“He may have sponsored a grandiose U.S. bicycle race in the 1980s but President Donald Trump isn’t likely to be seen on a bicycle any time soon, he pointed out on August 21. And that’s despite Fox News showing a clearly virile and fit Joe Biden riding his bicycle near a reporter earlier in the month:
It was a risky move for Joe Biden to ride a bicycle, a septuagenarian’s bones are very brittle, if he fell more than his pride would be injured. An old codger like Biden riding a bike wearing a bike helmet looks more ridiculous than Mike Dukakis riding a tank wearing a combat helmet. At least Biden wasn’t wearing Lycra bike shorts, that would have been the end of his presidential campaign.
I understand Trump’s reluctance to ride a bike, a hippo riding a bike is a spectacle that belongs in a circus. Trump’s bones are as brittle as Biden’s, and if he tumbled the pain of broken bones would make him forget all about his bone spurs.
Biden should keep in mind that John Kerry, who won the Democratic nomination for president in 2004, hit a curb and fractured his femur in 2015 while riding a bike, when he was 71.
Septuagenarians have no business riding bicycles, and come to think of it, they are too freaking old and have no business running for president.
Biden’s security detail should install training wheels on his bicycle, or better yet, they should buy him a Hoveround. We can’t risk Biden taking a tumble while riding a bike, and having to withdraw from presidential race; America can’t survive another four years of the corruption and ineptitude of the Trump administration.