Unipiper Keeps Portland Weird by Shoveling Snow While Riding Unicycle

“Oregon`s Unipiper proved `Keep Portland Weird` is an all-seasons struggle when he was filmed shoveling snow while riding his unicycle and playing bagpipes.

The Unipiper, aka Brian Kidd, posted a video to YouTube showing him shoveling snow from the sidewalk in his Portland neighborhood.
Kidd, whose unicycle multitasking videos have repeatedly gone viral, rides his unicycle and plays `The Imperial March` from Star Wars on his flame-shooting bagpipes while clearing the snow.”


I love snow, it turns even the most gritty urban neighborhood into a virginal winter wonderland. But after a few moments of gazing with wonder and amazement at the beautiful scenery, I think to myself: Damn, I have to shovel my driveway!

Clearing a driveway is a precarious task, if you exert too much energy you risk slipping and cracking your skull. That`s why I usually pay a neighborhood kid a few dollars to do it for me.

The unipiper is a wanker plain and simple: How dare he show up average males, who can`t walk and chew gum at the same time, by shoveling snow while riding his unicycle and playing flaming bagpipes.

The unipiper should consider keeping Portland weird by jumping off a skyscraper while clad in diapers and playing a flute.

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Kilt-wearing Santa From Hell Rides a Unicycle in Portland: Video

“An Oregon man was filmed doing his part to keep Portland weird by dressing up as a Scottish Santa and playing flaming bagpipes while riding a unicycle.

Brian Kidd, aka The Unipiper, posted a video to YouTube showing him ringing in the holiday season in a festively eccentric fashion.”


A kilt-wearing Santa riding a unicycle and playing flaming bagpipes is wrong on so many levels.

Only in Portland, a city renowned for its weird vibe, could you get away with pulling this stunt, in any other city this man would have been tarred, feathered and kicked to the curb.

Anyone riding a unicycle is an attention-seeking whore, the kilt and the flaming bagpipes are just overkill.

A Santa wearing a kilt is an abomination; I hope and pray Kidd gets run over by reindeer.

Merry Christmas to my readers in Portland and all over the world!

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes