomfoolery, narcissism, and blasphemy.

Trump’s remarks were considered offensive by Mainline Protestants, Roman Catholics, and Muslims, who hold differing views on Jesus but regard him with respect.

While several well-known MAGA evangelicals voiced their concern and disapproval, the majority of MAGA supporters reacted to Trump’s recent antics with indifference.

White evangelicals have a transactional relationship, not a spiritual kinship with their bloated Savior. They will praise and even worship him if he continues to support the genocidal state of Israel, oppose abortion and appoint conservative Supreme Court Justices.

If Trump throws one of his dirty diapers on a Nativity Scene, they will merely shrug and praise him to high heaven.

AI Jesus on the Mainline, Tell Him What You Want

“For some evangelical Christians, faith is about having a personal relationship with Jesus. At $1.99 per minute, the tech company Just Like Me is taking that concept to a new level.

AP

Evangelical Christianity is a moneymaking scheme, ministers of megachurches live in luxury, while many of their parishioners struggle to make ends meet.

The Prosperity Gospel segment of the evangelical movement is especially predatory; they prey on the poor and vulnerable by promising miraculous returns on tithes and love offerings given to the church.

It should come as no surprise that an AI Jesus chatbot is a swindle to steal money from gullible evangelicals (oxymoron?)

Suckers can engage in a video call with a Jesus avatar generated by AI. The algorithm offers prayers and praise calculated to please the supplicants and intended to make them addicted to the virtual Jesus.

In some ways the AI Jesus is superior to the historical Jesus. Prayer in a real sense is a monologue, not a dialogue. Jesus never audibly responds to the prayers of the faithful, regardless how sincere and earnest they are. Evangelicals never see the object of their veneration, when praying they picture in their minds what their deity looks like.

Subscribers of this platform can join a video call with the AI Jesus, they can see him and he audibly responds to their queries and prayers.

AI Jesus on the mainline, tell him what you want.

AI Jesus on the mainline, for just $1.99 per minute,

He’ll answer your prayers.

Pete Hegseth Farts at Podium

Politicians need to be careful about hot mic moments—these are times when someone is unknowingly recorded speaking frankly or saying something inappropriate because they did not realize the microphone was on.

It is par for the course for Secretary of War Pete Hegseth to utter inappropriate comments glorifying violence and advocating Christian fascism in his press conferences, so I am not sure he worries about being caught in a hot mic moment.

As Hegseth was standing at a podium ready to brief reporters on the Iran war, a distinct sound of what could only be a fart was heard. He quickly looked up to see if anyone noticed the embarrassing sound.

The notorious alcoholic has been accused of drinking alcohol at the podium before, but this is the first time he has been recorded farting at the podium.

After drinking alcohol, a person may experience an excessive amount of belching, abdominal bloating, and flatulence; I expect flatulence to become a common occurrence at Hegseth’s speeches and press conferences.

Hegseth has a penchant for leaking classified information, it should not come as a surprise that he has leaks of the gastrointestinal tract.

As much as Hegseth drinks, I am surprised his fart sounded like a pistol firing and not staccato machine gun fire.

Whenever I hear vitriolic rhetoric emanate from the drunk’s mouth I feel like vomiting, but I am lucky that I have not been exposed to the foul stench that originates from his rear end.

Mark Burns, Trump’s Spiritual Adviser Makes Excuses for his Profanity-Laced Tirade

“Pastor Mark Burns revealed he confronted the president about his profanity-laced tirade on Truth Social:

“I think the president is very much like a Peter a very foul-mouthed individual.

But the president is not the pastor of the USA. He is the President of the USA. He is not the moral authority of our nation.”

MSN

I seriously doubt Burns privately confronted Trump about his profane rant on Truth Social. See my essay:

https://robertpaulreyes.com/trumps-truth-social-posts-insults-christianity-and-islam/

Burns is an Uncle Tom who vociferously supports Trump and the GOP, even though their rhetoric and policies are antithetical to the interests of Blacks. If he is too much of a coward to confront Trump about his blatant racism, he will not confront him about anything else.

Burns is too obsequious and cowardly to speak truth to power, instead of rebuking the foul-mouthed president, he made excuses for him. The mealy-mouthed sycophant compared Trump to the Apostle Peter who denied knowing Jesus three times on the night of Jesus’ arrest, and in his final denial, he swore to emphasize his point. If Burns was a true Christian he would have compared Trump to Judas, and not to the apostle that Roman Catholics consider the first pope.

Trump is the president of our country, not the pastor of our country, but that doesn’t give him carte blanche to post a profane, inflammatory rant to the leader of another country.

I’m not the president or a pastor, as a humble blogger I’ll speak on behalf Americans that are tired of Trump’s racist, vulgar, childish and authoritarian behavior: Fuck off and die, you freaking moron.

Trump’s Truth Social Posts Insults Christianity and Islam

On Saturday Donald Trump warned Iran in a Truth Social post:

“Remember when I gave Iran ten days to MAKE A DEAL or OPEN UP THE HORMUZ STRAIT. Time is running out – 48 hours before all Hell will reign down on them. Glory be to GOD!”.

We’re not suffering from dementia, we remember a threat you issued only a few days ago, but we also recall that you are the TACO president who makes over-the-top threats – such as massive tariffs or military strikes – only to delay, reduce, or cancel them after adverse market or public reaction.

Why should Iran take Trump’s bluster seriously, when they are cognizant that he may soil his diapers at any moment, go into a tantrum and forget his admonishments?

Trump’s threat of perpetrating war crimes by blowing up civilian infrastructure – coupled with his invoking of God – is a troubling sign that America is turning into a Christian theocracy led by a sociopath warmonger.

On Sunday Trump warned Iran in a Truth Social post:

“Tuesday will be Power Plant Day, and Bridge Day, all wrapped up in one, in Iran. There will be nothing like it!!! Open the Fucking Strait, you crazy bastards, or you’ll be living in Hell – JUST WATCH! Praise be to Allah. President DONALD J. TRUMP.”

On Saturday Trump made a mockery of Christianity by implying that Jehovah blesses war crimes, and on Sunday he insulted Islam with his “Praise be to Allah” taunt. MAGA Christians may not give a fuck if their orange messiah defiles Christianity, but both the Iranian Shia Muslims and the Gulf State Sunni Muslims are outraged by Trump’s Islamophobia.

Trump’s rant ensures that Iran will never give in to his demands, and they will cause our Sunni allies to reconsider their relationship with an unstable American ally.

Grandma Faces Trial for Wearing Penis Costume to No Kings Protest

Renea Gamble, 62, attended the No Kings rally in Fairhope, Alabama, on October 18, 2025. It is De rigueur for protesters at “No King’s” rallies to dress in inflatable frog costumes to project a non-threatening image, but Gamble chose a more provocative getup: a 7-foot inflatable penis.

Standing erect holding an American flag on one hand and a handmade sign reading “No Dick Tator” on the other, Gamble was an imposing figure. Her outfit was unusual and controversial, yet it fit America’s tradition of peaceful protest.

Trump and his allies have escalated attacks on dissent – prosecuting non-violent protestors as terrorists and punishing free speech. They are out-of-control, throwing the book at a grandma engaging in peaceful protest.

Gamble’s initial arrest was for the minor offense of disorderly conduct. Months later, she is now facing two additional charges in relation to the October incident: giving officers a false name and breaking a city ordinance related to disturbing the peace.

The authorities need to get off Gamble’s dick; her amusing garb does not merit heavy-handed prosecution.

The real dick in this incident is law enforcement. I do not understand why their panties are in a twist, a phallus waving an American flag is exactly what the average MAGA cultist looks like.

Don’t Let Your Boomer Relatives Use Checks

Baby boomers are stubborn as hell, they cling to their old-school ways, like still using checks to pay their bills or making purchases.

Using paper checks is the least secure payment method. Unlike modern digital transactions that use encryption and multi-factor authentication, checks physically expose your most sensitive financial data to anyone who handles your check.

The number of people who handle a physical check before it reaches a typically passes through three or four different hands in a standard mailing scenario: postal workers, the recipient, depositor, and the bank teller.  Any of these individuals can access your financial information and empty your bank account.

Each check from Grandma Betty or Auntie Hilda reveals her name, address, bank account and routing number, signature, and sometimes phone number—valuable information for criminals.

If a boomer relative is still using checks, they need an intervention. Don’t just say, “Ok Boomer”, I guess you are too pigheaded to change. Scare them straight and warn them that if they persist in using checks, they run the risk of identify theft and ending up penniless and homeless.

Responsible individuals discourage boomers from using checks.  

Trump’s Signature to Appear on Dollar Bills

“President Donald Trump’s signature will be added to all future U.S. paper currency starting with the $100 bill, the first time in history that a sitting president’s signature will appear on American banknotes, the U.S. Treasury announced March 26.”

USA Today

The phrase “dollar is king” refers to the U.S. dollar’s role as the world’s dominant reserve currency and its primary position in global trade and finance.

Donald Trump posted “LONG LIVE THE KING!” on Truth Social after ending New York City’s congestion pricing program. He rules unilaterally, issuing executive orders to bypass Congress and he ignores judicial decisions, believing himself the final authority on legal matters.

To appease Trump’s king-size ego his John Hancok will be added to all future U.S. paper currency. The first $100 bills bearing his signature will be printed in June 2026.

Today I participated in a “No Kings” rally in Lynchburg, Va, I abhor how Trump is destroying our democracy by acting like a king who answers to nobody but himself. My readers may be surprised that I think his name belongs on currency, whether as an honor or otherwise.  

The dollar is no longer king. Brazil, Russia, India, China, Egypt, Indondesia, and South Africa are seeking to reduce reliance on the U.S. dollar by settling trade in local currencies and developing alternative payment systems like BRICS Pay. Trump’s fascist behavior is accelerating the attempt to dethrone King Dollar. Trump’s scribble fits a falling currency.

Trump’s squiggle resembles an electrocardiogram and seeing it on our currency will give us hope that he will soon be dead of a heart attack or stroke. We all need a little bit of hope in these trying times.

By adding small dots to the peaks of his jagged, multi-peaked signature, the resulting image resembles a group of people wearing Ku Klux Klan hoods, making it the perfect symbol for his Nazi regime.

So yeah, I am down with Trump’s impression appearing on our currency.

My Nightmare: Meeting Trump in Person

I would never attend a Trump political rally or campaign event; I would rather be on a line for a proctological exam than be on a meet-and-greet line for the fascist monster. The likelihood of ever meeting him is nonexistent, but late at night when I am tossing and turning, I sometimes wonder if I would survive a close encounter with the pedophile-in-chief.

I like to look a person straight in the eyes, but the prospect of staring into the soulless raccoon eyes of the sociopath makes my skin crawl. Friedrich Nietzsche is well known for his assertion: “If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss also gazes into you.”  What alien thoughts would infect my consciousness if I looked into the eyes of a man without empathy?

If I avoided locking eyes with him and instead gazed at his hair, would that be any better? Being only inches away from his grotesque toupee that looks like cotton candy soaked in the urine of Russian escorts would cause me to lose my lunch.

If I focus on his mouth that resembles a sphincter, the price I would pay would be life-long therapy.

If I avoid his countenance altogether and glimpse at his neck, I would be confronted with an abomination that looks like a prolapsed vagina. Ogling a naked vagina is every heterosexual male’s fantasy, but when it is on the neck of a senile pedophile, it is every male’s nightmare.

I have survived many horrible experiences but thank God I have never endured the soul-quenching ordeal of meeting Trump face-to-face.

Trump Commemorative Gold Coin is an Abomination

“The Trump-appointed U.S. Commission of Fine Arts last week approved the design of a 24-karat gold commemorative coin — featuring Trump — to mark the 250th anniversary of America.”

MSN.com

The commemorative Trump coin will not circulate as currency, but two other coins bearing Trum’s butt-ugly mug, including a $1 piece that would be in circulation and a one-ounce gold one.

Living presidents do not appear on U.S. currency. Federal law explicitly prohibits depicting any living person on official currency to distinguish the American Republic from banana republics, monarchies, theocracies, and dictatorships that glorify and deify current leaders.

It is not a surprise that a Trump hand-picked group of lackeys approved the execrable design unanimously. They would have approved a design depicting their Dear Leader wearing a crown.

The commemorative coin features a serious-looking Trump leaning forward with fists clenched. This is a ridiculous attempt to make the draft-dodging coward look macho and menacing.

The other side of the coin should depict explosive diarrhea emanating from Trump’s naked fat ass.

I will certainly not buy the Trump commemorative coin, and I will refuse to accept in change any Trump coin that is in circulation.

A coin with Trump’s image may be par for the course in a White Nationalist Christian theocracy, but our country is still (barely) a democracy, and it’s anathema to me.

Trump Struggles to Fit Cankles Under Tiny Desk

The Resolute Desk is the most historic and iconic desk in American history. Nearly every president since Jimmy Carter has used it in the Oval Office. Donald Trump, who loves all the trappings of power, holds court behind the Resolute Desk, as he signs executive orders and lords it over White House correspondents.

Trump is a vile, vindictive, and petty little man, and it is an affront to decency for him to park his lard ass behind such a magnificent and historical piece of furniture.

The grifter-in-chief looks more natural sitting at the portable signing desk, the tiny Georgian-style wooden table typically used for bill-signing ceremonies when a large group of politicians and dignitaries needs to fit into the frame. A little desk for a little man with little imagination.

Trump, 79, grimaced while lowering his fat ass to the portable signing desk on Friday. He was honoring the Navy football team with the Commander-in-Chief’s trophy following their win against Army last December. As he went to sit down at the tiny desk to sign an executive order, he thrust out his leg for support, bending his cankle at an awkward angle. The buffoon gripped the sides of the desk to lower his bulk down. It is remarkable that the small desk remained intact; however, it is likely that the physical effort resulted in a soiled diaper.

An obese sociopath, sitting at a tiny desk, which fails to hide his fat cankles is the perfect illustration for the Trump administration, the only thing missing is a chamber pot underneath the desk.