A Senile Donald Trump Calls in to ‘Fox & Friends’ on his Birthday

Most septuagenarians celebrate birthdays by putting on their dentures to nibble at a sheet cake from Costco with their fellow nursing home residents whose names they’ve long ago forgotten.

Trump’s mind is as addled as your average nursing home resident, but wealth and privilege has enabled him to move from a mansion to the White House, and he celebrated his 73rd birthday by calling in to the three bobble head dolls/anchors of Fox & Friends: Steven Doocy, Ainsely Earhardt, and Brian Kilmeade.

If your senile grandpa calls you on his birthday you will indulge him for a few minutes before cutting him off, but when the demented grandpa is the President of the United States and he’s calling in to his favorite show in his favorite network the three stooges have no recourse but to let him eat up almost an hour of the top-rating cable news program.

The marathon call was a 50-minute stream of consciousness/river of petty vindictiveness occasionally interrupted with a sycophantic comment from dumb, dumber, and bimbo.

I’m not going to get into the substance of Trump’s diatribe for that would be as educational and enlightening as examining my diarrhea after consuming a 7-11  hotdog. Suffice to say that watching Trump call in to Fox & Friends lowered my IQ by 20 points, and raised my blood pressure by 50 points.