Mariah Carey Ronda Rousey Death Match!

After Ronda Rousey was upset by Holly Holm in the second round at UFC 193 in November 2015, she confided in Ellen DeGeneres and millions of her viewers that she contemplated suicide.

It took a year for Rousey to regain her composure and confidence to once again enter the octagon, and square off against another foe.

On Friday 30, 2016 Ronda Rousey faced off against Amanda Nunes for the women`s bantamweight title, and it took only 48 seconds for Nunes to reduce Rousey to a bloody pulp.

On December 31, 2016 Mariah Carey suffered the most humiliating incident in her life, and I wouldn`t be surprised if she was contemplating suicide.

Read my articles chronicling Mariah`s epic fail:

http://thesop.org/story/20170101/mariah-careys-horrible-new-years-eve-performance-video.html

http://thesop.org/story/20170102/mariah-careys-epic-new-year-eves-fail-the-aftermath.html

Although few would shed a tear if Mariah Carey or especially if Ronda Rousey killed themselves, I hope and pray that they don`t, or at least not until they engage in epic pay-per-view death match.

Imagine if you will Mariah and Ronda in a vat filled with applesauce, the match doesn`t end until the loser drowns in the applesauce.

Ronda is a beast and under normal circumstances she would kill Mariah in a New York minute, to handicap the match Mr. T would deliver a roundhouse punch to Ronda`s face and give her only a couple of minutes to recover.

America loves a redemption story, and only surviving such a grueling match would return the winner to our good graces.

My money would be on Mariah, her huge butt has major-league buoyancy and it would be difficult, if not impossible, to drown her.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Mariah Carey’s Epic New Year’s Eve Fail: The Aftermath

The reverberations of Mariah Carey`s disastrous New Year`s Eve performance didn`t end at the stroke of midnight, indeed they are just beginning. Let`s just hope that this doesn`t mean that the epic horribleness of 2016 is going to linger into 2017.

Mariah Carey blamed the fiasco on Dick Clark Productions (DCP), claiming that they deliberately sabotaged her performance “so they could get Mariah drama” and boost ratings.

This ridiculous assertion of course begs the questions: What career? The only thing Mariah has going on in 2017 is a reality show “Mariah`s World” on the E network. At this downwards stage of Mariah`s career even this unknown blogger could end her career by writing a negative review.

Mariah`s peeps claimed in a written complaint to DCP that her sound and microphone systems were deliberately sabotaged.

DCP responded almost immediately with this written statement:

As the premier producer of live television events for nearly 50 years, we pride ourselves on our reputation and long-standing relationships with artists. To suggest that dcp, as producer of music shows including the American Music Awards, Billboard Music Awards, New Year`s Rockin` Eve and Academy of Country Music Awards, would ever intentionally compromise the success of any artist is defamatory, outrageous and frankly absurd.

In another statement DCP said that non-technical issues were responsible for the most humiliating moment in the diva`s career.

Hmm, non-technical issues? Too much celebratory drinking before her performance? Pride in thinking that a diva such as herself doesn`t need to practice? Rusty pipes?

I will always love me some Mariah, and I will continue to play her CD`s, but non-technical issues have ruined her as a live performer.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Mariah Carey’s Horrible New Year’s Eve Performance! Career-ending Disaster?

Mariah Carey was the biggest female pop star of the 90`s, she garnered a handful of Grammys, and sold out stadiums, suffice to say that her status as a diva and a legend is set in concrete.

I love Mariah and I will continue to listen to her CD`s until I`m in a nursing home, but I wouldn`t spend a dime to watch her in concert, she`s a hot mess.

From her curvaceous hips to her smoldering lips to her powerful pipes, Mariah will forever be my vision of love.

Mariah was the final pre-midnight act on “Dick Clark`s New Year`s Rockin` Eve with Ryan Seacrest.” The diva had just finished “Auld Lang Syne” when things spiraled out of control.

Let me digress by asking: Why is Ryan Seacrest taking second billing to a man who has been dead for almost five years? In any case Clark is rolling over in his grave in consternation over Mariah`s horrible performance.

Train wreck performance! Lip-syncing meltdown! Epic Fail! Suicide-inducing performance! These words fail to convey the magnitude of Mariah`s breakdown. You must watch the video!

From Trump to ISIS to the unusual number of sports, entertainment, and political icons who died, this has been one of the worst years in American history, Mariah perfectly encapsulated the horror of 2016, let`s hope and pray 2017 will be better.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Robert Paul Reyes: My Death Wish List for 2017

The Grim Reaper was busy in 2016 culling the best and brightest from the realms of entertainment, sports and politics. The death of icons like Muhammad Ali, David Bowie, Carrie Fisher and John Glenn left a deep void in our culture.

The Grim Reaper never takes a holiday, and he will be busy again in 2017 snuffing out the brightest lights, but I hope he will take out these dim bulbs next year:

The Kardashian Sluts

The Kardashian women are indistinguishable from one another. They all have surgically-enhanced body parts, a penchant for dating black rappers and athletes, and a love for the limelight. They have no talent, and are famous for being famous. Let`s hope and pray they achieve immortality be dying together in a plane crash.

Hillary Clinton

Hillary is a decrepit old hag and she should have died years ago, but her pride and stubbornness will fortify her will into her 90`s. I`m keeping my fingers crossed that a killer clown will dispatch her to hell before she mounts yet another presidential campaign.

Nancy Pelosi

Pelosi is older than Methuselah and as wicked as the devil, if she doesn`t die of Botox poisoning in 2017 there is no God.

Oprah Winfrey

If pride comes before a fall, then it`s high time that Oprah falls straight into the fiery pit of hell.

Katie Couric

The only thing that Couric ever had going for her was her perkiness, but age extinguished her perkiness decades ago, she`s past her expiration date.

Mariah Carey

Carey was one of the brightest stars of the 90`s, but nobody has nostalgia for that forgettable decade, and nobody would miss her if the Grim Reaper dragged her to hell.

Lady Gaga

Her final performance act in 2017 should be ritual suicide on stage.

Nicki Minaj

Barbie? Really? Barbie doesn`t have a grotesquely fat butt! Enough said!

Meryl Streep

Enough is enough! I hope the Grim Reaper takes her out before she`s nominated for yet another award.

Feminist

That means any feminist who complains that I included only women on my list.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes