robert paul reyes

My Annal Mariah Carey Christmas Essay

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Hate me if you will, but I will once again post my annual Mariah Carey Christmas essay:

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, everywhere you go. There’s a slightly inebriated Santa at the local mall, a Salvation Army bell ringer soliciting spare change outside the Dollar General, giant inflated Santas promoting kitsch, and Mariah Carey’s “All I want for Christmas is You” blaring from every radio, stereo and public address system. And of course, it once again occupies its exalted place at No. 1 of Billboard’s Top 100 Holiday songs.

Evangelicals have never held so much political power at a time when America has never been more secular. It’s not the Christmas hymns of yore that resonate with Americans, but the secular chestnuts of recent vintage like “Last Christmas” by Wham, “Santa Claus is Coming to Town” by the Jackson Five, and of course “All I Want for Christmas is You” by the Queen of Christmas.

Mariah has supplanted the Virgin Mary as the most revered female of the Christmas season. The mother of Jesus, being a virgin, simply cannot compete with the playful sensuality and unbridled joy manifest in all of Carey’s musical catalog, especially “All I Want…”

I take my duty as an ambassador for the Queen of Christmas seriously, by having her iconic Xmas song playing in repeat on all my audio devices, by sending Mariah memes to all my friends and enemies and by continuing my tradition of writing my annual Mariah Christmas essay.

Mariah Carey – All I Want For Christmas Is You (Official Video)

‘Brain Rot’ Oxford Dictionary Word of the Year

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“Brain rot is the Oxford dictionaries’ word of the year.

Oxford defines brain rot as ‘the supposed deterioration of a person’s mental or intellectual state, especially viewed as the result of overconsumption of material, now particularly online content.”

Associated Press

Everything about living in a technologically addicted society induces brain rot, but nothing more so than social media.

In the halcyon days of the internet, cats, porn, social media, and news sites waxed supreme. Cats and porn still reign supreme, but social media platforms have degenerated into toxic cesspools dominated by trolls, bots and AI generated misinformation. TikTok, the world’s most popular social media platform lends itself to silly dance videos, dangerous fads and influencers who are adept at cultivating brain rot. Consuming social media is responsible for more brain rot than Bobby Kennedy Jr’s brain worm.

Politics, in the age of Donald Trump, has dropped the nation’s IQ to room temperature. Trump’s stock-in-trade is chaos and buffoonery, and his cabinet of clowns, charlatans and creeps has rendered us in a terminal case of brain rot. I can feel my brain cells rotting whenever I interact with any MAGA cultist.

 Cell phones may or may not cause brain cancer, but there’s no doubt that they cause brain rot. When we are connected with our phones, we are disconnected from real life, and our brains starve from failure to connect and be stimulated by real people.

The only cure from brain rot is less screen time and less exposure to Trump.

Trump Will Meet the Same Fate as the Biblical Samson

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Christian Nationalist evangelical pastor Rob McCoy believes that twice impeached, thrice married and a gazillion times indicted Donald Trump was anointed by God to lead a sinful nation. He compares the disgraced former and future president to the biblical Samson, whom he characterizes as a flawed individual used by the Almighty to accomplish His will.

I cannot argue with McCoy’s description of America as a sinful nation. The United States is as sinful as the Germany of the late 1930’s that allowed a sociopath to gain ultimate power by promising to restore the greatest of a Germany diminished and demoralized by the humiliating armistice that ended World War I. Hitler’s Third Reich ended with Europe in ruins, and Germany completed destroyed. You do not have to be a political science major or a historian to read the writing on the wall — the Trump regime will end with our democracy in ruins.

The German church was complicit in the rise of Hitler to power, and the white evangelical church in America has served as the vanguard to restoring Trump to power.

The Samson of the Bible was not a heroic figure, he was a monster who attached torches to the tails of 300 foxes to burn Philistine crops and a bloodthirsty warrior who used a donkey’s jawbone to massacre 1,000 Philistines.

Likewise, Trump is not a heroic figure, his incompetence and rank stupidity during the COVID pandemic resulted in the needless death of hundreds of thousands.

Samson came to an ignominious end pushing apart the pillars of a Philistine banquet hall, killing himself and 3,000 Philistines.

Samson derived his power from his long luxurious locks and Trump derives his infamy from his wispy urine-colored hair. Trump’s reign will come to an ignominious end also, with the destruction of our democracy, and quite possibly in nuclear Armageddon.

Elon Musk Joins Donald Trump for Thanksgiving at Mar-a-Lago

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A turkey day video of Donald Trump and Elon Musk dining at the roped-off head table, preventing the MAGA riffraff from getting too close to the wealthiest man in the world dining with the most powerful man in the world, has gone viral.

Elon Musk had a seat at the family table at Mar-a-Lago, the mecca of the MAGA faithful. Musk, the father of 12 children with three different partners, chose to spend this family holiday with Trump and his sycophants rather than with his children.

Joining Trump at the head table was Melania, his trophy wife, who seldom deigns to appear with her husband in public. She sat next to her son Barron, who provided a buffer preventing her from interacting with her husband, more than was absolutely necessary.

Musk, who owns the social media platform X, formerly known as Twitter, wore a T-shirt with an “X” emblazoned on it. Musk has done to Twitter what Trump has done to America; since he bought Twitter the valuation of the company has plummeted, its reputation ruined, and its subscription base has shrunk.

The viral clip captured Trump paternally tapping Musk on the shoulder while his campaign anthem “YMCA” blared from the speakers, prompting the billionaire to raise his hand and move to the disco beat.

The video of the senile septuagenarian and the besotted billionaire trying to be cool is cringey as hell, but it’s also terrifying to realize that these two turkeys are in charge of our democracy.

North Korea’s Missile Shaped Skyscrapers

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North Korea a dystopian and impoverished country of twenty-four million inhabitants supports a military of more than 1 million soldiers. In comparison the United States with a population of 230 million has 1.29 million active-duty troops.

The Hermit Kingdom does not need such a vast army, nor does it need to spend 30% of its GDP annually on military expenditures, including nuclear weapons.

North Korea has a military-first political ideology, which means that military spending comes before feeding its starving masses, health care, infrastructure, and everything else.

North Korea does not need a million-soldier army, or nuclear weapons, none of the countries that border it, China, Russia, and South Korea pose any threat. Who would want to invade and occupy a failed nation with a starving population, no infrastructure and no oil or any other natural resources?

North Korea’s huge army and nuclear arsenal are not primarily to deter any outside threat, but to discourage its citizens from overthrowing its dictator, Kim Jong Un. Its nuclear intercontinental missiles also discourage the United States from meddling in its affairs.

Kim Jong-un’s iconic missile shaped skyscrapers dominate the skyline of North Korea’s capital, Pyongyang. They are symbolic of the failed dictatorship, residents of the towers can only use its elevators when there’s electricity, which, due to the nation’s faltering electrical grid, is for three hours in the evening. Imagine thousands of the residents trying to use the elevators at the same time, that pretty much sums up life in North Korea.

Did God Smite TD Jakes with a Stroke While Preaching?

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“During today’s service, Bishop T.D. Jakes experienced a slight health incident and received immediate medical attention following his powerful hour-long message. Bishop Jakes is stable and under the care of medical professionals.”

PageSix.Com

The morbidly obese 67-year-old Prosperity Gospel pastor dropped his microphone after delivering a lengthy sermon and fell silent. He then began involuntary shaking in his seat, leading many to believe he may have suffered a stroke. He was rushed to a hospital and is under the care of medical professionals.

The Prosperity Gospel teaches that it is always God’s will to heal. If you aren’t healing after prayer and supplication, it is because of your lack of faith.

A Prosperity Gospel church should practice what it preaches, instead of being rushed to a hospital to be ministered to by medical professionals, the church deacons should have surrounded the stricken pastor, laid hands on him, and prayed for healing and deliverance.

What a bunch of hypocrites, they know damn well that divine healing is a pile of shit, and the last thing they wanted was for their moneymaker to die so they called for an ambulance to take him to the hospital, the only place where real healing takes place.

If Jakes wasn’t guilty of the sin of gluttony he wouldn’t have to worry about heart issues. And maybe if he hadn’t attended dozens of freak-off parties at Diddy’s mansions, his heart wouldn’t be beating so fast, worried that he would be exposed as a hypocrite.

My Annual Thanksgiving Essay

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I am a curmudgeon with a penchant for writing editorials exposing the frailties and baser instincts of politicians, preachers, billionaires, and bureaucrats who wield power over us. But on Thanksgiving Day I channel the spirit of the Dalai Lama and I wax poetic about things and people that are a blessing in my life.

I’ve been posting essays online since 1998, and some of them have gone viral, but nothing is more satisfying and ego gratifying than seeing my words published in a print publication. There is a visceral thrill and tactile satisfaction in turning the pages of a newspaper and reading news, editorials, and community events. I’m thankful that the Bedford Bulletin still publishes a print edition.

I feel a familial obligation to contact my family members who live out of state on Thanksgiving, even the ones who have political and religious views that are antithetical to mine. I end the perfunctory call and check them off my list. But I am thankful for Jackie my sister I seamlessly vibe with; I feel refreshed, reenergized and thankful whenever I call her, not just at Thanksgiving.

I was devastated by the election results; it is sobering to realize that voters placed party and perceived economic benefits over democracy and freedom. But I am thankful that I live in a free country where I can still express my opposition to the party in power by writing letters to the editor, attending demonstrations, and publishing my anti-Trump essays on my blog.

Nancy Mace Wants to Force First Trans Congresswoman to Use Men’s Room

Sarah McBride, a Delaware state senator, made history as the first out transgender person elected to the House of Representatives.

McBride was overcome with gratitude at her historic victory gushing on Twitter/X:

“Thank you, Delaware! I am proud to be your next member of Congress. Delaware has sent the message loud and clear that … this is a democracy that is big enough for all of us.”

But before McBride has been sworn-in, she was hit with the harsh reality that transgender persons are second-class citizens in the Trump regime.

South Carolina Rep. Nancy Mace introduced a resolution to ban transgender women from women’s restrooms at the US Capitol.

“Sarah McBride doesn’t get a say. I mean, this is a biological man, the MAGA firebrand told reporters, adding that McBride “does not belong in women’s spaces, women’s bathrooms, locker rooms, changing rooms, period, full stop.”

Transgender women are women, period, full stop. Mace’s resolution to ban transgender women from women’s restrooms is discriminatory, anti-trans bigotry and bullying of the worst kind.

McBride should be welcomed with open arms by her Republican colleagues, her victory is a sign that we are making progress in making America a more perfect union. McBride should be allowed to focus on passing legislation that benefits her constituents and not have to waste time fighting a blatantly anti-trans resolution.

In a perfect world this misguided resolution would go down in flames, but I’m afraid that it may very well pass in the GOP-controlled House of Representatives.

Elonia and Donald Trump Make the Perfect Couple

“Elon Musk has unexpectedly found himself reimagined as America’s ‘First Lady’ over his close friendship with President-elect Donald Trump. Social media users have humorously used AI-generated images to depict the billionaire in various feminine roles typically associated with the position of a First Lady.”

INQUISITR.COM

Melania Trump only made a couple of campaign appearances with her husband during his long campaign to regain his throne, and she’s made it explicitly clear that she plans on living in New York to be close to the real love of her life, Barron who is a student at NYU.

Melania has never shown any affection for Donald, her aversion is manifest in her penchant for swatting away his creepy little hand whenever he tries to hold hers.

Elon, on the other hand, basks in the presence of Trump; he’s practically moved into Mar-a-Lago after the election. Elon’s love for Trump may not be unrequited, the president-elect is smitten with Elon’s billions which he freely spent to elect the love of his life.

Trump’s love for Elon may be romantic, who knows maybe the world’s richest man has a package as big as his bank accounts. We all remember how Trump rhapsodized about the length and girth of Arnold Palmer’s dick.

In any event Trump doesn’t need his frigid wife to keep him warm at nights and to dutifully stand by his side when he faces the adversarial press. Move over Melania, Elon will gladly clasp Trump’s hand, and Trump will gladly grab Elon’s penis.

Trump’s Victory Signals the End of American Exceptionalism

“American exceptionalism, idea that the United States of America is a unique and even morally superior country for historical, ideological, or religious reasons.

Britannica.com

The doctrine of American exceptionalism is well entrenched in the Democratic and Republic parties, they both engage in patriotic rhetoric that paints America as the “shining city on a hill,” although Republicans sing the praises of America with more zeal and belligerence.

Is America, by light of its constitution and history of defending democracy, still the favored nation destined to play a leading role in world affairs? Is the President still the Leader of the Free World?

After Donald Trump’s landslide in the popular vote and Electoral College, improving his margins in almost every demographic, it’s clear that the electorate has chosen fascism and authoritarianism over democracy and liberty.

The MAGA movement not only won the White House but retained control of the House and won a strong Senate majority. With a conservative Supreme Court, there is nothing stopping Trump from destroying democracy at home and abroad.

Trump does not respect treaties or partnerships. He doesn’t believe in a win-win foreign policy; he regards geopolitics as a zero-sum game where only America wins, and both allies and foes lose. His America First philosophy will result in both our enemies and allies putting our interests in last place.

The orange clown and his court jesters and sycophants will ensure that the world ends not with a bang or a whimper, but a sigh of regret.

It’s Anathema for a Politician to Say ‘God Willing’

Whenever a politician prefaces an intention to implement a new policy by saying “God willing” or “with God’s help” it is safe to assume that the Almighty is the last thing on their mind.

A politician invokes the Supreme Being to give the impression that their policies are in accordance with His will. The truth is that God is simply not in the equation, period. It is imperfect human beings who govern, and it is the most conniving and cynical who claim to act in the name of the Creator.

Whenever a corrupt politician, like Donald Trump, mentions Jesus it does not give his words more power, his need to refer to Jesus exposes the weakness of his arguments.

Politics is a dirty business, and a politician should never refer to a deity when making a speech or uttering any statement. That is as unseemly as a sex worker telling her client, “With God’s help I will give you the best blow job of your life.”

In a secular democracy it is anathema for a politician to invoke the name of God. I can imagine God telling hypocritical politicians: Keep my name out of your freaking mouth.

A politician shouldn’t seek help in governing by praying or reading the Bible, but by listening to his constituents.

Word to the wise: Try saying “conceivably” “hopefully” or “possibly” instead of pissing everyone off by saying “God willing.”

Evangelicals in Uproar Over John Piper’s tweet

John Piper is an evangelical theologian, retired Reformed Baptist pastor, prolific author, former chancellor of a Bible college and seminary and a podcaster. In short, he is an accomplished and serious evangelical, but he’s not a Trump sycophant, and that makes him a person of ill repute in the evangelical movement.

John Piper posted the following fairly innocuous tweet, which has caused an uproar in the evangelical community:

“Presidential election results.

Having delivered us from one evil, God now tests us with another.”

I wouldn’t like or repost Piper’s tweet because I don’t see the same kind of moral equivalence between Harris and Trump that he sees. There is no similarity between a conventional politician who believes in the democratic process, and an authoritarian who is willing to blow up the democratic process to win an election.

If the Almighty doesn’t deliver us from monsters like Hitler and Trump, it’s fair to deduce that when it comes to elections He’s not in the equation.

In a democracy it’s voters, not any deity, who determine the outcome of an election.

But at least Piper recognizes Trump as an evil, and not a God ordained messiah to make America great again.

Evangelicals are so caught up in the Trump cult, that unlike Piper they will never realize that he is the embodiment of evil, not even if his recklessness and stupidity start World War III.

If God is testing us with Trump’s victory, evangelicals have already failed the test.

We Must Stand with Transgender Women When They are Attacked by the Trump Regime

Donald Trump’s massive landslide victory is a crushing defeat for women, migrants, religious and racial minorities, and especially for the transgender community.

Armed with the Supreme Court’s immunity ruling and with the mandate he received from a conservative electorate, the second Trump administration promises to be a bleak period for transgender Americans.

Transgender women should brace themselves for attacks from the White House and a slate of anti-trans legislation from the GOP controlled House and Senate.

Trump mercilessly mocked transwomen in his hate filled MAGA rallies, and his presidential campaign spent millions on ads attacking the trans community. This anti-trans messaging has already done incalculable harm to this disenfranchised community, but the worst is yet to come.

Why all this hate directed at a marginalized community that makes up less than one percent of the population? Trump used anti-trans hysteria as a wedge issue to consolidate his support from the evangelical community.

I am not trans, gay or bisexual, but I am an American who believes that we should all be treated with love and respect. The greatness of a democracy is manifest when we treat our religious, racial, political, and sexual minorities the same as everyone else.

Today I am trans, and I call on all freedom-loving Americans to identify with the trans community, and to stand by them.

It’s time to stop crying over the devastating election results, and time to start planning how we can protect the rights of the LGBT community under the fascist Trump regime.

The Female Nude a Threat to the Patriarchy

“It never made sense why we can celebrate the body in art, but fear it in cinema.”

Demi Moore

Famous works of art throughout history in different countries and cultures celebrate the nude body. Only the pathologically prude or the sanctimoniously spiritual object to paintings or sculptures that depict nude subjects. The rest of us can look at “Birth of Venus” by Sandro Botticelli or “Lady Godiva” by John Maler Collier with artistic admiration and not prurient interest.

It is ironic that in the digital age when the most extreme expressions of hardcore porn are easily accessible on our phones, laptops and tablets, that there are still people who fear nudity in cinema, the Broadway stage and in books.

Religious fundamentalists may appreciate “Mother and Child” By Gustav Klimt in a museum but wax apoplectic if a woman is depicted breastfeeding in a movie, or horror of horrors, if she is breastfeeding in public.

Religious fundamentalists, whether they are Islamists or evangelicals, feel a religious zeal to cover up the female body regardless if it’s a work of art or a real woman with the temerity to express her freedom and autonomy in the way she dresses.

Women who “dress scantily” are sometimes raped not because they pose too much of a temptation to mean with a weak will, but because they post a threat to the patriarchal order to men with weak minds.

The female nude in popular culture shouldn’t be feared, despised or banned, but admired and celebrated.

Evangelicals Need to Stop Hating on LGBTQ Community

The LGBTQ community has made tremendous strides in recent years; most Americans no longer consider them outsiders to be feared and ostracized. According to a May 2022 Gallup poll 71% of Americans support same-sex marriage.

But evangelicals still consider sodomy the greatest sin in the world, even though Jesus never said a word about the subject.

There are just as many gays in church as there are in the secular realm, evidenced by the many ministers who have been exposed as closeted gays.

Evangelical pastors marginalize and ostracize gay people and rail against them from the pulpit because they are the one group that they feel safe preaching against.

The Bible has a lot more to say about pride, adultery, gluttony, and dozens of other sins, but if evangelical ministers preach too much against these sins, they will alienate too many people in their congregation.

Obesity is an epidemic in America but evangelical minister John Hagge who is morbidly obese never preaches against gluttony, but he never misses an opportunity to denounce gays.

Evangelicals who are so vehemently anti-gay worship Donald Trump. The same Trump who rhapsodizes about the length of Arnold Palmer’s penis, simulates performing oral sex on a microphone, and  closes his rallies by dancing to the gay anthem “YMCA.”

Evangelicals in the Bible Belt are the biggest consumers of girl-on-girl porn. They need to hit pause on their porn, stop using their bibles as a weapon, repent of their hypocrisy and recognize that hating on gays is a grievous sin.

Trump’s Garbage Truck Stunt

After comedian Tony Hinchcliffe called Puerto Rico a “floating island of garbage” in a joke during the Trump rally at Madison Square Garden on October 27, the campaign received immediate and vociferous criticism.

In a razor-close election the defection of a few Republican Puerto Rican voters in a swing state like Pennsylvania can mean the difference between winning and losing.

The Trump campaign-was in panic mode but leave it to senile gaffe machine Joe Biden to throw them a lifeline.

Asked about Hinchcliffe’s joke during a Zoom call with the Voto Latino nonprofit, Biden answered: “The only garbage I see floating out there is his supporters.”

Trump seized on the opportunity to troll Biden by renting a brand-new garbage truck, and naturally he put his name on the side of it.

The septuagenarian struggled to open the truck door, almost falling down. A 78-year-old with cognitive issues and doll hands, is ill-equipped to cos play a sanitation worker.

Trump who compared America to a garbage can, should have been tossed in the back of the truck, that’s where the garbage belongs.

Joe Biden was an idiot for calling Trump supporters “garbage”, especially after Kamala Harris had just delivered a speech at the Ellipse where she appealed to Republican voters to put the constitution over party and vote for her,

Trump and his supporters are garbage, but he was unwise to alienate half of the electorate. Leave it to bloggers to call a spade a spade.

Let’s take out the garbage on November 5.

Trump’s Lock Screen is a Pic of Himself

Your cell phone is a minicomputer that contains a gazillion bytes of data: your financial information, hundreds of photos, your browsing history, the telephone numbers of the most important people in your life, your dating profile … If a biographer unlocked your phone, he may not need to do any other research.

But even if your phone is locked, we can tell a lot about you just by looking at your lock screen. Out of the tons of pics that are stored in our phone, we can choose only one image, so naturally the shot that we select holds a lot of meaning.

I’m a misanthrope, it should come as no surprise that my pooch Princess graces my lock screen. When I pick up my phone, I want a face expressing love, empathy and loyalty looking back at me.

People usually select a photo of the person they love the most, whether it’s a lover, spouse, grandchild, parent or pet.

Donald Trump’s locked phone was seen face-up on a table during a photo-op, and it should come as no surprise to anyone that his lock screen photo is a picture of himself.

Trump is a sociopath who is incapable of empathy or loving anyone else, he loves only himself and it’s fitting that he chose an image of himself.

Voters would be well-advised to keep this in mind on election day.

Comic at Trump Madison Square Garden Rally Calls Puerto Rico ‘Floating Island of Garbage’

“Comedian Tony Hinchcliffe, one of the openers for former President Donald Trump at his Madison Square Garden rally on Sunday, referred to Puerto Rico as ‘a floating island of garbage’, part of a series of crude remarks by speakers at the highly anticipated rally.”

Forbes.com

Donald Trump held a rally in Madison Square Garden in the deep blue city of New York City, and one of his opening speakers, comic Tony Hinchcliffe, proceeding to tell an ugly anti-Puerto Rican joke in a city that over half a million Puerto Ricans call home.

The racist comedian also told this anti-Latino comment disguised as a joke:

“And these Latinos, they love making babies too. Just know that. They do. They do. There’s no pulling out. They don’t do that. They come inside. Just like they did to our country.”

Hinchcliffe is infamous for his racist wisecracks; he was dropped by his agent for hurling an anti-Asian racist slur at a fellow comic on stage. Hinchcliffe wasn’t chosen as an opening speaker in spite of his history of racism, but because of it, the organizers of this MAGA shitshow knew that his racist brand of racism would resonate with Trump supporters.

Hinchcliffe, like most of Trump’s sycophants, follow the lead of their Dear Leader, who mocks, ridicules and condemns migrants, Latinos, blacks, and other marginalized communities.

I trust that the majority of Puerto Ricans in New York City, and the over half a million Puerto Ricans in the swing state of Pennsylvania, and indeed most Americans who find the thought of a racist commander-in-chief intolerable will vote for Kamala Harris.

Donald Trump the Protector of Women

“I WILL PROTECT WOMEN AT A LEVEL NEVER SEEN BEFORE. THEY WILL BE HEALTHY, HOPEFUL, SAFE, AND SECURE.”

Donald Trump post on Truth Social

White evangelicals don’t doubt or disbelief even the craziest comments that emanate from Trump’s dementia-impaired mind, they accept every utterance of their orange messiah as the Gospel truth.

Never mind, that Trump is a pathological liar, if he was strapped to a lie detector machine, it would short-circuit.

When Trump told the women at a MAGA rally, “You will no longer have anxiety from all the problems our country has today. You will be protected, and I will be your protector”, he wasn’t met with stunned silence. Instead, the crowd, especially the women, ecstatically applauded their Lord and Protector.

I’m sure it never entered their minds that their protector is a serial adulterer who has been found guilty of rape in a civil trial, and that dozens of women claim that he sexually assaulted them.

Evangelical women are indoctrinated into believing that they need men to protect them from all the problems in society. The fair sex implicitly trust their husbands and male pastors to shield them from the vagaries of life so that they can focus on raising their children and tending to their flower gardens.

Evangelical pastors have a penchant for sexually abusing female parishioners, and this epidemic of sexual abuse is matched by an epidemic of denial.  

These evangelical women need to wake up, smell the coffee and realize that their spiritual protectors care more about their bodies than  their souls and their political protector cares more about their votes than about the issues that affect them.

Evangelicals Interrupt Harris Rally by Yelling ‘Jesus is Lord’

During a campaign rally on October 17, in La Crosse, Wisconsin, Vice President Kamala Harris was speaking about reproductive freedom when two protestors interrupted her yelling “Christ is King” and “Jesus is Lord.”

“Oh, you guys are at the wrong rally,” Harris retorted, eliciting applause and cheers from her crowd. “I think you meant to go to the smaller one down the street.”

Evangelicals have their panties in a twist, excoriating Harris for having the temerity to put the hecklers in their place. They have called her everything from Jezebel to the Antichrist.

Shouting “Jesus is Lord” is kosher when an evangelical pastor is preaching to his flock, or when the orange messiah is ranting and raving at a MAGA rally.

Silencing the Christian hecklers by advising them that they were at the wrong rally doesn’t mean that Harris is anti-Christian, it means that she won’t put up with male white evangelical troublemakers trying to silence a woman of color, especially when she’s speaking on the subject of women having sovereignty over their own bodies.

The Christian students who rudely interrupted Harris claim they were led by the Holy Spirt, but the reality is that they were led by political considerations.

An evangelical shouting “Jesus is Lord” at a Harris rally that celebrates diversity freedom and “girl power” is as welcome as a radical Islamist shouting “Allahu Akbar” at a MAGA rally that celebrates white Christian nationalism.

Trump Obsesses Over Arnold Palmer’s Huge Putter

“Arnold Palmer was all man, and I say that in all due respect to women — and I love women, but this guy, this guy, this is a guy that was all man. This man was strong and tough. And I refuse to say it, but when he took showers with the other pros, they came out of there, they said, ‘Oh my God, that’s unbelievable.'”

Donald Trump

When Trump goes off script you never know where his demented stream-of-consciousness rant will take him. He might mention “the late great Hannibal Lecter” as if he were a historical character, he might wax poetic about windmills causing cancer or go into a tirade about toilets that need a dozen times to flush.

But I never thought that Dementia Don would go off on a 12-mintute riff about the virtues of Arnold Palmer, climaxing in an off-color joke about Palmer’s huge dick.

This soliloquy praising Palmer’s manhood was totally inappropriate considering many MAGA cultists make pilgrimages to Trump rallies with their children in tow. Isn’t the Republican Party supposed to be the party of family values? Don’t his evangelical supporters worship him as a messiah figure? I don’t think that Jesus ever praised the apostle Peter for having a penis longer than the spear he used to catch fish.

Trump is a billionaire who unwinds by playing a few rounds of golf, but his story about Palmer, regardless how interesting it may have been, didn’t resonate with his blue-collar supporters who can’t afford to buy a set of golf clubs that sell for an average of a thousand bucks.

I don’t care if Palmer’s penis was as long as his putter, a presidential candidate should have the decency and discretion to keep that information to himself.

The Hate Speech that Emanates from Trump’s Sphincter-Shaped Mouth is Horrifying

Donald Trump’s sphincter-shaped mouth is terrifying, the grotesque orifice looks like it is in imminent danger of expelling a log that would clog Satan’s toilet. If I were tasked with painting the devil or an evil alien in a horror flick, I would paint them with Trump’s piehole.

But as horrifying as Trump’s maw is, the verbal diarrhea that emanates from it is even worse. The racist rhetoric, homophobia, misogyny, and sheer stupidity will drive any rational person to cover their ears and run away from the putrid source of evil beyond human comprehension.

Trump held a MAGA rally in Detroit when his microphone malfunctioned. The blowhard paced the stage for 18 minutes, an expression of exasperation on his mug.

Those who believe that God sometimes intervenes in human affairs were left wondering why the hell He doesn’t smite the belligerent asshole with muteness?

The 18 minutes of silence was a short and sweet respite from Trump’s offensive rhetoric. As soon as the microphone worked again, he doubled down on his hate speech.

The only way to permanently silence Trump’s cacophony is by defeating him in the polls. If he is humiliated and rejected by the American electorate again, maybe, just maybe, he will finally shut up and spend his remaining days golfing, cheating on his wife, and enjoying his golden showers.

Trump Loves Gay Anthem ‘YMCA’

Y.M.C.A is the unofficial anthem of the LGBTQ community; the ditty is played at Pride events, weddings, and sporting events.

It was a monster hit for the Village People, a disco group infamous for their kitschy on-stage costumes and gay-centric lyrics.

The members of the group dressed as characters from various occupations, including a cop, a biker and a cowboy. They symbolized American masculinity and macho gay-fantasy personas.

The song was released in 1978, a time when there weren’t that many public places where gays could meet and socialize. Ironically, the YMCA, a Christian organization, which featured open showers, was a clandestine meeting places for gay men.

YMCA may be a gay anthem, but it’s beloved by gays and straights, young and old, and lovers of all genres of music, even those who hate disco.

YMCA, with its lyrics extolling gay pride, is a staple at the homophobic MAGA rallies. Donald Trump always ends his rallies dancing to YMCA.

It’s a trip watching gay-hating evangelicals at Trump’s rallies dancing and singing the lyrics:

It’s fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.

It’s fun to stay at the Y.M.C.A.

They have everything,

For young men to enjoy.

If only Trump would listen to the lyrics, he might stop hatin’ on the LGBT community.

The next time Trump dances to YMCA, I hope he imitates the member of the group who dressed as the Native American, and strips down to his diapers, in lieu of the loincloth that the “Indian” wore on stage.

Female Shopper Knocked Out by Cauliflower Says Her Life is Ruined

“A female shopper was knocked unconscious by a head of cauliflower while grocery shopping — and she says the incident has ruined her life and caused her long-term health problems.”

The New York Post

It’s an inexorable law of nature that shit happens, sometimes when you least expect it. Sammi Mai, 42, was grocery shopping when she bent down to look at the bottom shelf and a head of cauliflower fell down from the top shelf and hit her noggin.

A normal non-litigious person would shrug it off and marvel at the absurdity of life. But Mai, in my opinion, pretended to be knocked unconscious and is now claiming that the incident has irrevocably ruined her life.

My reaction? Bitch, please! If a head of cauliflower fell on your ear it would cause no damage, it certainly wouldn’t leave you with a case of cauliflower ear.

Mai is being as melodramatic as Trump the drama queen who reacted as if a ballistic missile had mangled his ear when a bullet fragment grazed his ear.

Mai doesn’t have high-priced lawyers like Trump, and if she does sue, her lawsuit will get thrown out.

Donald Trump Tells Women: ‘I Will be Your Protector’

The evangelical world is a patriarchal system where the husband is the provider and protector of his family, and likewise the pastor, usually a male, is the protector of his flock.

Christian women are conditioned to defer to the wisdom of their better halves and the weaker sex depend on the men in their lives to protect them from the temptations and dangers of the world.

Therefore, evangelical women weren’t nonplussed when Donald Trump, the predator-in-chief, told them at one of his MAGA rallies:

“You will no longer be in danger. … You will no longer have anxiety from all the problems our country has today. You will be protected, and I will be your protector.”

This echoed the sentiment he expressed in his Truth Social platform:

“I WILL PROTECT WOMEN AT A LEVEL NEVER SEEN BEFORE. THEY WILL BE HEALTHY, HOPEFUL, SAFE, AND SECURE.”

Women have agency over their careers and families, they don’t need protection from the men in their lives. They certainly don’t need to be protected by a billionaire who thinks his wealth and celebrity gives him the right to grab them by the pussy.

In fact, men and women, need protection from the authoritarian sociopath who will destroy our democracy if he returns to power. The best way to protect ourselves from Trump is by voting for Kamala Harris.