“Authorities in Florida are asking for the public`s help finding a large $25,000 swan sculpture stolen by a naked man.

The Polk County Sheriff`s Office said surveillance cameras at Lakeland Cold Storage were recording just before 5 a.m. May 19 when a naked man carrying a 5-gallon bucket squeezed through a gap in the fence.
`Do you call that buck naked, or bucket naked?` the sheriff`s office quipped in a Facebook post.”

UPI

A sordid story involving a buck naked burglar, a bucket, and a $25,000 swan sculpture could only happen in Florida. I`m just surprised that the stolen item wasn`t a $2 plastic pink flamingo.

The burglar must have balls the size of bowling balls, it takes real balls to squeeze through a gap in a chain link fence when you are naked.

The burglar has been nabbed, but the swan is still missing. The naked burglar probably sold in on eBay for $20 so he could buy some meth.

God have mercy on Floridians.

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