Mitt Romney Said Donald Trump was a GumBall Machine, no He’s a Condom Vending Machine

“Sen. Mitt Romney (R-Utah) joked during an appearance on NBC’s ‘Meet the Press’ Sunday that former President Trump was a ‘human gumball machine’ due to his tendency to give unfiltered remarks.

‘A thought or a notion comes in, and it comes out of his mouth. There’s not a lot of filter that goes on. There’s not a lot of, ‘What’s the implication?’ No, no. He just says whatever.’”


Gumball machines make me nostalgic for simpler more innocent times when a penny wasn’t just dead weight in your pocket, and a child could insert a penny into the base of a gumball machine, turn the handle and a shiny gumball would be deposited into a chute at the bottom of the wonderful machine.

There is nothing about Donald Trump that reminds me of innocence, truth be told he’s a steaming pile of human excrement.

Mitt Romney doesn’t have much of an imagination, a more accurate metaphor to describe the vulgar sociopath is a condom dispenser at a Greyhound station restroom.

You meet a sketchy travel blogger while riding the bus, and she’s kind of unkempt but kind of hot, so you make plans to hook up when you reach your common destination. So, you enter the restroom with trepidation, knowing what you will encounter: urine on the floor, feces encrusted in the toilet bowl, and graffiti on the walls. You approach the condom vending machine, afraid to touch it lest you catch a disease. But you’re horny and buy a condom, grateful it didn’t dispense an extra small Trump condom.

I wouldn’t touch Trump with a ten-foot pole. Screw Romney! Trump isn’t a gumball machine, he’s a damn condom vending machine.