donald trump

OMG! Can You Imagine Donald Trump as an Airline Pilot?

In the aftermath of an Ethiopian Airlines crash that killed all 157 passengers on board, the stable genius offered his ideas on improving airline safety.

We might be wise listen to the owner of defunct Trump Airlines, the shuttle service that operated flights from LaGuardia Airport to Logan International Airport and Ronald Reagan Airport.

Maybe not, after all the fuc*ing moron bankrupt Trump Airlines in less than five years due to his mismanagement and incompetence.

Here`s what the engineer-in-chief had to say, on Twitter of course:

Airplanes are becoming far too complex to fly. Pilots are no longer needed, but rather computer scientists from MIT. I see it all the time in many products. Always seeking to go one unnecessary step further, when often old and simpler is far better. Split second decisions are….

… needed, and the complexity creates danger. All of this for great cost yet very little gain. I don`t know about you, but I don`t want Albert Einstein to be my pilot. I want great flying professionals that are allowed to easily and quickly take control of a plane!

We don`t need Albert Einstein or a computer scientist from MIT flying commercial airplanes, and we also don`t need tips from a businessman who has several bankruptcies under his belt telling us how to run an airliner or any other business.

I wouldn`t be surprised if Trump petitions the FAA to reduce cruising altitude from 35,000 feet to five thousand feet so commoners will be able to read the Trump logo when he`s flying one of his private jets.

Can you imagine Trump as an commercial airline pilot?

I`d like to welcome the ladies and gentlemen on first class, never mind the losers flying coach.

My copilot for this flight is Mike Pence, his primary responsibility is serving me coffee and fluffing my hair. But in case of an emergency, the Holy Roller will recite a prayer over the PA system.

But don`t worry! This will be a beautiful flight, believe me! I will probably set a world record getting you to your destination.

To reduce tension and anxiety feel free to flirt with all the stewardesses, believe me, they are all hot! I picked the bitches myself!

I`d like to ease your mind by informing you that there are no therapy animals onboard this flight, crapping and pissing all over the cabin. God, how I hate puppies, kittens and all fluffy animals that losers and mental cases rely on for comfort.

Pence you moron! Wait until I get up to stretch my legs before you try to kiss my ass. Sorry, ladies and gentlemen, it`s so hard to get good help these days.

Thank God Trump isn`t a pilot, engineer or anything having to do with the airline business.

Donald Trump’s Wall is a Symbol and Manifestation of Evil Incarnate

Stable Genius

Trump`s mantra and rallying cry during the 2016 presidential campaign was “I will build a wall and Mexico will pay for it.” It was a perfect metaphor and slogan designed to appeal to Trump`s racist white evangelical base.

Trump`s mythical wall crystalized the xenophobia, racism and bigotry of his base into a tangible and concrete object. When his supporters chant “Build the Wall” they are thinking to themselves: Deport those wetbacks! Stop spics and niggers from invading our homeland!

Trump`s base doesn`t know geopolitics from a prayer cloth, and they assumed that it would be a piece of cake for their Messiah to hoodwink the Mexican president into paying from his damn wall.

In 1626, a Dutch trader, Peter Minuit, purchased the island of Manhattan for the equivalent of $24 worth of beads and trinkets, so why couldn`t the art of the deal businessman con the ignorant Mexicans into paying for his vanity project?

It`s now become obvious to even the most deluded Trump supporters that Mexico isn`t paying for the damn wall, but such is their hatred of everyone who isn`t white that they will gladly pay for the abomination with their taxes.

Trump himself has become the manifestation of the wall, his supporters perceive him as a bulwark against godless abortionists, activist liberal judges, disease-ridden criminal immigrants, feminists and secular scientists.

To quote Martin Luther King Jr, “Let us realize the arc of the moral universe is long, but it bends toward justice.” The MAGA crowd is terrified of this universal march toward justice where white people will no longer be at the top of the pecking order, and they see Trump as their last Great White Hope.

Fortunately, Trump and his sycophants are fighting a losing battle against demographics, democracy, and the innate desire of people for justice and liberty.

The wall will never be built, but every day that Trump remains in power he erodes our constitutional democracy, he must be impeached and removed from power now rather than later.

There Are Only Two Degrees of Separation Between Trump and Any Pedophile, Prostitute, Playboy Model or Porn Star

Short-fingered Vulgarian

“Six degrees of separation is the idea that all people are six, or fewer, social connections away from each other. As a result, a chain of a friend of a friend statements can be made to connect any two people in a maximum of six steps. It was originally set out by Frigyes Karinthy in 1929 and popularized in an eponymous 1990 play written by John Guare. It is sometimes generalized to the average social distance being logarithmic in the size of the population.”

Wikipedia

This maxim hold true for most individuals, but in the case of Donald Trump there are only two or three degrees of separation between him and any porn star, madam, Playboy bunny, racist, political trickster or pedophile.

I`m not surprised that at a Super Bowl party at his golf club Trump took a selfie with Li Yang, the owner of the massage parlor where New England Patriots owner Robert Kraft paid a masseuse/prostitute for a happy ending.

There are no degrees of separation between the short-fingered vulgarian and deviants and criminals the likes of billionaire registered sex offender Jerry Epstein, former Trump Campaign Chairman Paul Manafort convicted of filing false tax returns and bank fraud, porn star Stormy Daniels who disgraced her noble profession by having a close encounter of the third kind with Trump`s toadstool, White supremacist David Duke and 101 Russian mobsters, oligarchs and spies.

I am determined that there will be more than six degrees of separation between me and Trump and any of his supporters. If you still support Trump after two years of the lies, racism and misogyny of his administration you are dead to me.

Sacrilege: Donald Trump Signs Bibles of Alabama Tornado Victims

Touring the area where a devastating tornado touched down, Donald Trump signed Bibles for supporters who gathered to see him at a Baptist church in Opelika, Ala.

In the aftermath of the violent tornado you`d think evangelicals would be in fear of the awesome power of their God, and for at least the next few days and weeks live righteously.

Instead the white evangelicals thrust their Bibles at the man who embodies all seven deadly sins, so he could defile their holy books with his huge vain autograph.

“Donald Trump signing bibles is like Hannibal Lecter signing cookbooks.”

Adam Best on Twitter

Or I might add like a prostitute signing a book titled: Purity Ring, the story of a girl who exchanged her dildos and romance books for the ultimate symbol of virginity when she found Christ.

Atheists would have been convinced of the existence of the Almighty had he smote that Baptist church with a lightning bolt while the short-fingered vulgarian was signing Bibles.

Jesus would bless the Bibles and the lives of white evangelicals if they followed the teachings of the Gospels, and repudiated the man who is the antithesis of the precepts of love, compassion and peace of the true Messiah.

I close with this warning from Two Corinthians (as the Donald would say):

For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ; that every one may receive the things done in his body, according to that he hath done, whether it be good or bad.

II Corinthians 5:7

I`m glad I won`t have to explain to Jesus why I begged the Antichrist to sign my Bible.

Dying Man’s Wish Granted, He Receives Call from Donald Trump

“A Connecticut man who is terminally ill received a phone call from President Donald Trump on Tuesday night, fulfilling a personal wish.

Jay Barrett, who has cystic fibrosis and is receiving palliative care, is an avid Trump supporter. Having some contact with the president was on his bucket list.

The call was facilitated by Bridgette Hoskie, Barrett`s sister, who is a local politician and a Democrat.

USA TODAY

If I was terminally ill and receiving palliative care, I would be cognizant that my days are numbered and every minute is precious. I certainly wouldn`t waste any precious moments chatting with a conman and blithering idiot like Donald Trump.

I would call my out-of-town family and friends, and perhaps a spiritual advisor. I would call a sex line before I would ring up Trump, even a sex phone operator is more sincere and genuine than the pathological liar who sits in the Oval Office.

Talking to the stable genius was on Barrett`s bucket list, I wonder what else is on his list: Taking a selfie with Kim Jong-un? Doing the Tango with Putin?

Trump is such an insincere bastard, he told Barrett: I`m very proud of you. I`ll talk to you again, Jay, OK? Unless Trump is a medium who can communicate with the dead, he ain`t gonna talk with Barrett again.

Anyway, to each his own I guess; I hope talking with Trump gave Barrett a small measure of peace.

Read More:

https://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2019/03/05/president-donald-trump-fulfills-dying-mans-wish-phone-call/3075893002/

Shame on The North Dakota State Bison for Accepting Invitation to Trump’s White House

“Another championship football team visited the White House on Monday.

And President Donald Trump once again had a buffet of fast food waiting for his guests.

Trump welcomed the Football Championship Subdivision champions – the North Dakota State Bison – to the White House on Monday. And, according to a pool report, he served them a lunchtime spread of Big-Macs, Chick-fil-A chicken sandwiches and French fries, among other fast-food items.

Trump served a similar meal to the Clemson Tigers when they visited the White House in January.”

USA Today

College football players are world-class athletes, and their bodies are their meal tickets — naturally they are very conscious about eating nutritionally balanced meals.

But a glutton thinks everyone is a glutton, and it`s not surprising that the morbidly obese Big Mac-loving president served his guests a feast of calorie-laden fast food.

I don`t think Trump`s fast food spread deserves to be called a “buffet,” even the most humble and inexpensive buffet offers at least a couple of fancy items like lobster tails or salmon. Unless the condiments included Grey Poupon mustard, there was nothing fancy about Trump`s lunchtime spread.

Not that I feel any sympathy for the North Dakota State Bison, that`s what they deserve for attending a function at the White House of the racist-in-chief.

Most champions of professional leagues, like the NBA champion Golden State Warriors, have refused to legitimize the presidency of Trump by visiting the White House.

I guess that only a team that few people have heard of, like The North Dakota State Bison, would accept an invitation to meet the president at the White House.

Read More:

https://www.usatoday.com/story/sports/ncaaf/2019/03/04/donald-trump-north-dakota-state-fast-food-white-house/3056111002/

Donald Trump’s CPAC Speech Was an Abomination

Abomination

Donald Trump hugged the American flag after walking on stage at the Conservative Political Action Conference (CPAC) to deliver a two-hour speech where he proceeded to denigrate everything Old Glory represents. He lambasted Congress, the Department of Justice, spread lies and conspiracy theories; he basically delivered an address that would be greeted with wild applause in Moscow.

It was a stream-of-consciousness diatribe, naturally it was riddled with expletives, and the conservative and evangelical audience couldn`t get enough of it.

I don`t want to parse or fact check Trump`s rant, suffice to say it was vintage Trump bullshit, only it dragged on longer than usual.

I want to zero in on Trump shameless stunt of humping the American flag before he started spewing his toxic views. When a religious or political leader is addressing his cult he doesn`t have to present a rational and logical basis for his philosophy. He`s cognizant that his followers have already ceded their thinking capabilities to him, and will accept anything he says as the Gospel truth.

In lieu of apologetics and reasoned discourse he will engage in shameless antics like embracing the flag. Those of us who haven`t swallowed the Kool-Aid will exclaim: OMG what a joke! Who would fall for such a corny and shallow display of patriotism? The answer is quite obvious, the millions of white evangelicals who voted for the bastard.

What lesson can we glean from Trump`s embrace of the flag, and the enthusiastic reaction from the CPAC audience? Namely this, you can`t reason with MAGA devotees, it`s as foolhardy a task as trying to convince Nazis that Hitler was a genocidal monster. White evangelicals are a lost cause, even atheists are praying that hell is real and that they will burn forever.

Forget the MAGA cultists, we must reach out to Independents and rational Republicans (There`s still a few of them left), and plead with them to join Democrats in voting out the abomination in 2020.

A Female or a Minority Democratic Candidate Must Face Off Against Trump in 2020

Parasite

“Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) told Late Night With Seth Meyers on Thursday that no matter who wins the Democratic nod, all of the candidates will rally around the nominee in order to defeat Donald Trump.

`We all understand that no matter who wins, everybody is going to rally around that candidate and defeat Donald Trump,` the 2020 contender said.”

The Hill

I couldn`t agree more with Sanders, regardless which of the hundreds of Democratic candidates for president eventually wins, it`s imperative that we rally around the nominee in order to defeat the abomination known as Donald Trump.

All of the Democratic hopefuls are infinitely more qualified morally, intellectually and in every other conceivable way than Trump.

But that doesn`t mean that Democrats and Independents must refrain from criticizing Democratic candidates for president before a winner emerges from the huge field.

I want the most qualified candidate to win, therefore I won`t stop criticizing Democratic candidates starting with the interloper Democratic Socialist Bernie Sanders, he is too white and too old. The last thing the Democratic Party needs facing off against Trump is a 77-year-old white man, who isn`t even a Democrat.

Enough said about Sanders, let`s move on to Joe Biden. The former vice president is too old, too white and too moderate. The last thing the Democratic Party needs facing off against Trump is a gaffe-prone crazy 76-years-old white man with a penchant for molesting young girls.

Now let`s consider Elizabeth Warren. The Senator from Massachusetts is too old and notwithstanding the fact that she`s .000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 percent Cherokee, too white. The last thing that the Democratic Party needs facing off against Trump is a 69-year-old white woman who falsely claimed to be Native American in order to advance her career.

Then there`s Amy Klobuchar, the boss from hell. It`s not misogynist to point out that the Senator from Minnesota isn`t just a demanding boss but a psychopath who demeans and humiliates her staff. The last thing the Democratic Party needs facing off against Trump is the only person who could rival the stable genius as the worst boss in the world.

That said there are dozens of eminently qualified presidential candidates such as Kamala Harris, Cory Booker, Kirsten Gillibrand and Julián Castro. In this upcoming presidential election cycle it`s imperative that a minority or a woman face off against Trump.

https://thehill.com/homenews/campaign/432171-sanders-2020-dems-will-rally-around-nominee-to-defeat-donald-trump

Democracy in Decline at the Hands of Donald Trump and Mike Pence

Fascist

Nobody was surprised when the opening salvo in Donald Trump`s 2016 presidential campaign was a blatantly racist attack on Mexican immigrants, branding them criminals and rapists.

For decades Trump has fanned the flames of racial controversies, in the 70`s a young Trump and his KKK-loving father were sued over discriminatory rental practices in their New York apartments.

In 1989, after black and Latino teenagers from Harlem were accused of assaulting and raping a white woman in Central Park, Trump spend thousands placing full-page ads in the four daily newspapers in New York City, demanding their execution.

A decade and a half later when their sentences were overturned based on DNA evidence and the confession of the real rapist, Trump refused to apologize.

Trump ran a racist campaign, demonizing Muslims and Hispanic immigrants to appeal to his racist white evangelical base, and his presidency has been marked by racist tweets, comments and policies.

Once again I`m not surprised, very few racists ever have an epiphany.

But I am somewhat surprised by Trump`s anti-gay sentiments and policies since he became president. Trump has been a life-long racist, but as a businessman and as a reality TV star he never expressed any homophobic views. As an entertainer he had contact with many gays and lesbians in the entertainment industry, and he was friendly with many of them.

But when he made common cause with white evangelicals in order to win the presidency he adopted their anti-gay agenda. Hence his choice of the anti-gay bigot Mike Pence as his vice president and the banning of transgender soldiers from the military.

Pence is explicitly anti-LGBTQ, and has been throughout his political career. Pence uses his extreme brand of Christianity to justify his right to discriminate. He quotes scripture to justify treating women and gays and lesbians as second-class citizens.

Trump recognizes Pence as an anal-retentive religious zealot, but he gives his second-in-command free rein to treat gays and lesbians with disdain, because he realizes it solidifies his support with his evangelical base.

Trump and Pence are the most damaging one-two punch democracy has suffered in our lifetimes, and everyone who loves freedom and democracy must devote their lives to the impeachment and removal from office of both of them.

Does Trump Suffer From Narcissistic Personality Disorder? is the Pope Catholic?

“Bill Maher believes every news story about President Donald Trump should begin in the same way.

The `Real Time` host said the following phrase – `President Trump, who suffers from a malignant narcissistic personality disorder` – should be written at the beginning of every story in a bid to explain his actions that are subsequently detailed.

Huffington Post

Maher is spot on, if you look up Donald Trump in the index of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders you will find him in the chapter that deals with narcissistic personality disorder.

George Conway, the spouse of top White House aide Kellyanne Conway, and frequent critic of Trump agrees with Maher. He tweeted that “American foreign policy is now driven more by one man`s narcissist personality disorder than by the national interest and rational consideration of intelligence assessments.”

Trump who probably can`t find Montana, let alone North Korea, on a map is such a delusional narcissist that he told South Korean President Moon Jai-in that he is the only person who can solve the North Korea problem.

But a case could also be made that every news story about Donald Trump should begin with the phrase: Pathological liar Donald Trump …

Almost every tweet, speech and press release that emanates from the White House is riddled with lies. Trump wouldn`t know the truth if it shook his tiny hand and bit off his puny presidential pecker.

Some would argue that every article about Donald Trump should begin with the phrase: Serial sexual predator Donald Trump …

Trump thinks with his penis, he has used his status and power as a real estate tycoon, reality TV star and President of the United States to exploit, harass and assault women.

One thing is damn sure, every news story about Trump should include a description of a pathology that explains his words and deeds.

Read More:

https://www.huffpost.com/entry/bill-maher-donald-trump-article_n_5c70f6eee4b00eed08347626

We Must Never Forgive or Forget Donald Trump and His Evangelical Enablers

Evangelical Darling

Donald Trump may escape impeachment, and he may even be reelected, but he will unquestionably go down in history as the worst president.

After two years in power Trump has done irreparable harm to our democracy, and he has diminished America`s power and influence in the world.

This too shall pass, and one of the darkest chapters in American history will end, but we must take pains to prevent another racist charlatan from making a mockery of our constitutional democracy.

Almost every educator, politician (of every party), theologian, journalist and historian will agree that the Trump administration has been an unqualified disaster.

But let`s not forget the roughly 40% of the electorate who has remained loyal to Trump through two years of racism, xenophobia, homophobia, misogyny and pathological lying.

Nothing Trump says or does, no matter how egregious and damaging to societal mores or constitutional norms can lessen the fervor that his evangelical base feels for him.

When our long national nightmare finally ends, and a normal president, regardless if he`s a Democrat or Republican, sits in the Oval Office we must not forget the wickedness of the white evangelicals who supported this moral degenerate.

Evangelicals cynically and ludicrously claim they`re persecuted even though they hold the highest positions of power in the Trump administration and Christianity is the most powerful and influential religion in this country.

It would be poetic justice if regular Americans turned on evangelicals and destroyed them hip and thigh, but that`s not the American way.

Evangelicals must pay a price for their treachery and deceit, we must tax their megachurches, expose their money grubbing televangelists, and teach in our public schools how Trump and the evangelicals undermined our democracy.

We must never forget or forgive the scandalous Trump administration, and we must never forget or forgive his sycophantic white evangelical enablers.

R.E.M Calls Donald Trump an A-hole

A-hole

“The band R.E.M. has branded Donald Trump an `a**hole` for sharing a video featuring one of their songs, then successfully rallied Twitter and its CEO Jack Dorsey to take it down.

Their fury was reignited when the president shared a fan-made video mocking Democrats on Friday that plays R.E.M.`s hit `Everybody Hurts` in the background.

The parody, created by Youtuber CarpeDonktum, displays Trump delivering his State of the Union address as the camera cuts to the sulking faces of Democrats watching his speech.

`The a**holes @CarpeDonktum created the meme. #PresidentA**hole retweeted it. Measures have been taken to stop it. @jack you need to get on this,` band bassist Mike Mills tweeted on Friday.”

Daily Mail

Mike Mills is spot-on: Donald Trump is a bloody a-hole!

A-hole is an epithet that is frequently used to describe the racist-in-chief; I`ve heard everyone from innocent little kids to cranky old codgers use this expletive to refer to him.

It`s axiomatic that Trump is an a-hole, nobody debates the matter, and even his most fervent (deluded) supporters don`t expend much energy arguing otherwise. They have the mindset: of course he`s an a-hole, but he`s our a-hole.

A-hole is an accurate description of Trump, not only do his policies, language and behavior scream “I`m an a-hole,” but his mouth resembles a sphincter.

Feces emanates from both of the moron`s orifices, fortunately adult diapers captures most of the crap that escapes from his rectum, and unfortunately he`s not wearing a mask or anything else to prevent verbal sewage from spewing from his mouth.

The perfect solution would be for Mike Pence to super glue a butt plug to his rectum, and for Melania to superglue one to his sphincter-shaped mouth.

Read More:
https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6713479/R-E-M-blasts-Donald-Trump-hole-sharing-video-featuring-song.html

February 2019 Archives Page Two:

February 2019 Archives Page 2

Dr. Sean Conley Says Donald Trump in Very Good Health! Poppycock!

“On Friday, the president made a four-hour visit to Walter Reed National Military Medical Center where his doctor, Sean Conley, performed his check-up with 11 other specialists.

In a statement, Conley said Trump `is in very good health and I anticipate he will remain so for the duration of his Presidency, and beyond.`”

Huffington Post

When you are a spokesperson, in any capacity, for a pathological liar the truth will seldom emanate from your lips. In the last two years we`ve witnessed how Donald Trump`s primary spokesperson, White House Press Secretary Sarah Sanders, spins and stretches the truth in an attempt to make sense of Trump`s contradictory and nonsensical statements.

Everyone in the Trump administration who has spoken on behalf of the president has lied to make the fuc*ing moron appear to be a rational person, if not quite a stable genius.

It should come as no surprise that Trump`s physician, Sean Conley, issued this statement:

“I am happy to announce the President of the United States is in very good health and I anticipate he will remain so for the duration of his Presidency, and beyond.”

You don`t have to be a physician or a stable genius to deduce that an obese septuagenarian with a history of heart disease, who never exercises and eats fat food on a regular basis isn`t long for this world.

With all due respect, Dr. Conley is a lying piece of crap and his medical license should be revoked.

The only question is what`s going to kill Trump first, the release of the Mueller Report dismissed as a “nothing burger” by his supporters or the zillionth hamburger that finally stops his ticker.

Read More:

https://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/trump-physical-exam-results_us_5c5fc94ae4b0910c63f13435

Donald Trump’s State of the Union Speech Tie Afflicted With Peyronie’s Disease

Moron

Donald Trump`s signature sartorial look is an absurdly long red tie. The Donald rarely buttons his jacket, he wants everyone to behold the amazing length of his tie.

You don`t have to be a rocket scientist, a stable genius or a fashionista to know that Trump`s long tie is compensation for his puny presidential pecker.

Trump triumphantly walked into the House chamber to deliver his State of the Union speech with his tie suffering from Peyronie`s disease. Nobody had the nerve to tell him that his tie was bent, and he delivered his address with his tie askew.

I once had a boss who walked around for hours with his zipper wide open, everybody hated his guts, and nobody wanted to spare him humiliation.

I`m surprised Mike Pence didn`t intentionally make his tie crooked to visually express solidarity with his boss.

It was appropriate and fitting that the most crooked president in history gave one of the most important speeches of his tenure wearing a crooked tie.

I don`t believe in accidents, I believe in a Supreme Being who is in control of the tiniest details. The Almighty Himself bent Trump`s tie to express how much He despises the short-fingered vulgarian and his white evangelical supporters.

Donald Trump Invites Bullied Joshua Trump,11, to State of the Union Speech

Bully-in-Chief

“There will be many Trumps in the House chamber for the president`s State of the Union address Tuesday night – but one Trump is not in the family. He`s Joshua Trump, an 11-year-old boy from Delaware who was bullied over the last name he shares with the president. President Trump and first lady Melania Trump invited the sixth grader to attend as their guest.”

CBS News

Indeed, there will be many Trumps in the House chamber for the president`s State of the Union address Tuesday night, but Tiffany Trump, the so-called bimbo of the Trump clan, has exercised remarkable wisdom by rarely appearing in public with her notorious family, and I doubt she will be in attendance tonight.

One Trump who`s not in the family, Joshua Trump, is the special guest of President Trump and first lady Melania Trump. He`ll be there by virtue of being bullied over the surname he shares with the bully-in-chief.

The boy was bullied over his name so much that for a while his parents homeschooled him. When he`s seen on nationwide TV tonight as the special guest of the short-fingered vulgarian, not only will he be continued to be bullied by his classmates, but he will be bullied online by millions.

Inviting Joshua Trump to the State of the Union speech makes as much sense as a teacher presenting a certificate of cleanliness, politeness and good grammar to a bullied student. I predict that Joshua will be homeschooled until he graduates from high school.

Shame on the Trumps, especially Melania, for using the child in such a cynical way. Melania has made anti-bullying her pet crusade, surely there`s a special place reserved in hell for such a hypocrite.

Read More:

https://www.cbsnews.com/news/state-of-the-union-2019-president-trump-invites-joshua-trump-delaware-boy-who-was-bullied-for-his-name-to-speech-tonight/

White House Official: Donald Trump’s Orange Complexion a Result of Good Genes

Orange Racist

A senior administration official told the New York Times that Donald Trump`s complexion is the result of good genes.

The official spoke to the Times on the condition of anonymity, apparently he was too embarrassed to be credited with such an outrageous lie.

I must concede that there`s a remote chance that Trump`s orange complexion may be the result of a mutant gene, or perhaps his real father is an Oompa-Loompa.

You don`t have to be a stable genius or a dermatologist to deduce that Trump`s pumpkin-colored face is the result of spending hours on a tanning bed. The bright white half-moons under his eyes are a dead giveaway, can anyone say tanning goggles?

In her tell-all book former aide Omarosa Manigualt Newman said that her boss used a tanning bed often.

The default mode of every Trump administration official is to lie, every statement or tweet that emanates from the White House must be taken with a grain of salt.

Of course Trump`s orange complexion can be attributed to good genes, and he`s also in excellent physical health, of sound mind, and he`s blessed with the greatest brain in history.

Donald Trump Tweets Support for Bible Literacy Classes in Public Schools

Noted Bible Scholar

“President Donald Trump is endorsing a variety of Bible Literacy classes that have been introduced by state lawmakers across the country, including in Virginia.

`Numerous states introducing Bible Literacy classes, giving students the option of studying the Bible,` Trump wrote in a Monday morning tweet. `Starting to make a turn back? Great!`”

WHSV

Donald Trump who went to Liberty University, a prominent Christian evangelical university, to deliver a speech in which he cited “Two Corinthians 3: 17” is endorsing Bible Literacy classes – how rich!

I realize most of my readers are heathen so let me explain that for a Christian to refer to 2 Corinthians as “Two Corinthians” is equivalent to somebody who pretends to be a physics major saying that he can see black holes when he puts on his x-ray glasses.

If anyone needs to take a course in Bible literacy it`s Trump, perhaps Mike Pence can extricate his head from Trump`s rectum long enough to teach him a thing or two about the Bible.

The vice president and members of the Cabinet hold a weekly circle jerk disguised as a Bible study, Trump would join these wankers if he really cared about Bible literacy.

The Bible should be anathema in public schools, although the King James Version of the Bible is a literary masterpiece, and it could be taught as an optional course for students interested in English literature.

The only time Trump cracks open the Bible is when he uses it as a cover to hide from his wife the fact that he`s actually reading Penthouse Forum.

Read More:

https://www.whsv.com/content/news/Pres-Trump-tweets-in-support-of-Bible-literacy-classes-504983032.html

Why Did Donald Trump Have a Bandage on His Hand?

Wanker

“President Donald Trump is often called thin-skinned. It`s usually not meant literally.

But the back of Trump`s right hand was covered with an adhesive bandage during a Thursday trip to McAllen, Texas, with blood visibly seeping through the dressing. His hand was similarly bandaged again on Monday as he departed for a trip to New Orleans.

Armchair medics studying photos that circulated online this week leapt to dramatic conclusions. But the White House said on Tuesday that Trump sustained the injury while playing with his 12-year-old son.”

Politico

Americans are fascinated by Donald Trump`s grotesquely small hands, we are so familiar with the topography of his hands that we notice every liver spot. Naturally, we noticed that his right hand was covered with an adhesive bandage.

The White House claims that Trump sustained the injury while playing with his 12-year-old son, but we have learned to take every statement by the Trump administration with a grain of salt.

I don`t think Trump would recognize his young son, and I doubt he has ever played with him.

Social media has weighed in with dramatics reasons for his bandaged hand. So what on Earth caused Trump`s injury? Here are my more credible explanations:

Melania scratched his loathsome hand when he tried to cop a feel. Trump would be well-advised to stick to groping Ivanka.

It wasn`t Barron that Trump was roughhousing with but Mike Pence, and Pence accidentally scratched him during their sex play.

The bandage covers a boil. Every time Trump tells one thousand new lies the Almighty smites him with a boil, and his fat ass is already completely covered with boils.

The bandage covers a bite mark. Kellyanne Conway was sucking on Trump`s hand to drink his blood, believe it or not, without his blood she would look even more loathsome and decrepit.

But enough of Trump`s hand, it`s another part of his anatomy that I would love to injure, namely delivering a solid kick to his fat behind.

https://www.politico.com/story/2019/01/15/trump-health-bloody-hand-bandage-1102245

Donald Trump Vs Joe Biden is a Vomit-Inducing Nightmare

Groper of little girls

“President Donald Trump called Joe Biden weak and said he is not worried about a potential challenge from the former vice president in the 2020 presidential race, during a phone interview with Fox News` Jeanine Pirro Saturday night.”

CNN

At this early stage of the 2020 presidential campaign former Vice President Joe Biden is the leading contender for the Democratic nomination. But considering Biden is 76 and Trump is 72, is doubtful that these surly septuagenarians will live long enough to battle it out in 2020.

There is no love lost between Biden and Trump, on occasion their rhetoric has included threats of physical confrontation. In March 2018 during a speech at the University of Miami Biden said:

They asked me if I`d like to debate this gentleman, and I said `no.` I said, `If we were in high school, I`d take him behind the gym and beat the hell out of him.` “

Trump, the infamous counterpuncher, immediately responded on Twitter:

Crazy Joe Biden is trying to act like a tough guy. Actually, he is weak, both mentally and physically, and yet he threatens me, for the second time, with physical assault. He doesn`t know me, but he would go down fast and hard, crying all the way. Don`t threaten people Joe!

I would pay a small fortune to watch a pay-per-view death match between Crazy Joe Biden and Sociopath Donald Trump.

They would of course require a five minute break in between rounds to change their diapers and for oxygen therapy.

Trump would plant prepubescent girls on the front row to distract the notorious fondler of little girls, and Biden would seat strippers and porn stars to distract the notorious sexual predator.

Even though Trump is younger than Biden he can`t go the distance because he`s so damn fat, he would have to engineer a way to dispatch his opponent quickly.

Trump is an expert at trash talking, and he could attempt to trigger a stroke or a heart attack by attacking Biden verbally throughout the match. Some examples:

Hey Joe, your few gaffes have cost you dearly, but my loyal base finds it endearing when I spit out gaffes like a machine gun on Twitter and during my speeches.

Hey Joe, sorry your son died of terminal brain cancer, but at least he didn`t have a reputation of groping little girls.

Sorry for the mean nature of these taunts, but I`m channeling the short-fingered vulgarian.

If there`s a God in heaven Biden would die of a heart attack as a result of Trump`s cruel barbs, and Trump would die from sheer physical exhaustion.

The last thing I want to see is Trump and Biden slug it out in the 2020 presidential election.

Despite Mike Pence’s Obsequiousness Donald Trump Treats Him Like Dirt

Mr. Brown Nose

When a woman signs a contract to work as an exotic dancer at a strip club she knows that she`s in for world of humiliation besides the inherent degradation of exposing her body parts to leering and ogling men for a few dollars.

She won`t have union representation, health insurance or any fringe benefits. The owner of the club will expect her to perform lap dances and other sexual favors for paying customers, ultimately she`s as disposable as a dirty and ripped pair of thongs.

When a person accepts a position in the Trump administration he knows that he is in for a world of humiliation. We have witnessed a parade of captains of industry, educators and politicians accept positions in Trump`s administration only to resign or be fired months later with their dignity and reputation in shatters. In Trump`s world respected career politicians and even generals are as disposable as one of his wives who has reached her expiration date.

Vice President Mike Pence is no exception to this rule despite his obsequiousness and servile attitude towards his master, he has repeatedly been humiliated by him.

Trump`s treatment of Pence during the shutdown is just the latest example. Trump initially signaled that he would back a funding bill without money for his precious wall, dispatching Pence to the Senate to tell Republicans that he was on board.

But as he is wont to do Trump later reversed himself after Ann Coulter and other far right loonies ripped him a new a-hole, leaving Pence looking pitiful, powerless and pathetic.

When the government shut down, Trump again dispatched Pence to the Senate, and he worked out a compromise deal with the Democrats of only $2.5 billion in wall funding.

But Trump made his loyal second-in-command look like a fool again, bellowing at a cabinet meeting that he wouldn`t accept anything less than $5.6 billion for his wall.

I have no sympathy for a stripper who is treated like dirt as a strip club, she knew the humiliations she would suffer in her chosen profession, and I have no sympathy for anyone who accepts a position in the White House, they knew full well that the stable genius is the mayor of Crazytown.

Donald Trump’s Oval Office Address: A Nation Vomits! Video!

Wanker

On Tuesday night Donald Trump delivered his first Oval Office address, the prime time speech was dedicated to his obsession of building a tower in Moscow, my bad, I mean building a wall on our southern border.

His words are of no consequence, the only things that ever emanate from his sphincter-shaped mouth are little white lies, huge ugly lies and ridiculous lies. I might as well try to parse the meanings of his farts after he gets an upset stomach from eating too many tacos and milkshakes.

Trump didn`t deviate from the script on the teleprompter, therefore he didn`t make any headlines for uttering idiotic statements as he is wont to do when he speaks extemporaneously.

There was only one stationary camera, and I had no choice but to focus on Trump`s face, and what a revolting countenance it is: the urine-colored cotton candy hair, the aforementioned sphincter-shaped mouth, the orange complexion, his double chin, and the pasty white circles around his eyes. The horror, the horror!

Although the words Trump spoke don`t matter, the way he spoke does warrant attention. Trump sometimes took no pauses between phrases, as if he wanted to get through with the damn thing as quickly as possible. Let`s just say that he`s not a master of phrasing like the late great Frank Sinatra.

Then there`s that annoying sniffling that always makes an appearance when the great bloviator makes an important speech. They say Trump doesn`t drink or do drugs, but I wouldn`t be surprised if he likes coke the drug as much as he likes Coke the soda.

If you didn`t watch the speech last night, and you have a masochistic streak, here`s a link:

Photo Credit: Wikipedia

Rep. Rashida Tlaib: Impeach the Expletive-Deleted

Hero

On Thursday, Michigan Rep. Rashida Tlaib told her supporters about a heartwarming conversation she had with her son:

“Look, Mama, you won. Bullies don`t win,” Tlaib said, quoting her son. “And I said, Baby, they don`t, because we`re gonna go in there and impeach the motherfuc*er.”

Trump, in a classic case of the pot calling the kettle black, condemned Tlaib`s comments as “highly disrespectful.”

Trump had the gall to trumpet:

“This is a person I don`t know, I assume she`s new. I think she dishonored herself and dishonored her family using language like that in front of her son and whoever else was there.”

The short-fingered vulgarian and his white evangelical supporters would be well-advised to shut the fu*k up, lest they rightfully be accused of being hypocritical.

Kudos to Rep. Tlaib for speaking truth to power in a language that the obscenity in the White House understands.

Rep. Tlaib didn`t dishonor herself or her family, quite the opposite she gave us hope that the new Congress includes a representative committed to impeaching the motherfuc*er.

Harry Reid: Donald Trump is Amoral

Amoral Bastard

“Former Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid called President Donald Trump an amoral person and said he`s the worst President we`ve ever had in an interview with The New York Times Magazine published Wednesday.

`Trump is an interesting person. He is not immoral but is amoral,` Reid, a Nevada Democrat, said in the interview. `Amoral is when you shoot someone in the head, it doesn`t make a difference. No conscience.`

Reid, who retired in 2017 at the end of his fifth term, told the magazine that Trump `is without question the worst president we`ve ever had.`”

CNN

Harry Reid the former Senate Majority Leader and former boxer rarely pulls his punches, and he delivered a haymaker punch to Donald Trump`s reputation in an interview with the New York Times Magazine.

Reid has terminal pancreatic cancer and he will soon die, so he held nothing back in his devastating assessment of Trump.

Reid is spot on: Trump is amoral. He lacks a moral compass, he`s unconcerned with the rightness or wrongness of his actions, and he cares only about how they will benefit him.

I would go a step further than Reid, Trump is a sociopath. He`s totally unconcerned about how his draconian immigration policies will affect poor people dreaming of a better life in America because he has no empathy for anyone, and certainly not for people of color.

If Trump shot and killed someone in the middle of Fifth Avenue he wouldn`t feel any remorse or regret, he`s a soulless monster.

Trump is an aberration, a vulgar and racist sociopath who craps on social norms, the Constitution, the teachings of the Bible, and the rule of law.

But what about the 30-something percent of the American electorate that would support him even if he wantonly shot someone in the middle of Fifth Avenue?

We`re not talking about just one sick and twisted individual, but about millions of white evangelicals who put political expediency above the religious views they profess to hold dear.

I pray Trump will be impeached and removed from office in the near future, but how do we as a society rid ourselves of millions of degenerate white evangelicals?

Read More:

https://www.cnn.com/2019/01/02/politics/harry-reid-trump/index.html

Donald Trump’s Incredibly Shrinking Wall

Wanker

Donald Trump is suffering from an embarrassing shrinkage problem that only George Constanza could understand. I`m not referring to the puny presidential pecker, if that worm shrank you would need a microscope to see it.

I`m talking about Trump`s incredibly shrinking wall, during the presidential campaign he spoke of it in such lofty terms, that his base imagined a colossal structure that would rival the Great Wall of China.

Trump described his proposed wall as 1,000 miles long, made of concrete slabs, and rising 35 to 40 feet in the air.

And of course he repeated ad nauseam that Mexico would pay for the damned thing. Mexico will erect a phallic symbol taller than the Washington Monument in honor of Trump before it finances his boondoggle.

Trump has given up on the idea of having our Southern neighbor pay for the wall, and now his is holding nearly 1 million federal employees hostage in a bid to have taxpayers fund his monstrosity.

Trump`s rhetoric on his proposed wall between the United States and Mexico has changed, nowadays he`s just as likely to call it a fence, steel slabs or a barrier as he is to refer to it as a wall.

The mighty 1,000 mile wall has been downsized to a paltry 500 miles, and he might eventually settle for a 10 mile bead curtain, made in China.

The Democrats shouldn`t give an inch, let Trump explain to his fanatical base that the wall was just a rhetorical device, and that it will never be built.

The World Will End Not With a Bang or a Whimper But With a Trump Tweet

Stable Genius

In 2018 Donald Trump famously referred to himself as a “stable genius,” but his words and actions manifestly prove thats he`s the polar opposite: an unstable fucking moron.

In fact, Trump is so unstable and volatile, and he relies only on his own counsel, that many fear that he might start a nuclear war if a foreign leader offends his tender sensibilities.

Fortunately, contrary to popular belief there is no red button that our lunatic commander-in-chief can press to usher in Armageddon. He can`t just push a button and nuclear-tipped missiles will fly to Moscow, Beijing, Ottawa or Paris. Cadet Bone Spurs can`t unilaterally launch a nuclear strike, he requires military personnel to carry out such an order.

However, the putative Leader of the Free World can start a nuclear war with a tweet. We must never forget that when tensions with North Korea were at a fever pitch he practically goaded Kim Jong-un into striking Guam with a missile.

The world may end, my friends, not because of geopolitical tensions between the Russian Federation and the United States or due to economic tensions between American and China – the world may end simply because Trump`s tiny fingers pecking away at the Twitter machine ticked-off a mad dictator with a nuclear arsenal.

Happy New Year!