Author: robertpaulreyes

White Evangelicals are an Affront to God and Anathema to our Democracy

“The Bible, especially the King James Version, is great literature, a moral authority for a troubled world, and evangelicals consider is the inerrant Word of God.

Anybody who`s read the Bible will concur that it`s a literary masterpiece, and most Westerners will agree that it provides solid moral guidance, but most people don`t believe that it`s the literal Word of God because they are outraged that evangelicals have used scripture to justify racial segregation, misogyny and even slavery.

There are certain go-to Biblical verses that preachers spouted- the curse of Ham or the mark of Cain – to rationalize white superiority and even the slavery of blacks. Even today, especially in the South, evangelicals still use scripture to justify racial segregation.

It`s not the KKK member in full regalia that`s the greatest threat to our democracy, it`s the evangelical brandishing a Bible. Trump, a brazen unapologetic racist, has the support of thousands of KKK members and Nazis, but it`s the millions of evangelicals who put him in the White House.

The Trump administration is infested with evangelicals who hold views that are antithetical to a secular democracy. These evangelicals in Trump`s cabinet feel emboldened to proudly proclaim their homophobic, racist and misogynist views.

Take Karen Pence for example, she teaches at a Christian school that discriminates against gays and lesbians. Pence wraps herself in the Bible to defend her anti-gay views, and her teaching position in a virulently anti-gay school.

True Christians must reclaim their religion from the likes of Karen Pence; Jesus Christ the manifestation end embodiment of the Word of God preached tolerance, equality and peace, and he never uttered a single word against homosexuality.

II Timothy 2:5

Study to shew thyself approved unto God, a workman that needeth not to be ashamed, rightly dividing the word of truth.

Biblical verses, taken out of context, can be used to justify everything from genocide to homophobia to the inferiority of women to slavery.

Religion shouldn`t be exempt from criticism and even ridicule, it`s incumbent upon Christians and non-Christians alike to criticize the white evangelicals who are making a mockery of Christianity and democracy.

Compilation of Cat Videos to Play at a Movie House Near You

“Seventy minutes of cute cat videos may be some people`s idea of hell, but they`re not the target audience for `CatVideoFest,` a celebration of feline belovedness coming to Baltimore`s Landmark Theatres Harbor East on March 11.

The compilation is culled from direct submissions as well as the internet (if you`ve ever been on YouTube, you know how pervasive videos of adorable cat antics are) and other sources.

Part of the proceeds from `CatVideoFest,` which is playing at movie theaters throughout the country in February and March, will be earmarked for local cat charities, shelters and animal welfare organizations.”

Baltimore Sun

I rarely go to the movies because movie theaters attract humans – loud, inconsiderate, dirty, smelly humans.

I prefer to watch movies on Netflix or Amazon Prime in the privacy of my home with my cats napping on my lap.

However I might be enticed to go to the local multiplex to see “CatVideoFest,” I`ve seen thousands of cat videos online, but I`ve never seen a cat video on a huge screen.

The only drawback is that I can`t take my kitties with me, and of course I will have to put up with the company of humans for more than an hour.

Read more:
http://www.baltimoresun.com/features/baltimore-insider-blog/bs-fe-catfest-20190205-story.html

Donald Trump’s State of the Union Speech Tie Afflicted With Peyronie’s Disease

Moron

Donald Trump`s signature sartorial look is an absurdly long red tie. The Donald rarely buttons his jacket, he wants everyone to behold the amazing length of his tie.

You don`t have to be a rocket scientist, a stable genius or a fashionista to know that Trump`s long tie is compensation for his puny presidential pecker.

Trump triumphantly walked into the House chamber to deliver his State of the Union speech with his tie suffering from Peyronie`s disease. Nobody had the nerve to tell him that his tie was bent, and he delivered his address with his tie askew.

I once had a boss who walked around for hours with his zipper wide open, everybody hated his guts, and nobody wanted to spare him humiliation.

I`m surprised Mike Pence didn`t intentionally make his tie crooked to visually express solidarity with his boss.

It was appropriate and fitting that the most crooked president in history gave one of the most important speeches of his tenure wearing a crooked tie.

I don`t believe in accidents, I believe in a Supreme Being who is in control of the tiniest details. The Almighty Himself bent Trump`s tie to express how much He despises the short-fingered vulgarian and his white evangelical supporters.

Donald Trump Invites Bullied Joshua Trump,11, to State of the Union Speech

Bully-in-Chief

“There will be many Trumps in the House chamber for the president`s State of the Union address Tuesday night – but one Trump is not in the family. He`s Joshua Trump, an 11-year-old boy from Delaware who was bullied over the last name he shares with the president. President Trump and first lady Melania Trump invited the sixth grader to attend as their guest.”

CBS News

Indeed, there will be many Trumps in the House chamber for the president`s State of the Union address Tuesday night, but Tiffany Trump, the so-called bimbo of the Trump clan, has exercised remarkable wisdom by rarely appearing in public with her notorious family, and I doubt she will be in attendance tonight.

One Trump who`s not in the family, Joshua Trump, is the special guest of President Trump and first lady Melania Trump. He`ll be there by virtue of being bullied over the surname he shares with the bully-in-chief.

The boy was bullied over his name so much that for a while his parents homeschooled him. When he`s seen on nationwide TV tonight as the special guest of the short-fingered vulgarian, not only will he be continued to be bullied by his classmates, but he will be bullied online by millions.

Inviting Joshua Trump to the State of the Union speech makes as much sense as a teacher presenting a certificate of cleanliness, politeness and good grammar to a bullied student. I predict that Joshua will be homeschooled until he graduates from high school.

Shame on the Trumps, especially Melania, for using the child in such a cynical way. Melania has made anti-bullying her pet crusade, surely there`s a special place reserved in hell for such a hypocrite.

Read More:

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/state-of-the-union-2019-president-trump-invites-joshua-trump-delaware-boy-who-was-bullied-for-his-name-to-speech-tonight/

Woman Batters Boyfriend With Frozen Pork Chop

Deadly Weapon

“A Florida Woman is facing a domestic battery charge after allegedly clobbering her boyfriend in the face with a frozen pork chop during a dispute Friday night in their residence.

Cops allege that Jennifer Brassard, 48, and her beau were `engaged in a verbal argument` around 9:45 PM when Brassard `threw a frozen pork chop at the victim.` The pork chop, a criminal complaint notes, struck the man below the left eye, causing a half-inch laceration.

After getting hit with the pork chop, the victim fled the couple`s home.”

The Smoking Gun

When life gives you lemons, make lemonade.

When life curses you with a girlfriend who throws a frozen pork chop at your face, put the pork chop on your face to promote healing.

Then threaten to kick the wench to the curb if she ever acts out violently again, and finally demand she cook your pork chop. I love me some pork chops, and a pork chop should never go to waste.

But never, under any circumstances, run away like a terrified school girl when your old lady chunks a pork chop at you. This coward`s man card should be confiscated and returned only when he manages to grow a pair.

The wimp wasn`t identified by the police to protect his reputation, and the violent girlfriend was jailed on a domestic battery charge.

Read More:

http://thesmokinggun.com/documents/florida/pork-chop-battery-780129

Top Ten Signs Ralph Northam is a Racist

Coonman

If you don`t remember if you`re the individual dressed as a Klansman or the individual in blackface in a photograph, you just might be a racist.

If your nickname is “Coonman,” you just might be a racist.

If you`re such an expert at applying blackface that you know it`s difficult to wipe shoe polish from your face, you just might be a racist.

When the White Supremacist-in-chief calls your actions “unforgiveable,” you just might be a racist.

When your longsuffering wife has to restrain you from moonwalking in a press conference, you just might be a racist.

When almost every Democrat in the United States calls on you to resign, you just might be a racist.

When you refuse to resign because the African-American Lt. Governor would take your place, you just might be a racist.

When you have a shit eating grin on your face when you`re arguing that you`re not a racist, you must might be a racist.

When you can`t keep your story straight, you just might be a dumb racist.

When you`re more likely to be fitted for a KKK robe than a judge`s robe, you must might be a racist.

White House Official: Donald Trump’s Orange Complexion a Result of Good Genes

Orange Racist

A senior administration official told the New York Times that Donald Trump`s complexion is the result of good genes.

The official spoke to the Times on the condition of anonymity, apparently he was too embarrassed to be credited with such an outrageous lie.

I must concede that there`s a remote chance that Trump`s orange complexion may be the result of a mutant gene, or perhaps his real father is an Oompa-Loompa.

You don`t have to be a stable genius or a dermatologist to deduce that Trump`s pumpkin-colored face is the result of spending hours on a tanning bed. The bright white half-moons under his eyes are a dead giveaway, can anyone say tanning goggles?

In her tell-all book former aide Omarosa Manigualt Newman said that her boss used a tanning bed often.

The default mode of every Trump administration official is to lie, every statement or tweet that emanates from the White House must be taken with a grain of salt.

Of course Trump`s orange complexion can be attributed to good genes, and he`s also in excellent physical health, of sound mind, and he`s blessed with the greatest brain in history.

Evangelical Christianity a Greater Threat to Democracy Than the Satanic Temple

The Satanic Temple is a nontheistic religious and political activist group based in Salem, Massachusetts. The Temple has chapters in 13 US states and in Canada. The group uses Satanic imagery to promote egalitarianism, social justice, and the separation of church and state.

Wikipedia

Evangelical Christianity is a greater threat to democracy and all that it entails (free speech, religious liberty, social justice) than the Satanic Temple.

Most Christians consider my opening statement blasphemous and they will immediately dismiss me as a godless liberal. But I pray that most of you will extend me the courtesy of reading my entire essay.

The leader of the Satanic Temple, Lucien Greaves, considers Mike Pence and his evangelical brethren an existential threat to our democracy and I wholeheartedly concur. The group uses Satanic imagery to counter supernaturalism and tradition-based superstitions and to promote social justice and the separation of church and state.

The Satanic Temple doesn`t believe in the existence of a personal Satan or any supernatural being for that matter. They don`t worship Satan or sacrifice babies to the Dark Lord.

They embrace the name Satan to counter supernaturalism and archaic tradition-based superstitions and to promote religious liberty and the separation of church and state.

Mike Pence, on the other hand, embraces the name of Jesus Christ to promote the undemocratic principles of homophobia, misogyny and theocracy disguised as Republican nationalism.

The Satanic Temple is a nontheistic religious and political activist organization and we have nothing to fear from them. They don`t advocate for Satanic prayers in public schools, or teaching the Satanic Bible in public schools.

No Satanist would ever endorse the racist, homophobic, misogynist and undemocratic Trump administration, while the vast majority of white evangelicals endorse Trump without any reservations.

I would never join the Satanic Temple, I question the judgement and wisdom of an organization that embraces a name that is the universal symbol of evil.

I align myself with the Jesus of the Gospels, who preached peace and ministered to social outcasts. I consider the Satanic Temple an ally in fighting bigotry and theocracy, and I look on white evangelicals as my bitter foes. They`ve done more than Satanists to discredit the true religion of peace, love and brotherhood of man: Christianity.

The Coolest Cat on the Internet

Humans go to desperate and expensive lengths to try to look cool: Designer clothes, bling, fancy hair-do, and of course cool shades.

But a cat is chill AF without trying, a feline even looks cool taking a dump in the litter box.

I`ve posted tons of pics of my kitties on Facebook, and I never have to pose them in a manner that makes them look cool. They are naturally cool, all I have to do is snap the pic.

Click the link at the bottom of the page to see photos and a video of a cool cat lying on his back on his owner`s backpack in a bank in Brazil. In crime-ridden Brazil humans can`t afford to be chill in a bank because a bank robbery make break out at any time. But a cat`s default mode is chill, and they are chill anytime and anyplace.

The only complaint I have is that the cat is wearing sunglasses! Talk about overkill, the kitty doesn`t need shades to look cool.

Am I right, or what?

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6644917/Cat-shades-reclines-owners-backpack-Rio-bank-foyer.html

In a Risk Averse Age Harley-Davidson is an Anachronism

Its loud and powerful engine, bad boy image, and penchant of Harley owners for customizing their bikes symbolizes the brutal strength, freedom and individuality that made America the greatest nation on Earth.

Harley- Davidson is an iconic American brand, it`s as American as Mom and apple pie.

Harley- Davidson has been on a downward spiral for decades, but it`s losing significantly more speed under the Trump admiration. The motorcycle company on Tuesday said its profits were erased by slumping sales and Trump`s tariffs.

Baby boomers are the core demographic for Harley, and their customers are downsizing from hogs to Hoverrounds. Harley needs to thinks outside the box and introduce a new model for baby-boomers, featuring chrome training wheels.

Unfortunately, millennials were raised by hippies to be risk-adverse, and these pansies will never give up their mopeds, skateboards and hoverboards in favor of a macho motorcycle.

In an age where climate control cultists are in power, and wimps expect to go through life without any cuts or bruises there is simply no place for Harley-Davidson.

The last cowboy rode off into the sunset over a century ago, and in the near future the last modern day cowboy will ride his steel horse into the night.

Donald Trump Tweets Support for Bible Literacy Classes in Public Schools

Noted Bible Scholar

“President Donald Trump is endorsing a variety of Bible Literacy classes that have been introduced by state lawmakers across the country, including in Virginia.

`Numerous states introducing Bible Literacy classes, giving students the option of studying the Bible,` Trump wrote in a Monday morning tweet. `Starting to make a turn back? Great!`”

WHSV

Donald Trump who went to Liberty University, a prominent Christian evangelical university, to deliver a speech in which he cited “Two Corinthians 3: 17” is endorsing Bible Literacy classes – how rich!

I realize most of my readers are heathen so let me explain that for a Christian to refer to 2 Corinthians as “Two Corinthians” is equivalent to somebody who pretends to be a physics major saying that he can see black holes when he puts on his x-ray glasses.

If anyone needs to take a course in Bible literacy it`s Trump, perhaps Mike Pence can extricate his head from Trump`s rectum long enough to teach him a thing or two about the Bible.

The vice president and members of the Cabinet hold a weekly circle jerk disguised as a Bible study, Trump would join these wankers if he really cared about Bible literacy.

The Bible should be anathema in public schools, although the King James Version of the Bible is a literary masterpiece, and it could be taught as an optional course for students interested in English literature.

The only time Trump cracks open the Bible is when he uses it as a cover to hide from his wife the fact that he`s actually reading Penthouse Forum.

Read More:

https://www.whsv.com/content/news/Pres-Trump-tweets-in-support-of-Bible-literacy-classes-504983032.html

Hillary Clinton is Too Old, Too Corrupt, Too Moderate and Too Unlikeable to Run for President

Loathsome

In an effort to break the ultimate glass ceiling in 2016 Hillary Clinton`s reputation was shattered. Hillary should have become a hermit after the humiliation of losing to the most unqualified presidential candidate in history, but instead she` had a book tour, hit the lecture circuit, and now she even has the unmitigated gall of hinting at another presidential run.

In two short years Donald Trump has almost destroyed our democracy, but I give him credit for destroying the Bush and Clinton dynasties.

There is zero chance that Jeb Bush will run for president again, and there`s no room in the Democratic Party for the likes of Hillary. There is a vanguard of credible Democratic female candidates for president (Rep. Tulsi Gabbard, Sen. Kirsten Gillibrand, Sen. Elizabeth Warren and Sen. Kamala Harris) who are unencumbered by the moral corruption that Hillary embodies and represents.

Hillary is too old, too corrupt, too unlikable and too moderate for today`s Democratic Party. It`s not just this old curmudgeon who`s written her off, according to the NH Journal poll 55 percent of New Hampshire Democrats believe that Sen. Warren best represents the Democratic Party, Democratic-Socialist Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez came in second at 28 percent. A minuscule 17 percent said that Hillary was the best representation of the current party.

I`m a baby boomer so perhaps I won`t be accused of being ageist when I say that Hillary, Bernie Sanders, Joe Biden and Donald Trump are too freaking old to be president.

For God`s sake let`s pass on the torch to a Kamala Harris or a Kirsten Gillibrand. Biden and Sanders can serve as elder statesmen nurturing the new generation of Democratic candidates. Hillary can just disappear, we don`t need to hear a peep from her.

Melania Trump is as Clueless as Donald Trump is Cruel

Clueless Trophy Wife

Our work in the East wing continues into 2019 with online safety, fighting opioid abuse & supporting the well-being of children everywhere! #BeBest

Melania Trump Tweet

Melania is like a madam of a brothel who promises to fight human trafficking by donating five percent of her income to charities that fight the sexual exploitation of children.

I notice Melania dropped the anti-bullying part of her #BeBest campaign, I guess even she can no longer stomach the incongruity and hypocrisy of the spouse of the biggest bully in the world being an anti-bullying spokesperson.

If Melania really cared about the well-being of children everywhere, she could start by publicly calling out her husband for his ruthless and inhumane policies of separating children from their parents at our southern border, and housing migrant children in cages.

Bitch please, just take a short stroll from the East wing to the West wing and have a little talk with the president. Tell him to stop wasting precious time and financial resources trying to get his vanity wall built, and concentrate on fighting the opioid epidemic.

There are millions of Americans who would love to have just two minutes with Trump, and Melania who lives with him wastes her time posting ludicrous tweets and issuing statements supporting her racist, cruel and vindictive husband.

Anyone Who Wears a MAGA Cap Should Pay a Price

Racist Kid

Donald Trump`s red “Make America Great Again” (MAGA) hats are ubiquitous, you can`t go to a ballpark, parade or any public gathering without seeing scores of them.

But because something is popular it doesn`t mean that it`s innocuous or harmless; I would argue that the popularity of the MAGA hats are a symbol of the rise of racism and the decline of democracy.

The MAGA hats have become a hot-button topic, in the wake of the racially charged confrontation near Washington, D.C,`s Lincoln Memorial. Alyssa Milano famously called the caps the modern-day hoods of the Klu Klux Klan.

The standoff involving a group of male students from Covington Catholic High School, who were wearing MAGA hats, and Nathan Phillips, a Native American elder, has come to symbolize the racial divide.

During the 2016 presidential campaign the MAGA hats may have been a neutral symbol, but now they are synonymous with the blatantly racist Trump administration.

The MAGA hat amplifies the racist message that America was great in the 40`s and 50`s when America was predominantly white, and that it can be great again if we deport Mexican, Central American and Haitian immigrants and other riffraff.

Those MAGA kids (Is there a more horrifying phrase?) might as well been wearing KKK regalia while jeering the Native American elder.

You can`t wear a KKK hood in public without facing a visceral backlash, you risk being verbally if not physically assaulted.

Nobody should feel comfortable or safe wearing a MAGA hat, as an Hispanic I take it as a personal affront whenever I see a racist wearing a MAGA cap.

I don`t advocate violence, but I`m surprised that there haven`t been any incidents of MAGA cap-wearing racists assaulted by minorities. To wear a MAGA hat is an intolerable provocation, Trump supporters might as well wear a T-Shirt that says: I hate coons and spicks.

We can start making America Great Again by making it crystal clear that it`s not OK to wear A MAGA hat, and that if you wear one in public, you will pay a price.

Adorable Service Dog Cuddles With Cinderella at Disneyland

Cinderella

“Elijah, a Labrador and Golden Retriever mix and service dog in training, vacationed at Disneyland in Anaheim, California, with his handler in December.

The 1-year-old pup was thrilled when he got the opportunity to meet Cinderella at the Royal Hall tourist attraction at the park.

He immediately walked up to Cinderella and dropped into her lap.”

ABC News

Disneyland is a Magical Kingdom where children gorge on fast food, wait for hours to ride a roller coaster for a minute, and hug adults dressed as their favorite cartoon characters.

Enthralled tots struggle to break free from their parents so they can shake hands with Mickey Mouse or hug Cinderella.

Everything in Disneyland is geared to making children happy, but Elijah a one-year-old puppy was as happy as any child when he vacationed with his handler in the popular amusement park.

Watch as Elijah walks up to Cinderella and cuddles in her lap, oh to be a child again! Cinderella is kind of hot, this adult wouldn`t mind cuddling with her for a few moments.

Link to video and photos of adorable puppy:

https://abcnews.go.com/GMA/Living/service-dog-met-cinderella-disneyland-stop-cuddling/story?id=60543999

Nancy Pelosi Has Spine of Steel Unlike Jell-O Man Paul Ryan! Take Heed Trump!

Strong Leader

Nancy Pelosi isn`t a physically imposing figure, the septuagenarian is of small stature, and she speaks in a trembling hoarse whisper. If she didn`t have to worry about how the public perceives her, she would probably dye her hair blue and use a walker to get around.

But looks can be deceiving, when Pelosi speaks people listen. The Speaker of the House has an ironclad control of her caucus, and any Democratic representative who doesn`t bend to her wishes will find himself or herself broken in pieces.

For the first two years of his administration Trump didn`t face any resistance to his controversial policies or racist comments from the Republican Speaker of the House. Paul Ryan was focused on passing tax reform legislation that benefited the wealthy and screwed the poor, and as long as Trump was onboard with his singular goal he overlooked his myriad moral failings.

Apparently Trump didn`t get the memo that the new sheriff has a spine of steel, and she`s going to fight him tooth and nail. Pelosi has questioned Trump`s manhood, called out his lies to his face, and banned him from delivering the State of the Union Speech in Congress until he ends his shutdown.

Trump needs to get it through his thick head that he`s met his match, and he would be well-advised to treat Pelosi as an equal. Pelosi isn`t going to give in to Trump`s temper tantrums, he needs to give up his pipe dream of building a wall and end his shutdown.

Like Eva Braun Sarah Huckabee Sanders Should Stay With Her Boss to the Bitter End

Liar

“Donald Trump has revealed he has told his press secretary Sarah Sanders not to bother with the traditional White House daily press briefing.

The US president posted on Twitter on Tuesday, suggesting that the press is unfair to his combative press secretary.

`The reason Sarah Sanders does not go to the `podium` much anymore is that the press covers her so rudely & inaccurately, in particular certain members of the press,` Mr. Trump wrote.

Independent

The White House daily press briefing is a misnomer, insomuch as Sanders held only one briefing in November and December, and none so far this year.

I rarely agree with anything Trump says or does, but I concur wholeheartedly that Sanders shouldn`t bother holding any more press briefings.

Sanders approaches the podium like a Catholic nun circa 1970 approaches her classroom of middle school students, with a surly expression just daring anyone to ask her a question of substance.

With her wonky eye and her eye shadow smeared on her pasty face Sanders is a repulsive figure, but even a homely person can be endearing if she would only smile. But Sanders is as stingy with her smiles as she is with the truth, and I doubt she has a single friend in the press corps.

The Washington Post reporter James Downie perfectly described Sanders as “lazily mendacious,” she doesn`t even make an effort to tell a convincing lie.

Sanders is in an impossible situation, how can anyone be a convincing spokesperson for a pathological liar? The answer is of course that`s a mission impossible, nobody with a shred of integrity and decency would agree to be the spokesperson for a vulgar, racist, know-nothing chronic liar.

Like Hitler`s longtime mistress Eva Braun, Sanders should stay with her boss to the bitter end. Like Braun she should avoid the spotlight, we are as sick and tired of her as we are of her boss.

Read More:
https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/trump-sarah-huckabee-sanders-twitter-press-secretary-white-house-briefing-journalists-a8740906.html

Racist Donald Trump Has the Gall to Visit Martin Luther King Jr. Monument

Racist Moron

“Trump laid a wreath Monday morning at the foot of the memorial alongside Vice President Mike Pence before quickly returning to his motorcade.

“It`s a great day. A beautiful day. Thank you for being here. Appreciate it,” Trump told reporters as he stood before the large statue of King.

The President`s visit to the memorial site — which is overseen by the National Park Service — came on the 31st day of the government shutdown, which has left the National Park Service unfunded.”

CNN

Donald Trump and Mike Pence stood before the Martin Luther King Jr. memorial for about two minutes before making their getaway on the presidential motorcade.

Had Trump made a visit to a Confederate memorial he would have stayed there at least two hours because no doubt he would have been surrounded by very fine people.

The stable genius also left quickly out of resentment that there will never be a Trump monument in the National Mall.

The trip was unannounced because had people known that the brazen racist had the gall to attend the monument of the civil rights leader, he would have been meet with furious protesters.

I won`t even address the issue of Pence comparing Trump to King, that makes my blood boil.

Hope I hope and pray that Trump will be impeached and removed from office before we celebrate Martin Luther King`s holiday again.

Read More:

https://www.cnn.com/2019/01/21/politics/trump-mlk-day/index.html

Screw Politically-Correct Stand-up Comics! I’ll Take Louis CK Over Sofie Hagen!

A comedy club is a consecrated temple where political-correctness is anathema, and the lingua franca is profanity, bringing people of disparate backgrounds together in an orgy of laughter.

Asswipes who are easily triggered have no business darkening the door of a comedy club, they dishonor the memory of giants like Lenny Bruce and Richard Pryor who have nurtured our souls with their socially-conscious obscene material.

Sacred cows are slaughtered on the stage, and racial epithets shower the audience, and audience members leaves the temple more enlightened human beings.

Never in the history of comedy has the audience broken out in a spontaneous chorus of Kumbaya or We Shall Overcome, a comedy club is a welcoming but tough place that the weak of mind and spirit should avoid like the plague.

A heckler interrupting a stand-up comic is par for the course, and the crowd never urges the comic to hug it out with the heckler. To the contrary, any comic worth his salt will rip the heckler a sparkling new a-hole.

Louis CK is a pervert and a sexual predator for whacking off in front of unsuspecting females, but he doesn`t break any laws with his profane and outrageous comedy riffs. So he made fun of the Parkland Shooting activists, cry me a fuc*en river, as I`ve previously mentioned there are no scared cows in the comedic realm.

However let me stress that what`s kosher in a comedy club is verboten in any other venue. Politicians for example may be clowns but they aren`t stand-up comics, and if they make a joke at the expense of a racial or religious minority, they should rightly be condemned.

A wholesome comic is an oxymoron, it`s impossible to be funny without being profane and politically-incorrect. With all due respect, screw politically-correct comics and the wankers who clamor for such toothless and spineless comedy.

Donald Trump’s Racist Claim About Prayer Rugs Found at the Border

Racist

“On Friday, Donald Trump tweeted the headline to a recent Washington Examiner story, which read: Border rancher we`ve found prayer rugs out here. It`s unreal. As the headline suggests, the story is about a New Mexico rancher who claims to have seen prayer rugs-typically used by observers of Islam-near the U.S.-Mexico border. After the headline, Trump added this: People coming across the Southern Border from many countries, some of which would be a big surprise.

Vanity Fair

In Donald Trump`s announcement speech he set a tone for his campaign and for his administration:

When Mexico sends its people, they`re not sending their best. They`re not sending you. They`re not sending you. They`re sending people that have lots of problems and they`re bringing those problems with us. They`re bringing drugs, they`re bringing crime, they`re rapists, and some, I assume, are good people.”

Trump`s anti-Hispanic immigration rhetoric has been a constant drumbeat during his administration. He ramped up the demonization of brown immigrants in the weeks before the midterm elections. Who can forget the infamous web video — produced for the Trump campaign – featuring the notorious Mexican national, Louis Bracamontes, who was convicted of killing two California deputies?

Trump is once again ratcheting up his anti-immigration rhetoric in a desperate attempt to convince the American public that he is right in refusing to agree to a compromise to fund the government that doesn`t include five billion for his beloved wall.

But this time Trump is adding anti-Muslim hate speech to his vitriolic mix of racism. The racist-in-chief tweeted a headline from the ultraconservative Washington Examiner that quoted a border rancher claiming to have found prayer rugs. Of course Trump realizes that his racist base will conflate Muslim prayer rugs with Islamic terrorists.

The Washington Examiner story is totally bogus, the rancher quoted in the article isn`t identified and she didn`t provide any photographic or video evidence of her magical prayer rugs. Those prayer rugs are as real as Trump`s proposed 30-foot concrete wall between Mexico and the United States.

We mustn`t allow Trump`s noxious anti-immigrant rhetoric to persuade us that we need a wall, and I hope the Democrats remain steadfast and won`t give him a dime for his accursed wall.

Read More:
https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2019/01/donald-trump-sicario

JANUARY 2019 ARCHIVES PAGE TWO:

January 2019 Archives Page Two

Why Did Donald Trump Have a Bandage on His Hand?

Wanker

“President Donald Trump is often called thin-skinned. It`s usually not meant literally.

But the back of Trump`s right hand was covered with an adhesive bandage during a Thursday trip to McAllen, Texas, with blood visibly seeping through the dressing. His hand was similarly bandaged again on Monday as he departed for a trip to New Orleans.

Armchair medics studying photos that circulated online this week leapt to dramatic conclusions. But the White House said on Tuesday that Trump sustained the injury while playing with his 12-year-old son.”

Politico

Americans are fascinated by Donald Trump`s grotesquely small hands, we are so familiar with the topography of his hands that we notice every liver spot. Naturally, we noticed that his right hand was covered with an adhesive bandage.

The White House claims that Trump sustained the injury while playing with his 12-year-old son, but we have learned to take every statement by the Trump administration with a grain of salt.

I don`t think Trump would recognize his young son, and I doubt he has ever played with him.

Social media has weighed in with dramatics reasons for his bandaged hand. So what on Earth caused Trump`s injury? Here are my more credible explanations:

Melania scratched his loathsome hand when he tried to cop a feel. Trump would be well-advised to stick to groping Ivanka.

It wasn`t Barron that Trump was roughhousing with but Mike Pence, and Pence accidentally scratched him during their sex play.

The bandage covers a boil. Every time Trump tells one thousand new lies the Almighty smites him with a boil, and his fat ass is already completely covered with boils.

The bandage covers a bite mark. Kellyanne Conway was sucking on Trump`s hand to drink his blood, believe it or not, without his blood she would look even more loathsome and decrepit.

But enough of Trump`s hand, it`s another part of his anatomy that I would love to injure, namely delivering a solid kick to his fat behind.

https://www.politico.com/story/2019/01/15/trump-health-bloody-hand-bandage-1102245

Goose the Captain Marvel Cat is the Real Superhero

Superhero Kitty

“The official Captain Marvel character posters dropped on Wednesday, Jan. 16, and the gang was all there: Larson`s Captain Marvel, Jude Law`s Starforce Leader, Annette Bening`s mystery character, Gemma Chan`s Minn-Erva, and of course, Goose, whose poster really is purr-fection. The orange tabby is full-on mugging for the camera because he`s a professional. Seriously, Olivia the dog, eat your heart out.

Twitter`s real takeaway from this poster, though, was that this cat means business and might be the key to saving the Avengers. “The attention Marvel has been giving to this cat,” Twitter user @asshryver_ wrote, “leads me to believe that Goose the cat will defeat Thanos.”

Bustle

Superhero movies are to cinema what paint-by-numbers paintings are to art. The only superhero flick I liked was Guardians of the Galaxy 2, and only because of the adorable Baby Groot.

I know zilch about Captain Marvel or the DC Comics universe, but if Goose the Cat is in the latest Captain Marvel movie, I will watch it when it opens in March of this year.

I don`t know if Goose has any superhero powers, but he has charisma up the wazoo. Only Halle Barry as Catwoman can match his animal magnetism!

The Goose Poster is purr-fection!

Must See Video! Toddler Not Impressed When She Meets Baby Bro For First Time!

Bundle of Joy?

During the 2012 Olympic Games in London, United States gymnast McKayla performed a nearly flawless vault, leading most experts to believe she would win the gold medal for the competition. Maroney ended up taking the silver medal, and while on the winner`s podium, she was photographed making a scowling expression. The photograph became an international meme, and Maroney`s “I`m not impressed” expression was ubiquitous on the Internet for months and years. As great an impact as the gifted gymnast had on her sport, her greater impact was on our culture at large, her “McKayla is not impressed face,” has become a defining moment for the digital age.

Ella, a toddler, doesn`t know McKayla from her droopy drawers, and she can barely walk, let alone perform gymnastics, but she channeled McKayla when she was introduced to her baby brother for the first time.

Ella was certainly not impressed when a woman hands her her baby brother, she barley budges and looks off into the far distance. I`m not saying Ella is a psychopath, but I wouldn`t be surprised if this nascent sibling rivalry ends with the death of the clueless baby.

The proud dad writes that Ella`s reaction is priceless, no the reaction when one day he checks on the infant sleeping in his crib, and finds him dead will be priceless.

I empathize with Ella, I love puppies, kittens and butterflies but babies leave me cold. If a proud mother makes the mistake of handing me her baby, I will also look at it as if I`m holding a sack of crap.

Arab Christians in Israel Go Bonkers Over Sculpture of Ronald McDonald on a Cross

“Hundreds of Arab Christian demonstrators clashed with police in Haifa on Friday over a museum`s display of a sculpture depicting Ronald McDonald, the mascot of the fast-food giant, on a cross, amid calls to remove the artwork that some have called offensive.

Police said a few hundred protesters tried to force their way into the Haifa Museum of Art during the demonstration and that three officers were injured by rocks hurled at them.

The Times of Israel

The Holy Land is a tinderbox of religious passions, the slightest perceived provocation can result in a holy conflagration.

If the sculpture of Ronald McDonald on a cross was exhibited at the Museum of Modern Art in New York City even the most devout Christian would shrug, but in Israel it ignites sectarian violence.

Protesting art because it`s offensive makes as much sense as protesting streetwalkers because they are scantily attired. Great art, not implying that the Ronald McDonald sculpture is a masterpiece, is often offensive. Art often takes us out of our comfort zone, and makes us ponder difficult issues.

A superficial reaction to Finnish artist Jani Leinonen artwork is that he`s suggesting that Jesus is as much a clown and a fictional character as the McDonald`s mascot.

A more nuanced interpretation is that Jesus Christ, the sinless One, died for our sins, but Ronald McDonald the mascot of a greedy international corporation is crucified for hastening the death of millions around the world. You don`t need to be a physician or a nutritionist to realize that fast food leads to obesity and premature death.

Some prosperity Gospel ministers believe that Jesus didn`t just die for or sins, but that he died for diseases as well, and all you need to do is to claim healing in the name of Jesus.

Ronald McDonald didn`t take upon himself every disease in the world, quite the opposite he promotes diseases by shilling for McDonald`s.

In my humble opinion the Ronald McDonald sculpture is a serious work of art, and it merits contemplation and appreciation. The Arab Christians should chill the hell out.

Link to pic of Ronald McDonald on a cross:

https://www.timesofisrael.com/arab-christians-in-violent-clash-with-police-in-haifa-over-mcjesus-sculpture/

Donald Trump Vs Joe Biden is a Vomit-Inducing Nightmare

Groper of little girls

“President Donald Trump called Joe Biden weak and said he is not worried about a potential challenge from the former vice president in the 2020 presidential race, during a phone interview with Fox News` Jeanine Pirro Saturday night.”

CNN

At this early stage of the 2020 presidential campaign former Vice President Joe Biden is the leading contender for the Democratic nomination. But considering Biden is 76 and Trump is 72, is doubtful that these surly septuagenarians will live long enough to battle it out in 2020.

There is no love lost between Biden and Trump, on occasion their rhetoric has included threats of physical confrontation. In March 2018 during a speech at the University of Miami Biden said:

They asked me if I`d like to debate this gentleman, and I said `no.` I said, `If we were in high school, I`d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him.` “

Trump, the infamous counterpuncher, immediately responded on Twitter:

Crazy Joe Biden is trying to act like a tough guy. Actually, he is weak, both mentally and physically, and yet he threatens me, for the second time, with physical assault. He doesn`t know me, but he would go down fast and hard, crying all the way. Don`t threaten people Joe!

I would pay a small fortune to watch a pay-per-view death match between Crazy Joe Biden and Sociopath Donald Trump.

They would of course require a five minute break in between rounds to change their diapers and for oxygen therapy.

Trump would plant prepubescent girls on the front row to distract the notorious fondler of little girls, and Biden would seat strippers and porn stars to distract the notorious sexual predator.

Even though Trump is younger than Biden he can`t go the distance because he`s so damn fat, he would have to engineer a way to dispatch his opponent quickly.

Trump is an expert at trash talking, and he could attempt to trigger a stroke or a heart attack by attacking Biden verbally throughout the match. Some examples:

Hey Joe, your few gaffes have cost you dearly, but my loyal base finds it endearing when I spit out gaffes like a machine gun on Twitter and during my speeches.

Hey Joe, sorry your son died of terminal brain cancer, but at least he didn`t have a reputation of groping little girls.

Sorry for the mean nature of these taunts, but I`m channeling the short-fingered vulgarian.

If there`s a God in heaven Biden would die of a heart attack as a result of Trump`s cruel barbs, and Trump would die from sheer physical exhaustion.

The last thing I want to see is Trump and Biden slug it out in the 2020 presidential election.