canada

Clueless Canadian Cops Give Dude Ticket for Singing Along With His Jam: Video

“St-Laurent man`s love of music is proving costly after he said he was given a $149 ticket for singing `Gonna Make You Sweat (Everybody Dance Now)` while driving.

On Sept. 27, Taoufik Moalla was on his way to get a bottle of water from Provigo. He was headed down St. Croix, cheerfully singing along to the 1990 C+C Music Factory hit, when he heard a police siren behind him.
`I was thinking they wanted to pass, but they called on the speaker `Please go to the right side,` said Moalla. `I stopped and four police came, two on each side, and checked the inside of the car. Then they asked me if I screamed. I said no, I was just singing.`
Police checked his license and registration and came back with the ticket for screaming in his car.”
CTV News
Y`all know what happens when your jam comes on the radio, you get jiggy with it, and while the music is on you are oblivious to your surroundings.
I can`t dance worth a lick, but when my jam comes on (Bob Marley`s Jammin) I`m going to dance like a mother regardless if I`m in my shower, cubicle at work, or in my ride.
Trying to stop a person from grooving when his jam comes on is like trying to stop one of Pavolv`s dogs from salivating when he sees his bowl brimming with food.

Those clueless Canadian cops need to chill the hell out, smoke some weed and listen to Bob Marley, how dare they give Moalla a ticket for singing along with his jam.
Read More:
http://montreal.ctvnews.ca/man-given-149-ticket-for-singing-90s-dance-song-while-driving-1.3643520

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Canadian Dude Mows Lawn With Tornado Behind Him

“A Canadian man`s commitment to lawn care is going viral after his wife snapped a photo of him mowing the grass with a tornado looming behind him.

Cecilia Wessels posted a photo to Facebook that she said was snapped Friday as a tornado passed near their Three Hills, Alberta home.
The photo shows Wessels` husband, Theunis, mowing the lawn with the tornado in the background.

Wessels later explained the tornado was not as close as it appeared to be in the photo and was moving away from their home at the time.”

UPI

My thoughts:

Tornadoes in Canada?

Talk about rearranging the deck chairs on the Titanic.

I`m surprised you can actually grow a lawn in the vast frigid wasteland that is Canada.

Perhaps this man was tired of his meaningless life in Canada and was seeking to commit suicide by tornado.

Or he could be one of those anal-retentive wankers who spends more time maintaining his lawn than he does maintaining his automobile and personal relationships.

Maybe his wife is such a nagging witch that he`d rather be outside mowing his lawn with a tornado bearing down on him, than inside with her.

He claimed that the tornado was actually moving away from his house. Hello! Tornadoes are unpredictable, they can turn on a dime.

After reading this story I`m grateful I don`t:

Live in Canada, am obsessed with my lawn, or have a nagging wife.

Pic of wanker mowing his lawn:

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/06/04/Canadian-man-calmly-mows-lawn-with-tornado-behind-him/8911496584725/?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=1

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Canadian Dude Crazy for Mozzarella Sticks

“A delivery receipt from a Toronto eatery is going viral after the customer used the comments section to defend their need for mozzarella sticks.

The receipt from Fresco`s Fish & Chips, which went viral thanks to a photo posted to Reddit, shows the customer ordered three servings of mozzarella sticks, in addition to fried pickles, slaw, and Diet Coke.

The receipt`s comments section reads: Yes — I meant to order 3 mozzarella sticks. Please don`t judge me. I`m having a bad week and was so excited they were back on the menu.”

UPI

Unless the delivery person was renowned health food nut Michelle Obama, the customer shouldn`t have felt compelled to justify his order of three entrees of mozzarella sticks totaling $21.

Nothing satisfies the belly and soothes the spirit quite like pigging out on your favorite comfort food. Sometimes I order two Whoppers, supersized fries, and a Diet Coke, and I don`t apologize.

However, I would feel a need to justify ordering fried pickles. Is that Canadian delicacy an acquired taste, kind of like loving Nickleback?

I love me some mozzarella sticks, but if I ate fried pickles I would keep it on the down low.

Read More:

http://www.upi.com/Odd_News/2017/03/10/Toronto-delivery-customer-Dont-judge-me-for-mozzarella-sticks/6791489177523/?utm_source=sec&utm_campaign=sl&utm_medium=4

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

President Donald Trump Vs Prime Minister Justin Trudeau! Who Won the Handshake Battle?

“President Donald Trump has a weird way of shaking hands. His herky-jerky grappling style sometimes makes it look like he`s fighting with the other person, and maybe even trying to rip their arm out of its socket. But Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau appeared prepared for an uncomfortable greeting when he visited the White House on Monday.

A video of Trump welcoming Trudeau shows the prime minister quickly grasping the president`s shoulder with his left arm, seemingly bracing for a potential pull. Trudeau then brings the handshake close and toward his center, cutting off Trump`s leverage and ensuring that his shoulder remains intact.”

Huffington Post

Donald Trump is a WWE (World Wrestling Entertainment) fan, a friend of WWE CEO Vince McMahon, and he even hosted a couple of WrestleMania events.Trump was inducted into the celebrity wing of the WWE Celebrity Hall of Fame.

Trump has introduced a wrestling submission hold into the world of politics with great success. It`s not the Huge Kiss of Death, although if Trump kissed an opponent with his sphincter-shaped mouth it might kill him. It`s not the Genital Grasp of Domination whereby the Donald grabs a person`s genitals until he or she cries “uncle.”

It`s the Presidential Handshake of Death, typically Trump greets a world leader by gripping his hand, jerking it toward him almost ripping the arm out of its socket, rendering him a quivering mass of jelly. Even strongmen like Israeli Prime Minister Bibi Netanyahu have been no match for Donald`s submission hold.

Trump finally met his match, and it wasn`t North Korea`s dictator or Iran`s Supreme Leader who got the best of him, it was, believe it or not, the pretty boy Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau.

Watch and marvel as Trudeau counters and neutralizes Trump`s signature submission hold.

Read More:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/entry/justin-trudeau-trump_us_58a1dc96e4b03df370d8a29b

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