trump

Trump Talks About His Relationship With God

“A viewer asked Trump during a fawning Fox & Friends interview over the weekend, ‘What’s your relationship with God like, and how do you pray?’

‘OK, so I think it is good,’ Trump replied. ‘I do very well with the evangelicals. I love the evangelicals. And I have more people saying they pray for me ― I can’t even believe it. They are so committed, and they are so believing. They say, ‘Sir, you’re going to be OK. I pray for you every night.’ I mean, everybody, almost ― I can’t say everybody, but almost everybody that sees me, they say it.’”

Yahoo News

The first think that grabs my attention is that Trump supporters are so gullible and clueless that they think that a sociopath who’s a serial sexual assaulter of women, a pathological liar, a failed insurrectionist and a wannabe dictator has a relationship with God.

I bet the Fox News viewer who posed this fawning and ridiculous question is a white evangelical who thinks his Orange Messiah has a direct line to the Almighty.

Trump gushed over how believing (re: gullible) evangelicals are and how committed they are to him. They accept every absurdity, obscenity and lie that emanates from his sphincter-shaped mouth as the Gospel truth.

Trump is an egotistical narcissist who doesn’t believe in God, any belief in a deity or a code of ethics would conflict with his achieve success by any means necessary mentality.

I give Trump credit for deflecting the question, and not even pretending that he prays or has a relationship with God.

White evangelicals will focus on his claim that he loves them, and to them that’s proof that he’s God’s anointed.

Runaway Trump Bus on Way to MAGA Rally Crashes into Utility Pole

A bus on its way to a Trump rally in Staten Island crashed into a utility pole. The vehicle was festooned with religious signs and messages including a sign that said “Trust Jesus.”

I hate to disappoint my readers, but the bus was empty; the parked bus rolled down until it crashed into the pole.

If a runaway Trump bus was headed straight to a pole, I wonder if the Trump cultists would cry out to Jesus or Trump to save them.

Jesus is kind and merciful and He’s dropping a hint that maybe people who call themselves Christians shouldn’t attend a blasphemous, obscene and downright evil MAGA rally.

But I am sure that the Trump cultists just made other plans to attend the rally, neither hell nor high water nor a divine message will keep them from attending a satanic MAGA rally.

I guess Jesus didn’t take the wheel.

This accident, that coincidentally happened after Trump was declared guilty, is a perfect metaphor for the Trump campaign.

What Community Service Would be Best for Trump?

Former president Donald Trump was found guilty by a jury of 34 counts of falsifying business records for concealing hush money paid to adult film star Stormy Daniels before the 2016 presidential election.

The twice-impeached former president has a long history of evading taxes, failing to pay contractors, lying on financial statements to secure loans and sexually assaulting women, but this is his first criminal conviction.

Even though the real estate tycoon faces a possible maximum sentence of four years imprisonment for each of the 34 counts against him, it’s highly unlikely he will spend a day behind bars.

Given that this is his first criminal conviction and that he was found guilty of low-level non-violent felonies he is more likely to receive probation or community service. What type of court-ordered community service should the convict be ordered to perform?

Work at an Animal Shelter

Everything that Trump touches turns to shit, and he is responsible for polluting social media with tons of bullshit, therefore it is only right that he cleans up shit for a change.

Build a House for Habitat for Humanity

Trump is a builder and real estate developer who’s built luxurious condos and resorts for the wealthy and powerful, it’s only right that he helps build a modest home for a poor family for a change. It would be refreshing to see him channel Jimmy Carter instead of Richard Nixon, for a change.

Work as an Assistant for an Immigrant Landscaper

Trump demonizes undocumented workers as rapists, thieves and murderers, it’s only right that he work side-by-side with an immigrant so he can learn first-hand how hard-working, industrious and entrepreneurial most of them are.

Work as a Caregiver for Joe Biden

Even though Trump suffers from his own cognitive issues he constantly makes fun of Biden’s dementia. It’s only right that he be sentenced to change Bidens diapers, clean his dentures, and sing him bedtime stories.

If Trump is found guilty in his other pending criminal cases he will most likely be sentenced to prison, but in the meantime what community service do you think he deserves?

We Need to Reclaim American Flag from Trump and his MAGA Cultists

Before Trump became president in 2016 the American flag was a symbol of patriotism and freedom, and even Democrats proudly flew the flag without worrying that their neighbors might think that they were professing allegiance to Republican ideology.

But Trump and his MAGA cultists have turned our great flag into a symbol of allegiance to him and the MAGA movement. Old Glory is the battle flag of Trump and his insurrectionists; Trump rallies feature enormous American flags, and all sorts of merchandise depicting Trump and the flag are hawked at his rallies.

When I see the authoritarian orange sociopath hugging, kissing and caressing the American flag it makes me want to throw up.

Even though Lynchburg is a conservative city in the Bible Belt since Donald Trump became president in 2016, there have been significantly less homeowners flying American flags. Even mainstream Republicans who are not part of the MAGA cult are reluctant to display the Stars and Stripes.

I’m a progressive who hates how Trump has damaged the GOP in particular and democracy in general, but I still fly the American flag on my front porch because I’m so grateful to live in the greatest democracy in the world. I have a Black Lives Matter banner in my front yard, so my neighbors will not mistake me for a Trump supporter.

This Memorial Day American flags were flying proudly in public buildings and private residences in every neighborhood in Lynchburg.

I hope that Trump will be soundly defeated, and that all Americans, and not just Trump sycophants, will once again proudly display the American flag every day, not just on Memorial Day or Independence Day.

Shame on Nikki Haley for Endorsing Trump

Anthony Scaramucci, who for a New York minute served as White House communications director in the Trump Administration, criticized Nikki Haley for saying she would support the former president over President Biden. Her exact words:

“Trump has not been perfect on these policies. I’ve made that clear, many, many times. But Biden has been a catastrophe. So, I will be voting for Trump.”

This wasn’t exactly a ringing endorsement, in fact it barely qualifies as an endorsement, but she should have kept her mouth shut and preserved her dignity.

I feel no need to kiss the ring, Haley said in February before suspending her primary campaign; now she’s puckering her lips getting ready to kiss his ass. Now she has implicitly endorsed the sociopath that just a few months ago she described as “too old, too chaotic, too unhinged and too prone to temper tantrums to be president again.”

Haley states that Trump has not been perfect on his policies, but it’s not his policies so much as his criminal indictments hanging over his head, his racist and immoral behavior, and his authoritarian tendencies that renders him unqualified to serve as president.

Scaramucci was one of just a few principled Republicans who criticized Haley’s timid endorsement of Trump. Adam Kinzinger: “Not a surprise, but, pathetic.” Mark Sanderford: “What you have here is somebody obviously wanting to be relevant in 2028.”

It’s Trump, not Biden who’s a catastrophe and Haley’s weak endorsement of Trump isn’t enough for the MAGA cultists, and they will never forgive her for running against their messiah in the first place.

Classified Documents Found in Trump’s Bedroom Months After Mar-a-Lago Raid

Newly released court filings revealed that Donald Trump’s lawyers found classified documents in his bedroom months after the 2022 FBI raid of Mar-a-Lago. Most of the newspaper articles and cable news reported this disclosure as “shocking.”

I hardly find it shocking that Trump believes that he is a above the law, and that he has such disdain for the FBI and the rule of law that he kept classified documents in his bedroom.

I would be shocked if the MAGA messiah kept a Bible on the nightstand next to his bed. Trump is old school and he probably keeps a stained copy of Hustler magazine within easy reach of his creepy little hands.

I would be shocked if Melania was discovered on Trump’s bed, it’s probably been decades since he’s enjoyed carnal relations with this trophy wife. She’d rather be dead than endure the degradation of having her fat ass husband grope her breasts with his disgusting doll hands or have his puny presidential pecker anywhere near her vagina.

I’d be shocked if clean bedsheets were discovered on the former president’s bed. Can you imagine what his bedsheets look like after Trump has been on his bed for just a few moments? The linen would be defiled by his fake orange tan, blond hair dye, and not to mention that the incontinent septuagenarian would leave the sheets smudged with feces and drenched with urine.

I would be surprised if a chess set was found in Trum p’s bedroom, at this point he doesn’t have the cognitive ability to play Tic-Tac-Toe.

More classified document found in Trump’s bedroom? I don’t think anyone is surprised.

The Debate Between Sleepy Joe and Drowsy Don Will be a Snoozefest

Let’s get ready to rumble! President Joe Biden, 81, and former President Donald Trump, 77, have agreed to a pair of debates. The two ageing pugilists have agreed to a debate on June 27, hosted by CNN, and another on Sept. 10 hosted by ABC.

Don’t expect a Lincoln-Douglas oratory masterclass when these two senile combatants take the stage, it will be more like a clash between Mr. Magoo and Scrooge McDuck.

The debates will feature just the two presidential candidates and the moderators without the rowdy in-person audience that makes even the most boring verbal duel interesting. This will be a disadvantage for Trump because he feeds off the energy of his cultists. The Sleepy Joe vs Drowsy Don debate will be a snoozefest.

Robert F. Kennedy, Jr was not invited to the debate; I guess a conspiracy theorist who had part of his brain eaten by a worm would only serve to make the verbal confrontation between the old geezers more confusing.

The only way this debate will be interesting is if Joe Biden stumbles walking up to the stage or if he can’t find his lectern without assistance. There’s also the strong probability that Trump will enliven the verbal match with a bout of flatulence.

I would caution Biden to be prepared for low blows, there is no telling what the vulgar and vindictive Trump will say to rattle his opponent. And I would caution Trump not to interrupt Biden if he regales the viewing audience with an anecdote about Corn Pop, let Biden be Biden and he will lose the debate.

Trump is Past His Expiration Date

“Michael Cohen testified today that Trump once asked him how long he’d be single if Melania were to leave him and said, ‘How long do you think I’d be on the market for? Not long.’ On the market?

‘Coincidentally, ‘not long’ is how Stormy described it.’ — STEPHEN COLBERT

‘But it’s true — he would be off the market soon. I mean, he is clearly past his expiration date.’ — STEPHEN COLBERT”

The New York Times

Trump is past his expiration date as far as being viable marriage material. The narcissist bragged that if Melania left him over his extramarital affairs, he wouldn’t be in the market for long. Trump isn’t exactly a good catch for a gold-digger, he has mountains of debt, his future residence may be a federal penitentiary, he’s persona non grata in most social circles, and not to mention that he’s butt ugly. Imagine a gold-digger calculating whether it’s worth it to marry a billionaire with a mouth that looks like a sphincter. She’d probably faint the first time he tried to french kiss her.

Trump is also past his expiration date when it comes to his physical condition. Like a sirloin steak that’s past its expiration and has been dyed to make it appear fresh, the septuagenarian with the dyed blond wispy hair and the orange complexion reeks to high heaven. Is it any surprise that lawyers, journalists, court reporters and other court officials have complained that he smells, and not just when he’s farting. Trump is physically deteriorating, witness his double chin, his balding pate, and unsteady gate.

Needless to say, Trump’s brain is past its expiration date. The buffoon can’t complete a sentence, let alone a speech. He doesn’t make sense regardless how much weed you smoke or alcohol you drink.

Trump is past his expiration date when it comes to his neo-Nazi, authoritarian ideology. His fascist rhetoric may have been all the rage in Germany in the 30’s and early 40’s, but it’s past its expiration date in 21st century America. His far-right Nationalist ideology may resonate with his evangelical base, but they are a minority in our secular democracy.

Trump is past his expiration when it comes to being a viable presidential candidate, it’s time for voters to kick him to the curb.

What People Remember the Most About Trump’s Administration is His Execrable Behavior

“Two of the biggest U.S. news events in decades, the Covid pandemic and the Jan. 6 storming of the Capitol, are seldom the first thing on people’s minds when it comes to their memories of the Trump administration, for example, according to an April Times/Siena survey of registered voters nationwide.

When asked to describe the one thing they remembered most from Donald J. Trump’s presidency, only 5 percent of respondents referred to Jan. 6, and only 4 percent to Covid.”

The New York Times

The COVID pandemic was a catastrophe that decimated our economy, shuttered our churches, schools and entertainment venues, infected most Americans and killed over one million of us.

Trump’s response to this tragedy was ineffectual from the beginning when he tried to dismiss the pandemic as no different from the flu. He disregarded the advice of the CDC and his own health officials, promoted quack cures like bleach and ivermectin, and generally tried to downplay the crisis for political expediency.

Post pandemic thanks to the efficacy of vaccines and the implementation of social mitigation measures COVID is now a seasonal virus like the flu, and most Americans seem to have forgotten Trump’s abysmal response to the pandemic.

The January 6 Insurrection was a failed coup and an existential threat to our democracy, and former president Donald Trump was the instigator and enabler of the insurrectionists who stormed the Capitol.

The insurrectionists are languishing in jails in D.C. and most Americans have forgotten that Trump was the chief insurrectionist.

Historians will devote volumes to Trump’s mishandling of the COVID threat and to his attempt to undermine our democracy, but according to the Times poll what most Americans remember about the Trump administration are the economy and his behavior.

It’s about the economy stupid, and Trump’s behavior is execrable, but as the 2024 general election quickly approaches, we mustn’t forget Trump’s botched response to COVID or his contempt for our democracy.

America managed to survive Trump’s administration, but if he regains power, it may mean the end to our democracy.

Mad Respect for Stormy Daniels for Surviving her Tryst with the King of Smelly Farts, Trump

Porn star Stormy Daniels took the witness stand on Tuesday at Donald Trump’s hush-money criminal trial and described in lurid detail her 2006 one-night-stand with the disgraced former president.

For the first time in over a decade the adult film actor, who exuded confidence and honesty, met face-to-face with the pathological liar who is seeking one again to become president in spite of the 91 indictments hanging over his head.

I read the transcript of Daniel’s testimony, and I won’t subject you to a retelling of this sordid sexual encounter; I don’t want to be liable for your therapy bills.

I will focus only on the episode when the narcissist Trump showed her a magazine featuring himself on the cover, leading Stormy to remark: “Someone should spank you with that.” Per the porn star, “He gave me the look that dared me to do it, so I swatted him with it right on the butt.”

Sometimes porn actors are forced to perform humiliating and degrading acts, but even perverse acts like bestiality are not as soul-killing as spanking an incontinent old man who is susceptible to out-of-control farting.

if you spank Trump at best, it will provoke a fart and at worst the smack might unleash a torrent of diarrhea. I have nothing but respect and sympathy for Stormy for having survived her tryst with the deviant with a mushroom-shaped puny pecker and the big old farting butt.

‘Von ShitzinPants’ Perfect Nickname for Donald Trump

Michael Cohen’s, Donald Trump’s former lawyer-cum fixer, scatological nickname for his ex-boss broke the internet and shattered the spirts of the former president when social media posts in which he called him “Von ShitzinPants” were read aloud during a contempt of court hearing.

The social media posts were read aloud by Trump’s own lawyer, Todd Blanche. He was trying to argue that it was unfair for a gag order to prevent Trump from talking smack about witnesses when they could say anything about him.

Trump christens his political opponents with silly monikers that amuse elementary schoolyard bullies, simpletons, and MAGA cultists.

It was extremely satisfying to witness the pompous fool get a taste of his own medicine, and to hear his own lawyer say Von ShitzinPants was the cherry on the cake.

Von ShitzinPants is the perfect nickname for Trump, considering he has a penchant for farting in the courtroom. It’s also common knowledge that the incontinent septuagenarian wears diapers.

When Trump isn’t shitting in his pants, verbal diarrhea is streaming from his sphincter-shaped mouth.

I died laughing when I read about this courtroom drama; Trump couldn’t say or do shit when he heard himself being referred to as Von ShitzinPants.

Why Hasn’t There Been a Major Hollywood Trump Biopic?

Donald Trump is the most famous, or should I say infamous, person in the world. His name recognition is right up there with Jesus, Santa Claus and the devil himself. So why in God’s name hasn’t there been a biopic depicting his career as a politician since he descended the Trump Tower golden escalator to announce his presidential candidacy?

Trump’s political career has all the ingredients for a Hollywood movie blockbuster: financial shenanigans, criminal indictments, impeachments, unbridled greed, political corruption and sex in all of its deviant variations:  extramarital affairs, golden showers, a dalliance with a porn star, sexual harassment, a protagonist with a mushroom shaped micro-penis and even allegations of rape of a minor.

The Trump life story is a film begging to be made, so why isn’t there a Trump biopic?

To begin with, you just can’t find an actor to play Trump straight out of central casting, he is a one-of-a-kind physical abomination. Pray tell where is a Hollywood casting director going to locate a septuagenarian with raccoon eyes, an orange complexion, a triple chin, a hairdo that resembles cotton candy after Russian hookers have peed on it, a mouth that resembles a sphincter, grotesque doll hands, and a beer belly that looks like it’s ready to explode. The film will require nude scenes, and exactly where can you track down an actor with a mushroom-shaped minuscule pecker.

Also, producers are afraid to make a movie about Trump because of his MAGA followers. They worship Trump as their messiah, and they won’t be pleased without anything else than a hagiography. You think Muslims are upset when the Prophet Mohammad is depicted in an unfavorable light? Imagine if Trump is accurately portrayed as a dangerous sociopath, his supporters would burn down every movie theatre that plays the Trump biopic.

We may have to wait until Trump is dead before a Trump movie is released.

Trump Farted in Courtroom During Hush-Money Trial

“What I’m hearing from credible sources is that Donald Trump is actually farting in the courtroom… I’m hearing it from actual credible people that as he’s kind of falling asleep, he’s actually passing gas and that his lawyers are really struggling with the smell.”

This quote from Ben Meiselas, the founder of the virulently anti-Trump political action committee Meidas Touch, has gone viral spreading faster than a fart in a room with no ventilation.

This noxious allegation has been debunked by Snopes, the premier fact-checking website, but there may be a whiff of truth in it. After all, it’s widely believed that Trump is incontinent. If the fat pig can’t control his bowels, it stands to reason he can’t stop himself from farting like a loose cannon.

The judge in Trump’s hush money trial has placed him under a gag order, stopping the blowhard with the sphincter-shaped mouth from attacking witnesses in his trial. Unfortunately, the judge is incapable of stopping him from polluting the courtroom with his deadly gas.

Even when Trump is napping, he is still a menace to society, gagging his own lawyers with his indiscriminate flatulence.  

The narcissist sociopath is always tooting his own horn, even when he’s asleep in court he’s still tooting away, poisoning the courtroom with his smelly toots.

Even when he’s unconscious Trump is still poisoning the atmosphere, America won’t be rid of this ill wind until he’s dead and gone.

Trump Falls Asleep in Court with Sphincter-Shaped Mouth Agape

“Maggie Haberman, a Senior Political Correspondent for the New York Times, reported today to CNN that Trump “appeared to be asleep. His head would fall down… He didn’t pay attention to a note his lawyer passed him. His jaw kept falling on his chest and his mouth kept going slack.”

Los Angeles Magazine

Donald Trump the septuagenarian former president who calls octogenarian President Joe Biden “Sleepy Joe” can’t seem to keep his eyes open in court.

If I was in court for a speeding violation, I would be so ashamed, contrite and nervous that I wouldn’t have any problems keeping my eyes open.

But Trump who is charged with 34 counts of falsifying business records in the first degree, in an attempt to hide hush-money payments to porn star Stormy Daniels is so accustomed to being indicted that he just can’t stay awake in court.

According to Haberman Trump’s jaw kept falling on his chest and his sphincter-shaped mouth was agape. That is such a disturbing pornographic image, that would even keep Stormy awake at night.

I hope that the sketch artists who are present in the courtroom will depict Trump accurately with his sphincter-shaped mouth open and drool oozing down his triple chin.

Maybe at the conclusion of the trial when Trump is found guilty, he’ll finally wake up.

Trump’s MAGA Rallies End with an Altar Call

An altar call is a tradition in most evangelical churches. After the pastor finishes his sermon, he issues an altar call. While the choir quietly sings an invitational hymn like “Just as I am”, the pastor beseeches his congregation to bow their heads, close their eyes, and pray for the Holy Spirit to harvest souls. The minister will plead with church members to come to the altar to rededicate their lives to Jesus and with unbelievers to walk down the aisle and make a public profession of faith. Even if only one or two souls respond to the altar car, it’s perceived as validation that the Almighty has blessed the service.

Trump’s MAGA rallies have always commenced with a local evangelical pastor saying a benediction, but lately his rallies now conclude with an altar call MAGA style. With music softly playing in the background, the orange messiah delivers a ten-minute finale that evokes an evangelical altar call.

Many MAGA cultists even bow their heads during Trump’s altar call, the only difference between a church altar call and a MAGA altar call is that Trump doesn’t ask his followers to come forward and rededicate their lives to him.

But I’m persuaded that after an hour of hearing their orange Savior rail against migrants, racial minorities and the LGBT community, Trump’s disciples leave his rallies inspired and motivated to spread his Gospel of hatred and violence.

If Biden Debates Trump He Will Lose the Debate and the Election

Donald Trump is a boxing fan, and he usually has a ringside seat at major boxing events. Even though Trump weighs almost 300 pounds, never exercises, wears diapers instead of boxing trunks, and has tiny doll hands, he views himself as a pugilist. Trump styles himself as a counterpuncher, but actually he’s more of a down-puncher. He strikes out at subordinates and people who he deems incapable of punching back.

The orange pig will never enter a boxing ring, but the next best thing for him is the debate stage. Trump is dying to debate the physically frail and cognitively challenged Joe Biden.

Last month, the combatative politician used his Truth Social platform to dare Biden to step onto the debate stage with him, declaring that he’s prepared to debate the Democratic incumbent “ANYTIME, ANYWHRE, ANYPLACE.” The former president expressed a desire to see ten debates, rather than the usual three general election debates.

Even though Trump is just as senile as Biden he would demolish, destroy and disembowel the octogenarian president. At the first verbal jab Biden’s dentures would go flying out, he would lose his train of thought and maybe control of his bowels as well.

There is no way that Biden can compete against an adversary who breaks all the rules, talks over his opponents and lands more low blows than legitimate punches.

If Biden is foolish enough to debate Trump, he will lose the debate and the election.

Happy Easter and Transgender Day of Visibility

President Joe Biden is facing withering criticism from Donald Trump and his evangelical enablers for proclaiming March 31 as “Transgender Day of Visibility.”

This is faux outrage is exceedingly disingenuous for evangelicals are well aware that “Transgender Day of Visibility” is an annual event that is always celebrated on March 31.

Biden is a devout Catholic who always makes a public display of observing Easter and Christmas, he would be loath to do anything that would diminish any Christian holiday.

I don’t consider religiosity a virtue, and a president shouldn’t observe, commemorate, publicly celebrate or even acknowledge any religious holiday. The separation between church and state is sacrosanct, and I find it deeply offensive whenever any politician tries to curry favor with the electorate by invoking the name of God.

America is a secular democracy, and on March 31, 2024 we are free to celebrate Easter, Transgender Day of Visibility, or the pagan springtime goddess Eostre. Or maybe you are like most Americans who simply consider today just another weekend to eat a chocolate egg, relax and have a good time before we return to work.

Trump Threatens Biden with Image of President Hog-tied on Pickup Truck

As a dog returns to his own vomit, and a pig wallows in the mire after having been washed, Donald Trump returns to the cesspool of violent imagery whenever he feels a need to rile up his base.

And with President Joe Biden seeing a rise in his polls following his State of the Union speech, a desperate Trump posted a video on his Truth Social platform depicting Biden hog-tied on the bed of a pickup truck festooned with Trump 2024 insignia.

The twice-impeached and four times indicted sociopath regularly incites political violence, and it can have real world consequences, or have we already forgotten the failed insurrection of January 6, 2021? Therefore, it’s incumbent upon reporters and bloggers to put Trump on blast every time he resorts to violent rhetoric.

This latest disturbing image was calculated to appeal to the orange messiah’s redneck base, after all only his cultists read the garbage that he posts on his social media platform.

The offensive post didn’t depict a businessman in a Toyota Prius running over Biden, it showed Biden hog-tied in the tailgate of a pickup truck. I’m sure there are multitudes of MAGA fanatics who fantasize about having Biden hogtied in the back of their Ford 150 truck.

This vile Trump post may push one of his disciples over the edge. Enough is enough! I call on responsible Republican pundits and GOP leaders to denounce Trump’s violent imagery.

Trump Hawks ‘God Bless the USA Bibles’

“The former president took to Truth Social Tuesday to urge his supporters to buy the God Bless the USA Bible — a $59.99 Bible inspired by country singer Lee Greenwood’s song.

‘Happy Holy Week! Let’s Make America Pray Again. As we lead into Good Friday and Easter, I encourage you to get a copy of the God Bless the USA Bible,’ Trump posted, linking to a website featuring the books.”

Politico

In 2019 Donald Trump, the antichrist personified, autographed Bibles during a tour of tornado-devastated communities in Alabama. If the narcissist defiled Bibles by signing them with his Sharpie, I wouldn’t be surprised if he hired Russian hookers to urinate on them, and then sell them to his evangelical supporters as “the Golden Showers edition of God’s Word.”

Everything Trump touches turns to shit, but to his disciples he’s King Midas, and they believe everything he touches is worth its weight in gold.

I believe the “God Bless the USA Bible” will sell out, Trump’s followers equate patriotism with Christianity, and they will buy the cursed Bibles knowing it will fill their messiah’s coffers.

“God bless the USA Bible”? I would feel more comfortable buying a “God damn the USA Bible”, especially now as evangelicals cite the scriptures as a justification to support Israel’s genocidal war against Palestine.

Trump Doesn’t Deserve a Second Term, He Deserves a Life Term Behind Bars

When reality star and pompous businessman Donald Trump descended the golden escalator in his garish Fifth Avenue building to the perfunctory applause of curious onlookers and paid actors, he opened his trap and toxic racist rhetoric emanated from his sphincter-shaped orifice.

Who can forget his infamous remarks in which he labeled Mexican migrants rapists, criminals and drug dealers. Trump is a master at projection, and he projected his fraudulent criminal and sexual predatory behavior on the hardworking Mexican undocumented workers in search of the American Dream.

Needless to say, immigrants are model citizens, they are loathe to break any laws of their new home country, lest it hinders them from obtaining a green card, and one day citizenship.

Sadly, when America elects its Republican and Democratic presidential nominees, all too often they don’t select the best candidates. Witness the physically frail and senile Democratic nominee, Joe Biden and the morbidly obese and senile racist, Donald Trump.

Mexican immigrants aren’t the criminals, the twice-impeached and four times indicted Trump who is facing 91 criminal charges is one of the most notorious criminals to ever seek a political office.

Hispanic immigrants aren’t the rapists, it’s Trump, the serial sexual predator, who was found guilty of rape in a civil trial.

Brown and black immigrants aren’t the ones who have a problem with drugs, it was Trump’s White House that was awash in uppers, antidepressants and anti-anxiety medications. That should come as no surprise to anyone, how else could aides and staffers survive working in such a chaotic and corrupt administration?

Trump doesn’t deserve a second term; he deserves a life term behind bars.

F Donald Trump

Evangelicals’ public rhetoric and private conversation has always been hateful and dismissive of religious and racial minorities, liberals and towards anyone who doesn’t subscribe to their Medieval religious beliefs.

Pre-Trump they never allowed their odious speech to degenerate into obscenities and vulgar expression. In fact, they were so averse to profanities that they were always quick to demand that a “parental advisor warning” be slapped on any album with explicit content or even just a few curse words.

But since they adopted Donald Trump, the stinking pile of human shit, as their new messiah, they praise God for every obscenity that emanates from his sphincter-shaped mouth and they no longer think it’s a sin to sprinkle their conversation with four-letter words. Evangelicals find it almost impossible not to use cuss words when demonizing racial minorities, immigrants and the LGBT community.

Well, I find it impossible not to use dirty words when talking about the dirtiest mother fucker who ever entered the realm of politics, Donald Trump.

Fuck Donald Trump, fuck every church that supports him, and fuck white evangelicals who sacrilegiously worship the trick-ass, mother-fucken wanker.

Trump vs Biden? Just Shoot Me!

It’s not even spring and the world’s greatest democracy has now chosen the presidential nominees for the two major parties: Republican Donald Trump and Democrat Joe Biden.

The GOP and the Democratic Party have a stranglehold on the presidential selection process, and there’s zero chance that a Third-Party candidate will emerge to seriously compete against these despicable and senile candidates.

This tragic state of American politics can best be demonstrated in a metaphor:

Imagine that both parties are holding political events in Las Vegas at the same time, and naturally all the brothels are doing thriving business. You walk into a cathouse, and the Madam tells you that only two past their prime working girls are available:

Sleepy Joanna: she has a second job doing grannie porn videos in order to make ends meet. She’s emaciated and you fear she may have a heart attack doing the dirty deed, and you wonder about your legal liability. It’s likely that she will forget your name, and blurt out the wrong name when she pretends to climax.

Dorky Donna: she has a second job doing BBW porn in order to pay the bills. She’s fat as a pig and you fear that she may suffer a stroke while you’re knocking boots. You’re certain that the narcissist cow will scream her own name when she comes, and who wants to put up with that shit? 

The madam of the house of ill repute is waiting for you to make your decision, and you finally decide that you’d rather put your privates through a meat grinder than have sex with either of those sorry prostitutes.

Who am I voting for: The senile Biden is better than the senile human excrement Trump, but maybe I should just kill myself.

Pathological Liar Trump Calls Himself ‘Honest John’

In the early morning hours of Tuesday when all decent and honest people are sleeping, Donald Trump had the unmitigated gall to post this on his Truth Social media platform:

“For the good of our now failing Nation, and in order to inform the American people of what is going on in our Country, we must immediately have a full scale debate between Crooked Joe and Honest Don. I’m ready to go, ANY TIME, ANY PLACE!”

Trump the pathological liar, the mendacious miscreant who told over 30,000 lies during his administration christened himself with the moniker “Honest Don”

If a used car salesman at “Honest John’s Auto Emporium” tells you the rusted heap he’s trying to sell you is in cherry condition, if the Madam at the brothel tells you that the new working girl with dead eyes and heroin track marks all over her arms is a virgin, and if “Honest Don” known to everybody else as a lying piece of shit tells you anything, don’t believe a word they say.

It’s fair to label Joe Biden “Sleepy Joe”, “Skeleton Joe” or “Hospice Joe”, but he’s basically a decent person and it’s a disservice to refer to him as “Crooked Joe”

However, it would be fair to call the twice-impeached, twice divorced and 4 times indicted former president Trump “Crooked Don.”

If there is a debate between Biden, 81, and Trump, 77 there should be an AI powered Truth-O-Meter on stage to call out Trump in real time every time he tells a whopper.

And there should be a device on the floor under Biden that delivers an electrical shock every time he starts nodding off or goes off on a tangent about Corn Pop or some other nonsense.

Dementia Joe or “Honest Don” is going to be the next president. We’re Fucked.

When Racist Trump Mistakes Obama for Biden, You Know He’s Senile

I support Joe Biden, 81, over Donald Trump, 77; the Democrat presidential candidate who resembles Mr. Magoo is preferrable over the Republican presidential candidate who resembles a Joe Stalin or an Adolph Hitler.

I will stipulate that President Joe Biden is suffering from severe cognitive issues, the octogenarian has suffered more mental lapses than Carter has little pills.

I will also stipulate that Trump is a blatant racist, he has dog whistled more times in the last eight years than a typical NBA referee has blown whistles during a season.

Even most Democrats will concede that Biden is senile AF, but Republicans are loathe to admit that Trump is senile as all get out.

How senile is Trump? He is so senile that the raging racist has repeatedly mistaken Barak Obama for Joe Biden. During a recent campaign speech in Richmond, VA he said this:

“Shortly after we win the presidency, I will have the horrible war between Russia and Ukraine settled. I know them both very well, and we will restore peace through strength. Get that war settled. It’s a bad war. And Putin has so little respect for Obama that he’s starting to throw around the nuclear word.”

Trump hates Obama simply because he’s black, and when the unrepentant racist mistakes a black former president for the current white president, you know he belongs in a rest home.

Sickening Spectacle: Franklin Graham Embraces Trump at the Border

Part time evangelist and full time Donald Trump fluffer Franklin Graham posted a pic of himself embracing Trump with the caption: “Look who I ran into at the border today! Donald Trump was a great encouragement to many here.”

Franklin is being disingenuous; he didn’t just happen to “run into Trump” at the border. The former president is protected by a phalanx of Secret Service Agents and nobody meets him without making prior arrangements.

Franklin is visiting border towns because it’s an election year, and he wants to amplify Trump’s anti-immigrant message.

The televangelist is preaching a false message by declaring that “Trump was a great encouragement to many here.” Trump’s hateful rhetoric may have been encouraging to his supporters who came to hear his speech, but it was anathema to the predominately Hispanic community of Eagle Pass.

Instead of embracing the blatant racist at the border, he should have been there to welcome migrants who just crossed the border. There are dozens of pro-immigration Biblical verses, including Leviticus 19:34:

 “The alien who resides with you shall be to you as the citizen among you; you shall love the alien as yourself, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt: I am the Lord your God.”

If Jesus returned to Earth, he would deport Franklin and Trump to Mexico, or maybe he would send them directly to hell, and he would welcome all the migrants with open and loving arms.