Lo and Behold: God’s Anointed Trump Holds Up a Bible Outside a Church Fulfilling Scripture

Today I witnessed a holy scene that resonated with my white evangelical soul and reaffirmed my belief that Donald Trump is a humble servant of God and a mighty prophet anointed by the Almighty to Make America a Great White Nation Again.

After the President declared himself a “Law and Order President” in the Rose Garden and promised to restore order in our nation divided by Satan’s army of liberals, he mobilized the police and members of the military to clear out a peaceful protest by pacifists and snowflakes so he could make a pilgrimage to a nearby church.

The Lord gave the stable genius the wisdom to hold up a small Bible, God knows that our Dear Leader wouldn’t have been able to hold a giant Bible with his tiny hand without toppling over.

This heavenly photo-op made the angels in heaven rejoice and his saints below cream their paints in holy ecstasy. The stain in my groin area testifies to my righteousness and loyalty to God’s anointed.

This photo-op fulfills Scripture: Lo and behold the women’s moist undergarments and the men’s soiled white tighties testified that the Almighty had elevated a White Messiah to the greatest office in the land.

I’m compelled to state that is a satirical piece, because Trump’s white evangelical supporters are so freaking stupid.  In reality I’m a Latino who follows the teachings of Jesus Christ, and is horrified how Trump is making a mockery out of Christianity and destroying our democracy.

We Must Socially Distance Ourselves From Donald Trump

I protect myself from contracting the coronavirus by practicing social distancing, wearing a mask in public and washing my hands thoroughly and frequently. I’m a senior citizen with several underlying medical conditions and it’s imperative that I take the threat seriously.

Donald Trump is more toxic and deadly than the COVID-19 virus and even someone like me who despises him and doesn’t believe a word he says, must socially distance himself for him to preserve his sanity.

In practical terms that means that I don’t follow the stable genius on Twitter nor do I read his tweets. Trump’s tweets aren’t informative, educational or inspiring, on the contrary they’re vulgar, divisive and disingenuous.

That also means I don’t watch the president’s propaganda arm, Fox News. They amplify Trump’s lies and justify his incoherent policies and repugnant behavior. I prefer to watch cable news networks that practice fact-based journalism and hold Trump accountable for his myriad mistakes and lies.

If I succumb to the coronavirus because I was lax in practicing social distancing and washing my hands frequently, I have only myself to blame. If I become infected with Trump’s xenophobia, racism, misogyny and just plain evil because I read his tweets and watched his fluffers on Fox News, I have only myself to blame.

For the love of God, until Trump is kicked to the curb on November, socially distance yourself from the toxic monster.

James Woods: ‘Trump Loves America More Than Any President in my Lifetime’

“Donald Trump is a rough individual. He is vain, insensitive and raw. But he loves America more than any President in my lifetime.”

James Woods Hollywood actor best known in recent years for kissing Trump’s ass

Donald Trump is anathema in Hollywood as he is most of America and he receives precious few compliments from celebrities. Even Trump’s diehard supporters can’t bring themselves to praise him unreservedly and Woods heaped praise on him but not before acknowledging that his hero is vain insensitive and raw.

Trump retweeted Woods’ tweet, stating:

“I think that is a great compliment. Thank you, James!”

Only a sociopath egomaniac authoritarian leader would consider being called vain, insensitive and raw a compliment. Trump considers being self-centered, insensitive to the needs of his constituents and raw or vulgar good qualities.

It’s axiomatic that Trump doesn’t love America, he loves only his base and he loves them only because they support him unreservedly.

The truth is that Trump loves red state America i.e. rednecks, white evangelicals, misogynists and racists more than any president in history.

In his first, and hopefully last term, in office Trump has shown his true colors so much that he has been embraced by Nazis, white supremacists and morons like James Wood.

I’m praying that Woods and his ilk are in a minority and that Joe Biden will be victorious in November.

Trump Wants to Paint the Border Wall Black

“President Donald Trump has requested the border wall, one of his signature campaign promises, be painted black, a proposal that could cost hundreds of millions of dollars, according to a new report.

The Washington Post reported Wednesday Trump had ordered the border wall to be painted black in order to make it look more imposing and to make it too hot to touch during the summer.

According to estimates obtained by the Post, the cost of painting the wall black would range from $500 million for acrylic paint to over $3 billion for a powder coating on the wall.

USA Today

Nero fiddled while Rome burned and if it weren’t political suicide Trump would be golfing while the coronavirus pandemic destroys our economy and kills tens of thousands of Americans.

Since he can’t indulge in his favorite pastime the stable genius is pondering painting the border wall black to make it look more imposing and to make it too hot to touch during the summer.

At a time then millions of Americans are jobless and struggling to pay the rent Trump wants to waste millions, perhaps billions, to paint the border wall black. That money would be better spent providing food, medicine and clothing to the needy.

To those running away from persecution in their countries and seeking a better life in America, it doesn’t matter if the wall is black, silver or neon pink. They will climb over the wall, or tunnel under it, regardless of the damn color of the obstacle that’s keeping them from the land of freedom and opportunity.

I’m reminded of the song “Paint it Black” by one of Trump’s favorite rock bands, The Rolling Stones:

 I look inside myself and see my heart is black

I see my red door, I must have it painted black

Maybe then I’ll fade away and not have to face the facts

It’s not easy facing up, when your whole world is black

Trump, your heart is pitch black and I’m not surprised you want to paint everything black, but your days are numbered. The black cloud that hovers over America will disappear when we kick you out of office.

Being a Trump Speechwriter is the Most Frustrating Job in the World

Being a speechwriter for Donald Trump must be the most frustrating job in the world.

To begin with the functional-illiterate Trump believes he’s the most eloquent and articulate speaker in the world and he won’t hesitate to stray from the words written by those he considers his intellectual inferiors.

The stable genius doesn’t care about impressing pundits, politicians or college professors, he cares only about pandering to his base and he won’t think twice about disregarding the words written for him and speaking redneck to drive his followers into a frenzy.

A moron should never ad-lib, but that’s what Trump does best and I’m sure that his speeches bear little resemblance to the ones that were written by his speechwriters. Trump has a tendency to go off on a tangent and pontificate on subjects he knows nothing about.

Writing a speech for the fucking moron is like writing a speech for a dyslexic person with poor vision. I imagine no Trump speechwriter brags to his loved ones, “I wrote that speech” after the president delivers one of his tradmark incoherent and rambling speeches.

Trump Ends Daily Coronavirus Briefings, Blaming the Media

Every day for the past month Donald Trump held a press briefing on the coronavirus pandemic. The daily ritual soon developed a familiar formula: the scientists and physicians on the coronavirus response team would update the public on the status of the fight against the virus and instruct the public on steps we could take to flatten the curve, and then Trump would take the podium to contradict and refute them, berate the reporters and heap praise upon himself.

In spite of the nonsense Trump spouted and the fake cures that he promoted, we put up with Trump’s narcissism to listen to the advice and information provided by the preeminent coronavirus expert in the world, Dr. Anthony Fauci and the other physicians on the team.

And then came that fateful day when Trump went too far and suggested that injected a coronavirus patient with disinfectants might cure him. Trump was universally ridiculed and criticized, even by some Republican politicians and pundits.

Finally, Trump’s aides who had been cajoling and pleading with him to end his daily briefings prevailed, and he stopped having daily coronavirus briefings. Did the thick-headed egomaniac finally see a relation between his nose-diving poll numbers and his boastful and bitter performances at these daily briefings?

Of course, Trump blamed the media for ending his daily briefings, tweeting:

“What is the purpose of having White House News Conferences when the Lamestream Media asks nothing but hostile questions, & then refuses to report the truths or facts accurately. They get record ratings, & the American people get nothing but Fake News. Not worth the time and effort!”

The perfect solution would have been for the daily coronavirus briefings to continue without Trump, but he sees himself as the only person worth listening to and put a stop to the whole thing.

Trump loves the spotlight too much and I’m predicting that before long he will resume the daily briefings. For a few minutes of meaningful information and valuable advice from the experts, we will once again have to put up with the interminable bloviating from the orange buffoon.

Can You Imagine Trump Revealing That Extraterrestrials Are Real?

On Monday, the Pentagon released three videos depicting UFO’s executing flying maneuvers that defy the laws of physics. Some people are wondering if the government is preparing us for the greatest reveal in human history: extraterrestrials are real and they’ve made contact with us.

When our president is suggests that injecting or swallowing disinfectants may kill the coronavirus, naturally we all hope there’s intelligent life somewhere in the universe.

According to Wikipedia The Milky Way contains between 100 and 400 billion stars and at least 100 billion planets, you don’t have to be a rocket scientist to deduce that there’s probably intelligent extraterrestrial beings.

I’m praying that extraterrestrials will never make contact with us, because if an alien says “take me to your leader” and we introduce him to grotesquely obese Donald Trump with his urine-colored hair and mouth that looks like a sphincter, he may just destroy our planet.

I don’t think the Pentagon has proof that extraterrestrials have visited our planet, because Trump wouldn’t be able to keep his mouth shut. If Trump had proof that extraterrestrials are real can you imagine him at his next press conference:

My fellow Americans, I will soon make the most important announcement in history. No king, president or dictator has ever made such a huge and mindboggling proclamation as I will make sometime before the election. When I make this bigly revelation, I will win in the biggest landslide in American history.  

Trump Cultists, Go Ahead and Put Down the Kool-Aid and Swallow the Lysol

By virtue of the fact that Donald Trump is the President of the United States and the Leader of the Free World, we can’t dismiss out-of-hand every toxic tweet, incoherent statement and rambling speech.

But by the same token we’d be foolish to accept his every utterance as the Gospel truth worthy of serious consideration.

Old age, mental illness and just plain ugliness have taken a toll on the mind of the stable genius and he would be well-advised to carefully weigh his words and whenever possible stick to a prepared statement. Needless to say, a statement prepared by an aide who still has control of his mental faculties.

We all know how Trump rolls: he speaks without a filter and utters whatever vile, racist or idiotic thought has been germinating in his addled mind.

So, when Trump suggested to the scientists and physicians on his coronavirus response team that they should look into the possibility that injecting a person with disinfectant might kill the coronavirus, I just said to myself: There goes the fucking moron speaking out of his ass again.

Trying to make sense out of Trump’s vain babblings makes as much sense as trying to capture his farts in a bottle so they can be used as the main ingredient in perfume.

Unfortunately, Trump’s white evangelical base treats his every speech as the Sermon on the Mount, and his cultists are doubtless putting down their cups of Kool-Aid and looking under their kitchen sinks for disinfectant to inject or swallow. The world will end for these religious fanatics not with a bang or a whimper, but a gasp.

Rosie O’Donnell Believes Trump Will Lose in a Landslide, She’s Wrong! Dead Wrong!

“I think November we’re going to be a landslide and take Donald Trump out, that’s what I have to believe. I firmly believe that the heart of the nation is bigger than his mental illness and people will rise to the occasion and vote him out.”

Rosie O’Donnell

O’Donnell and Trump have engaged in a decade-long feud, which precedes Trump’s career in politics. This long-simmering feud will occasionally boil over on Twitter to the entertainment of us all.

When the former talk show host and comedian says that she believes Trump will lose in a landslide it’s a product of wishful thinking more than anything else.

The fact is that landslide presidential victories are a thing of the past, our nation is bitterly divided on ideological grounds and a few thousand votes in a few counties in battleground states will decides who wins.

Trump is the worst president in history and in a normal world he would lose in a landslide, but we aren’t living in a sane world. There’s a better chance than not that the buffoonish and racist septuagenarian will defeat the kindhearted but Alzheimer’s impaired challenger.

The fact is that the heart of the nation isn’t bigger than Trump’s mental illness, there are too many white evangelicals who are as spiritually and mentally as their false messiah.

Trump will only lose if every Democrat votes and encourages their friends and family members to vote as well.

Trump Cultists Willing to Sacrifice the Elderly and Open the Economy in the Middle of Coronavirus Pandemic to Help Him Win Reelection

Cult leaders are usually young, virile, eloquent and handsome men who project power and authority and every smooth word they utter is accepted as Gospel by their followers.

Donald Trump is neither young nor virile and his face with a bulbous nose, sphincter-shaped mouth and orange complexion is repulsive and frightening but every incoherent and nonsensical statement that he utters is accepted as Gospel by his white evangelical sycophants.

Having a cult leader as commander-in-chief during a time of peace and prosperity was unnerving and unsettling, but having Trump in charge during a pandemic is absolutely horrifying.

Trump followers are effectively cult members and they won’t be swayed from supporting their Dear Leader for any reason. Before they became MAGA nutjobs white evangelicals were already conditioned to accept the ranting and ravings of televangelists as the Gospel, therefore it’s not surprising that they accept everything their false Messiah says as Gospel regardless how fantastical and incoherent his comments may appear to a normal person.

During a crisis cult members depend upon and trust their cult leader more than ever, and they are willing to open the economy at the urging of their leader in the middle of a pandemic. They are more than willing to sacrifice the elderly and other vulnerable citizens in order to save the economy and help the reelection prospects of their Messiah.

For Trump cultists what’s good for Trump is good for the country and if you challenge his medically unsound policies you are fighting against God.

It’s clear that we are fighting the coronavirus as well as the more insidious infection of Trumpism. Things will not return to any semblance of normalcy until with defeat Trumpism and COVID-19