Donald Trump, the twice-impeached, two-time loser in the presidential popular vote has been hinting that he’s going to run for president again in 2024.

Trump finds it impossible to ignore the spotlight, and what better way to become relevant again and make headlines than by running for president?

Barring an unforeseen illness, he will run again, the only question is: Who’s going to be his running mate?

I can tell you who it’s not going to be: Mike Pence. Trump has never forgiven Pence for refusing to overturn the election results during the counting of the Electoral College votes on January 6, 2021. Neither has his base who would rather hang him than endorse him as Trump’s running mate.

A blow-up doll would make the perfect vice president for Trump for the following reasons: It doesn’t have a backbone; it’s an ideal sex companion for when Melania has a headache, and she aways has a headache; and it’s impervious to his violent mood swings and childish behavior.

That would be a real fun ticket, but it’s not going to happen. So, who will it be:

South Carolina Senator Tim Scott can always be counted on to stand by his side with his Uncle Tom smile and subservient demeanor. He would always be at the ready to shine his shoes, change his diapers, and blow-dry his urine-colored hair.

Texas Senator Ted Cruz would be another excellent choice. Trump knows that he can make fun of his homely wife, accuse his father of dastardly deeds and impregnate his young daughter and retain his loyalty and devotion.

Florida Governor Ron DeSantis would be the dream ticket, he’s wildly popular with MAGA loyalists, but on the down side he has a smidgen of integrity and he isn’t as willing to debase himself as Scott or Cruz.

If Trump is willing to choose someone who won’t be a total pushover, he will make DeSantis his running mate.