It’s not even spring and the world’s greatest democracy has now chosen the presidential nominees for the two major parties: Republican Donald Trump and Democrat Joe Biden.

The GOP and the Democratic Party have a stranglehold on the presidential selection process, and there’s zero chance that a Third-Party candidate will emerge to seriously compete against these despicable and senile candidates.

This tragic state of American politics can best be demonstrated in a metaphor:

Imagine that both parties are holding political events in Las Vegas at the same time, and naturally all the brothels are doing thriving business. You walk into a cathouse, and the Madam tells you that only two past their prime working girls are available:

Sleepy Joanna: she has a second job doing grannie porn videos in order to make ends meet. She’s emaciated and you fear she may have a heart attack doing the dirty deed, and you wonder about your legal liability. It’s likely that she will forget your name, and blurt out the wrong name when she pretends to climax.

Dorky Donna: she has a second job doing BBW porn in order to pay the bills. She’s fat as a pig and you fear that she may suffer a stroke while you’re knocking boots. You’re certain that the narcissist cow will scream her own name when she comes, and who wants to put up with that shit? 

The madam of the house of ill repute is waiting for you to make your decision, and you finally decide that you’d rather put your privates through a meat grinder than have sex with either of those sorry prostitutes.

Who am I voting for: The senile Biden is better than the senile human excrement Trump, but maybe I should just kill myself.