“President-elect Donald Trump has a particularly fragile and easily bruised ego. He doesn`t like it when you make fun of his teeny-weenie hands, and now The Donald wants the media to stop publishing unflattering photos of him. Well, we have some good news for the president-elect! The people are spreading the word about how much Trump hates those pics on social media!”

Fusion

We know two things about Donald Trump: He has an enormous ego and tiny hands, ergo a minuscule penis. When a pundit, comic or Twitter troll makes fun of the Donald`s physical appearance he goes ballistic.

During an off the record meeting with TV anchors and executives, the blowhard billionaire berated NBC executives for using unflattering photographs of him.

You`d think that a man who has billions in the bank, a hot wife, worldwide celebrity and has been elected Leader of the Free World, wouldn`t care if the media used unflattering photos, but it really bugs him.

If Trump loses sleep over a television network using less than flattering photos, imagine his dismay if a homemade sex tape featuring Trump`s tiny pecker was posted online.

I figure there`s got to be a Trump sex tape, it goes without saying that a man as egotistical as Trump has filmed himself having sex with a model or actress.

Trump could be blackmailed into doing anything, he would betray his country to prevent the world from seeing his micropenis.

For the sake of our national security I hope and pray that I`m wrong, and that there is no Donald Trump sex tape.