Donald Trump and The Rapture

Unlike former presidents Ronald Reagan and George W. Bush, Trump doesn’t believe in evangelical eschatology, or even Christianity in general. Christian morals and beliefs have no place in his all-consuming ambition to make as much money as possible while becoming as famous as possible.

The aforementioned former Republican presidents paid lip service to evangelical concerns during their presidential campaigns, but once they assumed power, they ignored their evangelical brethren.

Trump on the other hand is on a mission from God to make all of the evangelical wet dreams come true, he’s given them almost everything they’ve lusted for: stacking the federal courts with pro-life judges, moving the United States embassy to Jerusalem and filling his administration with Bible thumping fundamentalists.

Trump keeps white evangelical support at a fever pitch by playing to the idea that God has anointed him to be president, and that his fealty to evangelical principles will usher in the End Times.

The short-fingered vulgarian is staking everything on the belief that pandering to white evangelicals will guarantee his reelection. Evangelicals believe that their orange-tinged messiah will usher in the Rapture, that Jesus will rapture them out of this world, and leave the godless liberals, limp-wristed gays and feminist lesbians to face seven years of hell on earth.

Trump’s version of the Rapture would be the Almighty rapturing all winners to a heavenly resort where hookers stroll naked on the streets of gold, and there’s not a person of color in sight.

If Trump is reelected, he will no longer need white evangelicals to remain in power, and he will pray that those useful idiots will be raptured out of this world.

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