Month: December 2018

Robert Paul Reyes: My New Year’s Resolution, Impeach Trump

Impeach Trump Now

Every year for about two decades I have posted my Top Ten New Year`s Resolutions online, and they are invariably self-centered: Lose weight, exercise, and give up certain unnamed vices.

At this critical juncture in America`s history, I have only one resolution, and it`s not self-centered, it concerns all of us: to fight for the impeachment and removal from office of Donald Trump.

I am more than willing to gain weight and forego exercise as I dedicate myself to my mission from God: get rid of Trump by any means necessary.

It`s fortuitous that my renewed desire to impeach Trump coincides with the Democrats gaining control of the House. The time is now, we can`t afford to wait until Special Counsel Robert Mueller`s report is released to begin impeachment proceedings.

The unnecessary shutdown, the attacks on the independent judiciary, the vitriol showered on the free press, the politicization of the military, the demonization of black and brown immigrants, the assault on the rule of law, the degradation of social norms. Congress must act now. Impeach Trump.

I live on a fixed income, and I don`t have any discretionary income to support organizations committed to the impeachment of Trump, but I will use my writing talent, such as it is, to advocate for his impeachment.

When Will the Fashion Police Arrest Melania Trump?

Fashionista Melania

After months of being roundly criticized for not visiting American troops in a war zone, Donald Trump, with Melania in tow, made a surprise visit to Iraq December 26.

Trump treated his trip like a campaign stop, complete with a campaign stump speech full of lies and tomfoolery.

As usual Melania didn`t say or do anything of consequence, and as usual reporters had nothing to comment us besides her usual strange outfits.

Homegirl made quite an entrance when she descended from Air Force One wearing a green coat and skin-tight nude colored leather pants.

Thank God her hideous green coat covered her crotch area, the world was spared the sight of the Mother of All Camel Toes.

Forgive me, I apologize for being so disrespectful. I apologize to camels everywhere for comparing the first lady to them.

Link to pic of Melania`s frightful outfit:

https://www.thecut.com/2018/12/melania-trump-wears-tan-leather-leggings.html

Donald Trump is a Coward

Cadet Bone Spurs

Donald Trump has always yearned to be the alpha dog, but it`s difficult to be the top dog when he`s been neutered by his cowardice.

He`s like a lap dog who barks ferociously when he`s safely ensconced in the lap of his owner, but cowers at the slightest sound when he`s by himself.

Trump earned worldwide fame as the head honcho in “The Apprentice,” in the make-believe world of reality TV he dispatched contestants with his trademark phrase: You`re Fired!

But in the real world the presidential poodle doesn`t have the gonads to fire anyone in person, he always delegates that unpleasant task to one of his subordinates.

In the presence of dictators with balls of steel like Russian President Vladimir Putin, Cadet Bone Spurs becomes obsequious and servile.

It took our fearless leader almost two years to summon up the courage to visit soldiers in a war zone, and he probably wouldn`t have made the trip to Iraq without his wife by his side holding his tiny hand.

Out commander-in-chief has frequently boasted that he was ready to serve during the Vietnam War, but he obtained a medical deferment to keep him from being drafted.

The New York Times recently reported that Trump was diagnosed with bone spurs by a podiatrist as a favor to Trump`s dad, who was his landlord.

Trump is such a sniveling coward that I`m betting that once the Mueller Report is released, and it shows there`s overwhelming evidence that he`s guilty of several felonies, including conspiring with Russia, he won`t have the stomach to fight impeachment and he will resign.

Cat Loves Riding Llama

Cats are Gods

“The lama serves its meowjesty, giving the insolent cat a ride during cold showy weather so the kitty doesn`t freeze its paws.”

Sputnik

Felines demand to be treated like royalty, they expect gourmet cat food, spotless litter boxes, and frequent petting. If we are properly servile and obsequious they might reward us with a meow or a purr.

But it turns out that cats treat all animals with disdain, this insolent kitty is riding on top of a llama during a snowy day so she won`t freeze her paws.

Some things never change, the ancient Egyptians considered cats deities, and we`re still treating them like gods.

Check out the video, I don`t detect an ounce of gratitude in the cat`s expression.

Link to video:

https://sputniknews.com/videoclub/201812261070994769-cat-rides-sheep/

Melania Trump is as Mysterious as a Russian Topless Bartender at a Strip Club

Trophy Wife

If you ask me there`s no mystery about Melania Knauss, she`s a former nude model who struck faux gold when she married real estate magnate Donald Trump.

But her life before she became Trump`s third trophy wife is shrouded in mystery.

We know that soon after she stopped wearing a training bra she started her modeling career, but is she a college graduate?

We know that up until Trump`s shocking election victory her personal website claimed that she obtained a degree in design and architecture at an unnamed university in Slovenia.

We should take anything Melania says with a grain of salt, she`s as well acquainted with the truth as her husband.

The truth is that Melania dropped out of the University of Ljubljana in Slovenia after one year to dedicate herself to her nude modeling career. At least she didn`t claim that she graduated from Trump University, she may not be a college graduate but she`s not that dumb.

Melania was forced to update her site to read “paused her studies to advance her modeling career in Milan and Paris.” Another Trumpian lie, she never resumed her studies and there`s no proof that she ever sashayed down a catwalk in Paris or Milan.

It`s frequently reported that she`s fluent in five languages: Slovene, English, German, Serbian and French, but I bet that the only thing she can say in German, Serbian and French is “Yes, Mr. Millionaire I`d love to see your hotel room.” Think about it, she`s been in America for decades, but she speaks in broken English.

It`s obvious Melania isn`t a fluent English speaker, and she can barely write in English, which explains why she has a penchant for plagiarizing the speeches of Michelle Obama.

There is as much mystery to Melania as there is about your favorite Russian topless bartender at a strip club.

Donald Trump is a Grinch! Yes, Coleman, There is a Santa Claus!

Donald Grinch

Donald Trump spoke to children whose calls to NORAD had been patched through to the White House lines – there`s no way the Stable Genius can screw up this photo-op, right?

In front of a crackling fire and between two Christmas trees even a Grinch like Trump should have been filled with the Christmas spirit.

But in a Christmas Eve call, Trump asked 7-year-old Coleman whether she still believes in Santa Claus.

“Are you still a believer in Santa? Because at 7, it`s marginal, right?” Trump asked Coleman.

If a seven-year-old child calls a Santa Claus hotline, you don`t have to be a Stable Genius to deduce that the wee innocent still believes in Santa.

Dear God let`s hope that calls to a suicide prevention hotline aren`t routed to the Oval Office, for another photo-op.

I can only imagine the conversation as Trump takes a call from a teenager contemplating suicide:

Justin from San Francisco: I can`t do anything right! What`s the point? I really want to kill myself!

Trump: Jump off the Golden Gate Bridge you freaking loser! No big loss, I doubt a liberal loser like you was planning on voting for me in 2020 anyway.

Yes, Coleman, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as crass commercialism and greed exists in this capitalist state. Go to a mall, if one still exists in your town, and you will see me there.

Merry Christmas to little Coleman and to all my readers! Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

This Christmas Curse Out a White Evangelical in the Name of Jesus Christ

White Evangelicals are evil

According to Christian tradition the seven deadly sins are: envy, gluttony, greed or avarice, lust, pride, sloth, and wrath. But white evangelicals, many of whom are obese, proud of their sanctimoniousness, envious of their more well-heeled mainline Protestant brethren, and angry with anyone who doesn`t worship Trump, think that sexual sin is the mother of all sin.

They consider a Christian, especially a woman, caught in sexual transgression the lowest form of sinner. They demonize gays and lesbians, and treat them like trash, even though Jesus Christ never condemned homosexuality, or even mentioned gays. Jesus apparently wasn`t bothered that people might think he was gay, because he spent every day and night during his ministry living with twelve male apostles.

About 80 percent of white evangelicals voted for Trump in 2016, and in spite of the Stormy Daniels scandal, and his affairs with other women of ill-repute there has been no erosion of support.

You won`t hear any televangelist or minister rail against Trump and his many sexual transgressions, and you won`t hear any layperson bemoan the short-fingered vulgarian`s sexual escapades.

White evangelicals frequently proclaim that the Bible tells us to pray for our leaders, and that we should pray for Trump. But they never pray for Trump to repent of his predatory sexual behavior, his greed and mean spirit, instead they pray that the Almighty would continue to bless him. As if God would bless an unrepentant sinner who takes pride in his sins, sexual or otherwise.

Damn Donald Trump and his white evangelical enablers, gays will sashay through the Pearly Gates while they will be greeted in hell by demons with an insatiable appetite for sodomizing religious hypocrites.

There is No War on Christmas! America is Besotted With Christmas! Merry Christmas!

Phony War on Christmas

America is still nominally a Christian nation, but the future is secular and based on science and algorithms, and the advent of Artificial Intelligence will eclipse faith in deities based on holy books.

But Christian beliefs and rituals still permeate our culture, and there in no nation on Earth where Christianity is more accepted and welcomed than America.

During the holiday season you can`t turn on the TV or radio, pick up a magazine or click on a Web site without being bombarded with a chorus of “Merry Christmas” and other tidings of religious expression.

But evangelicals, perhaps because they see secularism and other faiths gaining ground, claim that there`s a war on Christmas. The claim is preposterous and it requires a giant leap of faith and a keg of beer to believe and promulgate the conspiracy theory.

Donald Trump will do anything to cater to his evangelical base that elected him president, and therefore he has fashioned himself as the leading protector of Christmas.

Franklin Graham says that President Trump`s encouragement of Americans to publicly celebrate Christmas has emboldened people to fight back when the holiday is censored.

“When the president takes a stand like saying `Merry Christmas,` this emboldens others to take a stand just like the president`s… to fight back.”

Trump is a cross between the Grinch, Ebenezer Scrooge and Baby Huey, and the spectacle of the president as a crusader for Christmas makes me want to vomit.

Trump, Graham and white evangelicals can stuff their phony war on Christmas up their nether regions.

This white evangelical-hating liberal has no problem saying “Merry Christmas.” I wish all of my readers, of all religious persuasions, a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

Just How Gay is Mike Pence?

Handsome gay gentleman

“If Mike Pence is so inclined, he has a seat reserved for him to watch Broadway`s The Prom, the new Broadway musical that made history in November by giving the Macy`s Thanksgiving Day Parade its first televised same-sex kiss ever.

The vice president, who has taken multiple anti-LGBT positions over the years, has been personally invited to watch the show that follows a lesbian girl`s efforts to take her girlfriend to prom in Indiana. In fact, the location was specifically chosen because it is Pence`s home state, according to The Prom`s co-writer and lyricist Chad Beguelin.

People

Mike Pence`s meticulously cut hairstyle is favored by a maître d`hôtel at a restaurant that caters to an exclusively gay clientele and a receptionist at a gay bathhouse, naturally there are rumors that the virulently anti-gay politician is a latent homosexual.

Pence famously calls his wife “Mother,” a clear indication that he doesn`t think of her in sexual terms. If Pence succeeds Trump as president I wouldn`t be surprised if everyone in his cabinet looked like a pool boy at a gay resort.

In November 2016, Pence was booed by a Broadway audience when he went to see Hamilton with his family, he might have reservations about attending another Broadway show.

I doubt Pence will attend considering “The Prom” features lesbians kissing, if the show featured gay hunks locking lips he would find an excuse to attend. He could always leave when the male leads lock lips, and explain to his evangelical base that he watched the hit Broadway show only to make a statement against gay sexuality.

Pence should do the right thing and come out of the closet and become a champion for gay rights. It would be a shame if he spent the rest of his life in his prayer closet getting real intimate with his male prayer partners.

Peaceful Pics of Cats Nestling in Christmas Trees

https://boingboing.net/2018/12/18/cat-enjoys-nesting-in-christma.html

This is a link to photos and videos of felines peacefully nesting in Christmas trees. Looking at these image will fill you with the Christmas spirit up the wazoo.

Unfortunately, in real life a cat will nestle in a Xmas tree only after he has bit all the Christmas lights and littered your living room with tinsel.

I`ve owned cats all my adult life, and I learned decades ago that if you own one of these mischievous critters don`t even try setting up a Christmas tree.

But by all means enjoy these stress-relieving images of kitties nestling in Christmas trees. You might also enjoy pics of unicorns with butterflies streaming out of their rear ends.

December 2018 Archives Page Two:

December 2018 Archives Page Two

Official White House Christmas Portrait an Abomination From the Pit of Hell

Creepy Portrait

Melania Trump just posted this year`s official White House Christmas portrait, and there`s nothing homey or Christmassy about it.

I`m not a photographer, I can`t even take a decent selfie, but I can spot a bad photo when I see one.

The image has a surreal non-human quality, I wonder if the photographer was the famous Sophia the Robot.

The presidential couple looks two dimensional, almost like cardboard cutouts.

They are looking at the camera with big smiles, obviously the smiles aren`t a result of the warmth of their relationship, but the automatic reflex of politicians facing cameras.

They are holding hands, something Melania is loath to do with her husband, maybe the holding hands was photoshopped.

Melania`s infamous blood-red Christmas trees are nowhere to be seen, they posed in a room with normal-looking Christmas trees, except for the disturbing fact that the red Christmas balls aren`t hanging from the trees but are littered around the stumps.

The couple`s son, Barron, is not pictured, he was probably hanging out with a Secret Service agent or whoever is responsible for raising him.

The image is devoid of any religious symbolism: no Baby Jesus, manger scene or any other traditional Christian object.

Trump doesn`t even pretend to be an evangelical, no problem though, his white evangelical base still worships him.

I found myself unconsciously making the sign of the cross after looking at this execrable photograph.

Space Cadet Donald Trump Orders Creation of Space Command

Space Cadet Trump

“President Donald Trump ordered the creation of Space Command on Tuesday, a move the administration is labeling a precursor to creating a US Space Force.

`I direct the establishment, consistent with United States law, of United States Space Command as a functional Unified Combatant Command,` Trump said in an executive memorandum to Secretary of Defense James Mattis. `I also direct the Secretary of Defense to recommend officers for my nomination and Senate confirmation as Commander and Deputy Commander of the new United States Space Command.`”

CNN

Cadet Bone Spurs aka Stable Genius aka Commander-in-chief Donald Trump directed Secretary of Defense James Mattis to establish a Space Command.

Before joining the administration General “Mad Dog” Mattis would have scoffed at the notion of a Space Force, but the neutered lap dog will proclaim that it`s the greatest invention since the Boy Scouts.

Mattis will provide Trump with nominations for the commander and deputy commander of Space Command, we will soon find out which military leaders he hates the most.

Vice President Mike Pence, speaking at Cape Canaveral Tuesday, praised the creation of the new sixth branch of the armed forces, the US Space Force. Pence is such a lackey of the president, that I wouldn`t be surprised if he volunteers to be a space cadet. Pence`s undying loyalty is to Jesus, Mother and Trump, not necessarily in that order.

Nobody in Trump`s administration, especially Mattis and Pence, has the courage to tell the Emperor that he`s not wearing any clothes, naturally nobody will tell him that his Space Force is Looney Tunes.

I might volunteer to be a space cadet if I can do basic training on Mars, where I will be far away from the moron in the White House.

Donald Trump’s Wall Will Never be Built

Orange Clown

“Anytime you hear a Democrat saying that you can have good Boarder Security without a Wall, write them off as just another politician following the party line. Time for us to save billions of dollars a year and have, at the same time, far greater safety and control.”

Donald Trump Tweet

Donald Trump`s Twitter feed gives us a glimpse into his psyche, he tweets about what keeps him awake at night. The only thing that would devastate him more than the wall not being built would be if a terrorist attack brought down Trump Tower.

The wall is a macho thing for the stable genius, to compensate for his tiny hands he desperately wants to build a high wall between the United States and Mexico to protect his white base from unwashed brown migrants.

Trump is so desperate and eager to share his toxic thoughts on social media that he doesn`t bother asking one of his aides to check his messages for typos or grammatical mistakes.

This tweet isn`t the smocking gun that proves that Trump is a fuc*ing moron, there have been literally hundreds that expose his stupidity, vulgarity and evil nature.

It`s just another in a string of tweets that illustrates why we must get rid of the idiot by any means necessary.

All Americans, including boarders, will rest easy only when Trump is convicting for his myriad crimes and is incarcerated in a federal prison with high walls.

Donald Trump is a Malignant and Suffocating Presence in American Life? How Do We End the Nightmare?

In a sane period in American history, before the ascendancy of Donald Trump, we didnt give much thought to who was in power. We went about our daily lives comfortable in the knowledge that Congress, the Supreme Court, and the president (whomever he might be) would keep our democracy humming along.

We only thought of the president during times of national emergency: in the advent of a national emergency, the declaration of a war or when he was delivering a speech of consequence, like a State of the Union address.

Then came Donald Trump. The president of the reality TV era is a malignant presence, he permeates every aspect of our culture from social media to the cable news outlets to late night TV.

He is a suffocating presence in American life, his white evangelical base meditates on him day and night with religious intensity, and his critics spend all their waking hours planning and scheming how they can impeach or by any other means get rid of the bastard.

Trump is always on TV, berating the political opposition, summarily firing members of his administration, and uttering lies.

Trump has caused millions of Americans to doubt in the existence of God, and millions of others to doubt the supremacy of democracy. If there`s a God in heaven why doesn`t he smite the moral degenerate? If democracy is the ideal form of governance, how in the name of God did we end up with Trump in the White House?

I must confess that I spend an inordinate amount of time thinking of Trump, as is evident in the hundreds of essays I`ve written about him in the last three years.

How can we preserve our sanity in the age of Trump? Assassination is morally repressible and illegal, and we mustn`t give it a moment`s consideration.

We must find solace in the truism that “this too shall pass,” but at the same time we must actively fight to end the Trump administration as soon as possible through legal and democratic means.

Comic Joe Wong is Spot On: Trump’s Wall Will Become Tourist Attraction

“Chinese-American comedian Joe Wong had a message for President Donald Trump about his proposed U.S.-Mexico border wall on Fridays broadcast of The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.

`I`m from China,` Wong said. `So I know a lot about walls. They don`t work.`

He then bluntly predicted what would eventually become of Trump`s southern barrier, should it ever be constructed – `a huge tourist attraction.`”

Huffington Post

Asians make lousy stand-up comics, how can you be funny when your comedy is so inscrutable and you`re so damn meek and mild? No emails please, I could give a damn if you don`t like my politically-incorrect humor.

But Joe Wong did make me smile when he said that Trump`s wall, should it ever be constructed, would be a huge tourist attraction.

The wall, especially with the Democrats in charge of the House, will never be built, it was never meant to be more than a dog`s whistle to Trump`s racist base.

But if it`s built it will surely be a tourist attraction, I can visualize tourists flocking to the wall to witness migrants rappelling over the cursed thing. Artists will paint murals on the wall, and graffiti artists will tag the wall from one end to the other. Other critics will take a more kinetic action, blowing up entrances in the name of freedom.

If there are dozens of tunnels between the highly militarized border between Israel and the Gaza, surely there will be hundreds of tunnels between Mexico and the United States.

The civilized world will demand “Tear down This Wall Mr. Trump,” and the next president will tear down the abomination.

Wong is spot on, the wall will be a damn tourist attraction.

Nancy Pelosi Eviscerates Donald Trump

The manspreading president sat in his yellow chair in front of the fireplace, I`m surprised he`s managed thus far to restrain himself from replacing it with a golden throne.

When Trump is in the Oval Office he expects all the supplicants, whether they`re heads of states or American politicians, to treat him with deference and respect.

Trump summoned the past and future Speaker of the House Nancy Pelosi and the Senate minority leader Chuck Schumer to discuss the budget and immigration, specifically his damn wall.

Trump expected the event that was televised live to showcase his determination to build the wall, and his superiority over his Democratic rivals. He probably imagined his evangelical base assembled in circle jerks in churches and living rooms across the nation praising Jesus over his performance.

But things didn`t go according to plan. Nancy and Chuck didn`t get the memo that they`re supposed to act like sycophants when granted an audience before the stable genius.

Trump was gesticulating wildly with his tiny hands, and practically shouting. But Chuck wasn`t intimidated and he matched Trump`s decibel level, and he waved his normal-sized hands in the air, making the president`s diminutive hands look even smaller in comparison.

And then the new sheriff in town, Nancy Pelosi, without raising her voice or gesticulating wildly put the mansplaining Trump in his place. She demonstrated that you don`t need to engage in histrionics to get the better of Trump, all that`s required is a spine and facts.

Pelosi gave us a glorious taste of how the House, with her in charge, will hold Trump accountable for the duration of his term, whether it`s a few months or two more wretched years.

Cat Gets Stuck in Dryer’s Vent

The cat`s owners discovered her in the tight spot, but were unable to free their kitty from the 6-in.-wide space she managed to crawl into.

“According to the RSPCA, a feline found herself caught in the pipework of a tumble dryer after crawling into the machine`s vent.

Unsure what to do next, the owners called RSPCA for help.”

People Magazine

It`s axiomatic that cats love warm dryers, whenever I open my dryer if I`m not paying attention one of my cats will jump in and snuggle in my warm clothes. I may seem like a terrible cat owner, but I`ve accidentally closed my dryer with one of my mischievous kitties inside.

I can certainly understand a feline jumping into a dryer, but until now I`ve never heard of a cat crawling into the machine`s vent.

When your cat gets stuck in a tree you call the fire department, and I guess when it gets stuck in a dryer`s vent you call the SPCA.

An officer from the SPCA greased the pipe with butter and pushed the cat out of the vent. The cat wasn`t injured, only her pride was hurt as she tried to lick off the butter from her fur.

The Chuck and Nancy Oval Office Emasculation of Donald Trump Rendered Mike Pence Mute

After Kanye West`s surreal Oval Office meeting with Donald Trump, ostensibly to talk about prison reform, went off the rails with the rapper dropping F-bombs like confetti, I thought surely there will never be a more surreal meeting in that lofty office where so much history has been made.

Suffice to say I was wrong, boy was I wrong.

Trump invited cameras to his Oval Office meeting with Chuck and Nancy, the narcissist thought the photo-op of him berating the Democratic Congressional leaders over their refusal to allocate funds for his wall would play well with his base.

Things didn`t go according to plan. It was like taking candy from a baby, Chuck and Nancy tricked Trump into owning his expected government shutdown.

After an animated Trump, wildly waving his tiny hands, said that Pelosi was “in a situation where it`s not easy for her to talk right now” because of the speakership race, Boss Lady Pelosi nipped that mansplaining in the bud, lecturing him:

Mr. President, please don`t characterize the strength that I bring to this meeting as the leader of the House Democrats, who just won a big victory.

There wasn`t a court jester present at the boisterous meeting, but there was a mute Elf on the Shelf. Mike Pence didn`t utter a word, maybe he thought that Jesus blessed him with the gift of invisibility, and nobody would even know he was there.

The only thing Trump accomplished is that for half a news cycle the Chuck and Nancy emasculation of the stable genius knocked the Mueller investigation as the lead story on the cable news outlets.

Melania Trump Hasn’t Bought Donald Trump Any Christmas Gifts

“FIRST LADY Melania Trump is yet to buy her husband any Christmas presents, with the couple frequently not exchanging festive gifts at all, it has been claimed.

A source close to the First Lady told Hollywood Life: `Melania absolutely loves Christmas, she goes all out, but as of now she has yet to buy Donald anything.`

`Melania says Donald`s next to impossible to buy for and often they don`t exchange gifts at all for Christmas.`”

Express

I can empathize with Melania`s quandary, after all what do you give a billionaire who already owns the most expensive toys in the world?

Perhaps the first lady can create her own Christmas card, as a token of the love and affection she has for her husband. But of course there is never any love and affection between a gold-digger/trophy wife and her spouse, so hand-created gifts are out of the question.

Anyway, judging by Melania`s blood-red Christmas trees her gifts would probably be as tacky and gaudy as the trinket a Madam of a brothel would give her favorite customer. She`s probably going to end up giving Trump a blood-red butt plug signed by Mike Pence.

At the Trump White House Christmas resembles Festivus, grievances may be aired, and I doubt any presents will be exchanged.

Donald Trump Screws Up Coin Toss at Army-Navy Game

Everything Donald Trump says or does is controversial, he can`t shake hands, salute or toss a coin without making headlines.

Trump attended the 119th annual Army-Navy game in Philadelphia, and video of the stable genius tossing the ceremonial coin has Twitter in a frenzy. Trump might as well have tossed Mike Pompeo`s salad (in the UrbanDictionary.Com definition of the phrase), for all the controversy that ensued.

Trump had one job to do, a very simple job, but as usual he screwed things up. How could Trump fail at such an easy task, his tiny fingers are custom-made for flipping a coin, for God`s sake!

A play-by-play description of the presidential toss won`t do it justice, you have to see the video to comprehend the awkwardness of the incident.

Let me just make this one point about the coin toss that shook a nation to its core. It`s understood that the celeb who tosses the coin isn`t expected to pick it up, nevertheless Trump arrogantly pointed at the ground for the referee to pick up the damn coin.

A president who is incapable of flipping a coin shouldn`t be allowed anywhere near the nuclear button. Impeach the coin-tossing wanker now!

Pence May be Dropped From Trump’s 2020 Ticket! Top 9 New Career Choices

If Mike Pence is banished from Donald Trump`s 2020 ticket, here are my top ten new career choices for him:

STORE MANNEQUIN

Just don`t place him too close to a female mannequin, he`ll sweat profusely.

ACCOUNTANT

Pence is straight out of central casting for this profession, his trademark furrowed brow is the perfect look when he`s examining your tax returns.

RECEPTIONIST AT A GAY BATHHOUSE

Most of us find him obnoxious, but he exudes a gay vibe that would be right at home in this environment

CHAPERONE FOR HIGH SCHOOL PROMS

We can all imagine him admonishing amorous young couples on the dance floor to “leave enough room for the Holy Ghost.”

DOG WALKER

His brown nose testifies that he`s used to the smell of excrement, he wouldn`t mind picking up after the dogs in his care.

MOVIE EXTRA

Every movie calls for a nondescript stranger who blends into the background, well Pence is a freaking beige wall.

FLUFFER FOR GAY PORN FLICKS

He`s certainly had plenty of experience fluffing up the orange clown in the White House.

BATHROOM ATTENDANT AT A 4-STAR HOTEL

Pence reeks obsequiousness and he would be a natural in this offbeat occupation.

PRESS SECRETARY FOR THE ANTI-CHRIST

I can just see him looking adoringly at the Anti-Christ as he proclaims that everyone must be branded with “666” on their hands or forehead.

Donald Trump Considering Kicking Mike Pence to the Curb

“On Monday, Trump hosted a 2020 strategy meeting with a group of advisers. Among the topics discussed was whether Mike Pence should remain on the ticket, given the hurricane-force political headwinds Trump will face, as demonstrated by the midterms, a source briefed on the session told me.

Last month, The New York Times reported that Trump had been privately asking advisers if Pence could be trusted, and that outside advisers have been pushing Nikki Haley to replace Pence.”

Vanity Fair

Rudolph the reindeer is defined by his red nose, and Mike Pence the Vice President is defined by his brown nose, he reeks of the essence of Donald Trump.

Pence speaks of Trump in reverent tones, and gazes at him with religious fealty and devotion, leading many to conclude that he`s Trump`s bitch, and incapable of turning against his master.

Pence is Trump`s chief apologist, as soon as the short-fingered vulgarian`s latest incomprehensible and vile tweet is posted online, he can be relied upon to twist its meaning until it sounds like a verse from the Bible.

But Pence`s public obsequiousness is covering his ambition and revulsion of Trump`s crudeness and immorality.

Trump isn`t a real evangelical, he just utters the anti-gay rhetoric and anti-abortion claptrap that is music to the ears of his white evangelical followers. But Pence is the real deal, and he believes that his best chance of becoming president and ushering the kingdom of Christ on Earth is to show outward allegiance to the anti-Christ figure currently in power.

It looks like Trump is finally on to Pence`s machinations, and I hope that he kicks the sanctimonious bastard to the curb.

Read More:

https://www.vanityfair.com/news/2018/12/mike-pence-2020-mueller-trump

Melania Trump is un-American!

Melania Trump has eastern European accent of a madam of a brothel at a major city that caters to an international clientele and the bearing of a concierge at a 4-star hotel. She has the confidence of a supermodel sashaying down a runway, and the haughty look of a trophy wife whose working days are well behind her. She`s been in America for decades, but her broken English speaks to her disdain at learning the language of her adopted country. Her Haute couture outfits testify to her need to distinguish herself from the unwashed masses. Her unambiguous defense of her husband lets us know in no uncertain terms that she knows which side her bread is buttered. Her failure to bond with the electorate highlights the “let them eat cake” attitude of someone who considers herself royalty.

And you ask why I don`t like or respect Melania Trump?

On the Death of My Cat Ebony

I was watching coverage of President George HW Bush`s state funeral, and my eyes got a little bit moist when I heard his son President George W. Bush eulogize him. Bush had a huge impact on the 20th century and his life and death touched millions around the globe.

I had seen my cat Ebony underneath the sofa earlier in the morning, not an unusual spot for her to chill out. But a sense of foreboding made me check on her again — she was still in the same spot and in the same posture. I immediately pulled out the sofa, and I lifted her stiff carcass and balled my eyes out.

Some individuals, like the aforementioned Bush, leave a huge imprint on history, but most of us only affect the lives of our family and close friends. When my heart stops beating and my body turns cold and rigid, I hope that family, friends and colleagues will have warm remembrances.

Pets also touch the lives of their families, for eighteen years I enjoyed Ebony`s companionship. Each of my pets has his own distinctive quirk, Ebony was an attention whore, and when I was watching TV or writing essays she would demand my attention by gently touching my arm with her paw.

Ebony touched my arm and my heart, and I will sorely miss her. She`s at the pearly gates now, I suppose, trying to get St. Peter`s attention by touching him on the arm.

Donald Trump Shocks America by Saluting the Casket of George HW Bush

Donald Trump is an affront to the Almighty and an embarrassment to America, with every word that he utters, and every step that he takes he diminishes our democracy.

The president of the deplorables and his trophy wife, Melania Trump, paid their respects at the U.S. Capitol Rotunda to President George HW Bush.

Trump approached Bush`s flag-draped casket, stood silent for a moment and then he raised his tiny hand to his orange face in a salute.

The unmitigated gall of Cadet Bone Spurs saluting a genuine war hero shocked a nation.

Only military personnel have earned the right to salute, Trump might as well have flipped the casket with his grotesquely tiny digit.

Trump`s presence at any solemn event is an obscenity, he should have remained in the White House doing what he does best, tweeting vulgar and mean tweets from his porcelain throne.