Mike Pence’s Nose is Permanently Affixed to Donald Trump’s Rectum

On Sunday, the New York Times reported that Donald Trump had invited representatives of the Taliban to Camp David for peace talks over the objections of some top advisers, including National Security Advisor John Bolton and Vice President Mike Pence. 


In response Trump what he does best, lie. He tweeted:


“A lot of Fake News is being reported that I overruled the VP and various advisers on a potential Camp David meeting with the Taliban. This Story is False! I always think it is good to meet and talk, but in this case I decided not to.”


Pence and Trump are joined at the hip, or perhaps it would be more accurate to state that the VP’s nose is permanently affixed to his boss’s rectum. Therefore it comes as a surprise that Pence would disagree with Trump about such an important matter, but it’s not surprising Pence would deny that they disagreed. A parish priest is more likely to publicly disagree with the Pope, than Pence is to publicly declare that he doesn’t share the same opinion as the racist-in-chief on any issue.


Before you could say “Mike Pence has the brownest nose in Washington” Pence replied to to Trump’s tweet”


“That’s Absolutely Right Mr. President. More Fake News! The Dishonest Media never contacted our office before running with this story and if they had, we would have told them I FULLY support your decision.”


Notice the sniveling sycophant channeled the stable genius in his tweet, adopting the president’s nomenclature and random capitalization.

What a spineless coward! The only thing that reeks more than Pence’s nose is his soul!

Donald Trump’s Tweets: The First Rough Draft of History

The late David Carr, the New York Times culture and media critic famously quipped that Trump’s tweets are the first rough draft of contemporary American history.

“Rough draft” is an understatement, Trump doesn’t employ any editors or fact checkers to correct his syntax, spelling errors and outright lies. Even though Trump is cognizant that his tweets can rock the stock market, ignite political dissent at home and abroad, and cause citizens to doubt his sanity, he promiscuously tweets without giving it any thought or consideration.

Before a reporter’s story is published by the Washington Post or the New York Times it’s vetted by lawyers for any possible legal liabilities, editors for grammatical mistakes and fact checkers for truth and veracity. Trump, the most influential publisher in the world by virtue of his Tweeter feed, answers to no one and tweets away like a glutton farting away after a huge banquet.

It’s not the broadcast TV evening newscasts or the cable news outlets that directs or controls the news cycles, it’s Trump’s Twitter machine. Of course, the major news outlets and bloggers are complicit in Trump’s stranglehold on the news cycle, but how can we be blamed for commenting on the tweets of the Leader of the Free World?

One day Trump’s tweets will be intensely studied by historians, educators, and students of the media. They will surely wonder how the confluence of the rise of social media and the rise of a populist racist almost destroyed American democracy.

Donald Trump’s Twitter Feed Gives Us a Glimpse Into His Sick Mind


“It’s hard to even imagine President Donald Trump’s Twitter addiction getting worse, but we may be living through just that right now. Consider that over the past 24 hours, Trump has tweeted (and retweeted) 52 things. In a 30-minute span on Monday night, he retweeted 24 items — about nine different topics and from 15 people.”

CNN

I tweet almost as much as Donald Trump, but I’m not the Leader of the Free World with a pile of existential threats to society in my in box.

The stable genius has to answer to the American public for wasting his time posting mean-spirited and deceitful tweets, while I have to answer only to my employer since I do most of my tweeting during my work hours.

Trump’s Twitter feed is a window into the fuc*ing moron’s warped mind, and reading his tweets on a daily basis gives us an indication if it’s finally time to put him in a straightjacket or at least bind his tiny fingers.

What did Trump tweet about over the past 24 hours? Who gives a rat’s ass, it’s just the typical rantings of a diseased mind!

Although it’s noteworthy that that many of Trump’s posts are retweets, he’s too lazy to come up with original content. You’d be well advised to unfollow Trump on Twitter, why not follow me instead @robertpaulreyes Read More:
https://www.cnn.com/2019/04/23/politics/donald-trump-twitter/index.html

The World Will End Not With a Bang or a Whimper But With a Trump Tweet

Stable Genius

In 2018 Donald Trump famously referred to himself as a “stable genius,” but his words and actions manifestly prove thats he`s the polar opposite: an unstable fucking moron.

In fact, Trump is so unstable and volatile, and he relies only on his own counsel, that many fear that he might start a nuclear war if a foreign leader offends his tender sensibilities.

Fortunately, contrary to popular belief there is no red button that our lunatic commander-in-chief can press to usher in Armageddon. He can`t just push a button and nuclear-tipped missiles will fly to Moscow, Beijing, Ottawa or Paris. Cadet Bone Spurs can`t unilaterally launch a nuclear strike, he requires military personnel to carry out such an order.

However, the putative Leader of the Free World can start a nuclear war with a tweet. We must never forget that when tensions with North Korea were at a fever pitch he practically goaded Kim Jong-un into striking Guam with a missile.

The world may end, my friends, not because of geopolitical tensions between the Russian Federation and the United States or due to economic tensions between American and China – the world may end simply because Trump`s tiny fingers pecking away at the Twitter machine ticked-off a mad dictator with a nuclear arsenal.

Happy New Year!

Twitter Purges Site of Suspicious Accounts

“Twitter users across the globe may see a drop in their followers this week as the social media platform purges the site of suspicious accounts.”

U.S. News and World Report

America is a classless society, we don`t have a religious caste system like India or a social class system like England. When we apply for a job our prospective employer doesn`t care if our ancestors arrived on the Mayflower, or if our parents are members of an exclusive golf resort. Ideally any employer will be concerned only with our education, experience, wisdom and skills.

However in this digital age any employer would be derelict in his duties if he didn`t investigate our social media profile. Whenever I apply for a job I assume that I will be googled and that my Twitter and Facebook accounts will be scrutinized.

A social media presence is more important than a social pedigree or financial success or lack thereof, and it`s incumbent upon us to ensure that there`s nothing negative on our social media sites.

I`m not quite an anal-retentive as Millennials in regularly updating my social media accounts, but for a Baby Boomer I have an impressive presence on the Internet. I have published political essays online since 1998, and thousands of my articles, for good or ill, are available online for anyone to read. I also have a Twitter feed, a Facebook page and a Linkedin account.

I was dismayed this morning when I checked my Twitter feed and discovered that I had lost about two hundred followers. Even though I take Twitter`s word that they were purging the site of suspicious accounts, i.e. trolls and bots, I still feel like I just checked my checking account and discovered that I have $200 less than I expected.

But I`m probably not as shocked as celebrities who have millions of fake accounts, for example a survey has shown that more than a quarter of Trump`s followers are not real people. I just hope that Twitter purged the accounts of celebrities as thoroughly as they did those of regular folks.

My precipitous drop in Twitter followers was a slap on the face, if you enjoy reading my essays I hope you will empathize with me, and follow me on Twitter.

Read More:
https://www.usnews.com/news/national-news/articles/2018-07-12/twitter-to-purge-site-of-suspicious-accounts

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Trump’s Twitter Typos

Twitter is my favorite social media platform, and I fire off more than a dozen tweets on a daily basis. It`s easy to make a typo when I`m angrily responding to a tweet of someone blasting one of my articles, but unless it`s a flagrant typo I usually don`t bother to correct it. My pet peeve is anal-retentive wankers whose panties get in a twist over punctuation or typos in a tweet.

However I`m not the Leader of the Free World, and I have thousands not millions of followers. A typo on my Twitter feed will most likely go unnoticed, but a comma in the wrong place or a typo can cause an international incident if you`re the President of the United States.

I don`t think I`m being anal-retentive when I criticize Trump for his grammar-challenged and typo-ridden tweets. When Trump sends a tweet at an ungodly hour in the moment, he should wake up whoever he`s sleeping with and ask her to check his spelling, punctuation and grammar.

But then again even if Trump`s tweets were free of typos and punctuation errors, they are still the ramblings of a sick and twisted mind.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com

Twitter Has No Intentions of Banning Donald Trump

“Some Twitter users have called, repeatedly, for the social network to block President Trump’s account — but a new statement from Twitter essentially says that is not going to happen.

Twitter has previously responded to complaints about Trump’s account by saying that certain users’ tweets have a “newsworthiness” value that makes it important to stay online and inform the network’s global conversation. Its Friday statement expanded on that idea, though this latest explanation did not mention Trump by name.

“Elected world leaders play a critical role in that conversation because of their outsized impact on our society,” the post said. “Blocking a world leader from Twitter or removing their controversial tweets would hide important information people should be able to see and debate. It would also not silence that leader, but it would certainly hamper necessary discussion around their words and actions.”

Washington Post

There is no question that President Donald Trump’s tweets violate Twitter’s terms of service, and if he was a retired trucker firing off toxic tweets from his trailer home, instead of the Leader of the Free World he would have been permanently banned from the social media behemoth.

Every time Trump posts under vulgar and nasty tweet, especially one that might trigger a dictator to fire the first salvo of World War III, it’s tempting to demand that Twitter to block Trump’s account.

But Trump’s tweets are inherently newsworthy, not because they are pearls of wisdom, but by virtue of the fact that he’s the president of the United States.

It may not be a pleasant experience to read Trump’s stream of consciousness flatulence, but it gives us a window into his demented and devious mind.

Twitter has no intentions of blocking their most famous subscriber, they issued the flowing statement:

Blocking a world leader from Twitter or removing their controversial Tweets would hide important information people should be able to see and debate. It would also not silence that leader, but it would certainly hamper necessary discussion around their words and actions. 

We shouldn’t expend our energy attempting to convince social media giants to block Trump, we should be exercising every fire of our being attempting to impeach him.

Read More:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-switch/wp/2018/01/05/twitter-explains-why-it-wont-block-world-leaders-without-naming-trump/?utm_term=.98354c3d17a3

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Barack Obama, Not Donald Trump Dominates Twitter’s List of Most Re-Tweeted Posts of 2017

“As 2017 winds down, President Donald Trump continues to make headlines via his active Twitter account on a near-daily basis. But for all his furious posting, the tweeter-in-chief failed to make Twitter`s lists of most-liked and most-retweeted posts of 2017.

So who did take the No. 1 slots? Those prizes, announced Tuesday, went to former President Barack Obama and-interestingly enough-a teenager on a quest for chicken nuggets.

Former President Barack Obama had the most-liked tweet of the year. His post in response to the white nationalist rally in Charlottesville this summer received 4.6 million likes. Another tweet, which he shared after Senator John McCain`s brain cancer diagnosis was made public, received more than 2 million likes, making it the third most-liked of 2017.

Obama was also responsible for three of the ten most-retweeted tweets of the year. The Charlottesville tweet came in at No. 2, with 1.7 million retweets.”

Fortune

When historians and biographers weigh in on the Donald Trump administration, they will pay scant notice to his ghostwritten books, but they will parse every word in his tweets.

Trump is primarily known for two things: Pussy grabbing and firing off tweets. He starts of each morning, not with prayer or meditation, but with a vitriolic tweet.

You`d think the septuagenarian Tweeter-in-Chief would dominate Twitter`s list of most-liked and most-retweeted posts of 2017.

But it`s another president, the erudite and diplomatic Barack Obama who`s well-represented in Twitter`s list of most-retweeted posts of 2017. This is in spite of the fact that Twitter is tailor-made for grammatically-challenged wicked dimwits.

It should be noted that Obama has 97 million Twitter followers to Trump`s 44 million. Obama rarely tweets while Trump tweets almost as often as he farts, proving that quality is better than quantity.

Trump`s incoherent and nasty tweets may get him impeached or trigger World War III, but Obama`s sincere and uplifting tweets are a promise that America will survive the execrable Trump administration.

Read More:

http://fortune.com/2017/12/05/donald-trump-twitter-tweets-most-2017/

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Twitter Employee Deletes Donald Trump’s Twitter Feed on His Last Day of Work

On Thursday President Donald Trump`s Twitter feed went down, unfortunately it was restored 11 minutes later.

A Twitter customer support employee performed the community service on his last day. We all have fantasies about wreaking havoc on our last day of work: Downloading porn on the boss`s laptop, spiking the water cooler, keying the car of the office gossip … But deleting the Twitter feed of the most powerful man in the world, if only for a few minutes, is truly epic.

There is so much tomfoolery, fake news, and just plain meanness that emanates from Trump`s Twitter feed, many of Trump`s supporters and enemies have attempted to curb his addiction to his favorite social media platform.

The as yet unidentified Twitter employee probably committed a crime shutting down Trump`s Twitter account, but I hope he`s not in any serious trouble. Let the man who hasn`t fantasized about shutting up Trump permanently by breaking his baby hands cast the first stone at the Twitter employee.

if I was the CEO of Twitter I would give the patriotic Twitter employee a generous severance package, and the “Employee of the Year” award.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Donald Trump, Twitter and the End of the World

Outrage is the coin of the realm on social media, especially Twitter. Trump has a volcanic nature and his default mode is outrage, therefore Twitter is the perfect platform for him to publish his insane proclamations.

Many presidents have occasionally used the editorial pages of the New York Times or the Washington Post to communicate with the American public. But Trump`s grammar is unfit for a middle school newspaper, let alone a prestigious publication like The New York Times, fortunately there are no grammar rules per se on Twitter, and he can vent to his illiterate heart`s content on the social media site.

I sometimes wax apoplectic on Twitter and nobody bats an eye, because that`s just how people roll on Twitter.

Even though Trump is the President of the United States and Leader of the Free World we shrug when he spouts nonsense on Twitter. Nothing to see her folks, it`s just our Buffoon-in-Chief talking smack on his favorite social media platform.

Trump could tweet that Kim Jong-un the Rocket Man and Crooked Hillary should ride a nuclear-tipped missile shaped like a dildo and crash into a deserted island and we would take it in stride, after all Trump has been twitting crazy shi* for years.

If Trump tweeted “crazy fundies are right and September 23, 2017 is really the end of the world and imma gonna grab me as much pussy as I can before then!,” I would think to myself what kind of a fuc*ed up world do we live in, I always thought the end of the world would be announced by heavenly trumpets, not by a stupid Trump tweet.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes