Cat Sashays Down Catwalk

“A cat who wandered onto the runway during a fashion show in Turkey managed to upstage the models themselves.

A video taken at Istanbul`s Esmod International Fashion Show shows the nonchalant feline grooming itself before strutting down the catwalk and playfully lashing out at a model trying to steal its thunder.”

Time

A cat strutting down a catwalk isn`t as strange as it may seem, they are natural born divas and they love the spotlight. I have two cats, and they rarely run from one room to another instead they casually stroll around my house as if they are trying to impress me with their regal walk.

I imagine most of the catcalls at the fashion show in Turkey were for the cute kitty, she was really working it.

The cat tried to scratch another model, typical catty model behavior. I`m just glad it didn`t spark a catfight.

Anyway, enjoy the video:

http://time.com/5440248/runway-cat/

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Crazy Cat Lady Kicked Off Flight After Trying to Smuggle Her Cat for Emotional Support

“A woman who smuggled her cat onto a plane was kicked off of the flight by stunned cabin crew.

The passenger from the US told British Airways flight attendants who caught her with the cat she needed it for `emotional support`.

The cat was in her hand luggage, according to the Daily Record, who was told the cat could have got through security at Glasgow Airport.

The woman almost got away with it – but when staff approached her to put her bag in the overhead locker because she was sitting in an emergency exit – the moggie in a box was spotted.”

Daily Mail

Folks are really abusing the concept of therapy animals, passengers have been booted from flights for having “support animals” ranging from squirrels to snakes to pigs. So don`t even think about claiming that a pig is your emotional support animal, for God`s sake just check in Rosie O`Donnell and let her travel in the baggage compartment.

This woman should have been arrested for animal cruelty, how she dare stuff her poor kitty in her handbag. The traumatized cat could have used an emotional support animal of his own.

I love my cats, but I leave my kitties at home, secure in the knowledge that I can deal with whatever as long as I`m wearing my big girl Garfield panties.

If this woman can`t leave her house without a support animal, she should stay home and play with her cat.

Read More:

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-6310577/American-passenger-kicked-British-Airways-flight-trying-smuggle-CAT-onboard.html

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Morris the Cat Likes to Ride Champy the Horse: Video

This horse had never been ridden before, and this shelter cat had never had any friends – but as soon as they met, the cat jumped on the horses back and started riding him everywhere!

YouTube video description

With all due respect Champy the horse and Morris the cat aren`t friends, felines don`t have friends, they only have servants.

I lavish my cats with toys and pet furniture, buy them gourmet cat food, and clean their litter boxes every day, but I realize cats consider themselves deities, and they regard me as a faithful servant.

Morris climbs on top of Champy simply because cats like high places where they can survey their kingdom. Morris has as much affection for Champy as he does for a tall bookcase.

I must admit they make a cute pair, but they ain`t buddies!

Cats Love Playing Hide and Seek

Cats have a penchant for disappearing and then magically reappearing, unfazed by the havoc they`ve caused.

I have a tiny house and you`d think my 25-pound cat, Tico, would be unable to hide from me for more than a few seconds. But on more than a dozen occasions I`ve torn apart my house looking for the obese feline, and only when I`m exhausted from my search will Tico emerge from God knows where.

I don`t know where my cats disappear when I can`t find them, perhaps they can slide in and out of alternate universes, or maybe the mysterious creatures have the ability of becoming invisible when they want some privacy.

This essay is a warning for new cat owners, if you can`t find your furry critter, hold off on posting a missing cat message on Facebook. Stop looking for the mischievous kitty, plop down on the sofa and watch TV, and I guarantee he will emerge out of the void.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

‘Cat Grandpa’ Goes Viral After Pet Shelter Shares Pics of Him Sleeping With Cats

“Terry Lauerman of De Pere has become an online sensation this week after the pet shelter where he volunteers shared photos showing the 75-year-old – who has since been dubbed The Cat Grandpa – fast asleep while snuggling several of the shelter`s cats.

Safe Haven Pet Sanctuary Inc.`s Facebook post about Lauerman has garnered over 80,000 reactions and 22,000 shares since Tuesday afternoon – and those numbers continue to climb. The post also made its way onto social news sites like Reddit and BuzzFeed, and was covered Thursday by Good Morning America.

We are so lucky to have a human like Terry. Terry just came along one day and introduced himself. He said he`d like to brush cats. Eventually it became everyday. He brushes all of the cats, and can tell you about all of their likes and dislikes. He also accidentally falls asleep most days. We don`t mind – Cats need this! Terry is a wonderful volunteer.”

Green Bay Press Gazette

I wish I could post a video or photograph that would go viral, but I`m not as photogenic as a cute kitten, I don`t have any discernible talents, I don`t possess a grotesquely large butt capable of breaking the Internet, and I`m too lazy to learn a trick that will elicit views.

However I love taking naps with my cats, and maybe if I post a pic of Tico, my 25-pound kitty, plopped on my head as I`m taking a nap, we`ll become Internet sensations.

I`m jealous of The Cat Grandpa, he doesn`t clean the litter boxes or perform any other useful service at the pet shelter, all he does is brush the cats and take naps with them, and suddenly he`s a geriatric pimp.


Move over Cat Grandpa, I`m going to dethrone you as the most lovable cat-loving old codger on the Internet.

Does Your Cat Hate You?

I don`t need to hire a soothsayer or a pet psychologist to determine if my pooch, Mandy loves me. Mandy loves me to death, her love is manifest in her sloppy kisses, wagging of her tail, and the love-struck look in her eyes whenever I`m with her.

Dogs wear their hearts on their sleeves, but you never know where you stand with your feline companions. I love my kitties, Tico and Ebony, but I sometimes wonder if they hate me, and if they`re plotting to kill me. Mind you I`ve had Ebony for 18 years, and Tico for about five years, and I still don`t know if they would miss me if I got run over by a Mack truck.

An expression vaguely resembling love, or at least an absence of hatred, flits across their face, and I rush over to pet them, and they reward me with a hiss or a scratch.

Even though I don`t know if my love is reciprocated, I still adore my cats. I suspect that they really do love me, but have issues expressing their affection.

I am dealing with serious medical issues and I take a nap every day before going to work, and I call Tico, and he always, without fail, snuggles next to my face, and naps with me. If that isn`t love …

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes

Cat Lady Needs to Get a Clue!

“DEAR JOAN: My cat has started waking me up at 4 a.m. every morning to be fed. She won`t take no for an answer. She walks all over me, swats my nose, meows in my ear and knocks things off my dresser if I don`t respond.

If I try locking her out of my room, she scratches at the door and howls. She won`t stop. She once continued with that behavior for two hours until I finally gave up and fed her.

What can be done to stop this? I love my cat, but 4 in the morning, especially on a weekend, is too much.”

G.G., Concord

The Mercury News

Dear Clueless Cat Lady: Get a clue!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a biological imperative to risk getting run over to discover that was on the other side.

Why is your kitty waking you up at an ungodly hour in the morning to be fed? It`s not because she is a diabetic with cravings that must be sated, like all cats she`s a jerk, plain and simple. I love my cats to death, but I accept that jerk-life behavior is as normal as purring and meowing.

What can be done to stop this? Nothing! Absolutely Nothing! A cat is the master of any home, especially a home where the only occupant is a cat lady. A feline expects nothing less than to be catered to at any hour of the day or night.

Your cat literally walks all over you, get used to it, that`s a small price to pay for having a kitty in your home.

Read More:

https://www.mercurynews.com/2018/09/04/why-does-my-cat-wake-me-up-at-4-a-m-demanding-to-be-fed/

Taking Your Kitty to the Vet? Calm Your Cat With a New Feline Radio Station!

“No cat relishes a trip to the vet. Being confined to a cramped carrier and hauled out of the house is a stress-inducing experience for most of our feline friends. But turning on the radio could help. Whiskas recently launched a radio station devoted to playing soothing sounds to keep cats feeling tranquil on the way to the veterinarian, according to Little Black Book.

Cat Calm Radio plays music by David Teie, a composer who writes music targeted at cats` preferences. His songs feature sounds that will be familiar and soothing to cats, like beats similar to the sound of suckling milk, played at the frequencies cats use to communicate with each other. Researchers have found that cats respond better to his cat-specific tunes than to human music.”

Mental Floss

I`ve owned cats all of my adult life, and if there`s anything I`ve learned about feline psychology is that they hate the trip to the vet. A ten-minute trip to the vet feels like an eternity, as soon as you place your kitty in a carrier and place him in your car he turns into Satan`s familiar.

When I drove from Oakland, CA to my new home in Lynchburg, VA I took my cat, Patches with me, but I wouldn`t have survived the trip with my sanity intact, had I not administered a tranquilizing pill to her every day.

If you think you are familiar with your new pussy cat`s vocalizations, just wait until you take him to the vet for the first time, he will unleash a cacophony seemingly emanating from the pit of hell.

You can whisper, “Oh pussy it`s going to be OK” all you want, put it won`t calm the savage beast. He won`t transform back into the purring sweetheart that you love until he`s back home.

Thanks God Whiskas has launched a radio station devoted to playing soothing sounds to keep kitties tranquil on the way to the vet. Music has a calming effect on me, after a bad day at work I will play a Sade CD and by the time I`m home I`ll be cool and calm. I`m sure that cat-specific tunes will have a similar effect on our pets.

Cat Calm Radio was launched to promote “National Take Your Cat to the Vet Day.” Check it out:

http://www.catcalmradio.com/

Read More:
http://mentalfloss.com/article/555298/radio-station-calms-cats-before-vet

Bruno the Fat Cat Who Stands on His Hind Legs When He’s Hungry Adopted

“After worldwide interest Bruno the cat has a new home.

The Russian Blue became an internet sensation after Morton Grove shelter Wright Way announced he was looking for a new family. Cats of his breed usually are supposed to weigh between 7-10 pounds; Bruno tips the scale at 25 pounds.

Bruno likes to stand on his hind legs, usually when he wants food. No one is sure how he learned this special trick, but everyone agrees it`s hilarious.”

ABC News

Bruno is a one-trick pony, he gained Internet fame because he has a penchant for standing up when he wants to be fed.

My kitty, Tico, also tips the scales at 25 pounds, and when he`s hungry he doesn`t stand on his hind legs, he walks on my belly and face until I get the message.

I`m not sure what I would do if Tico stood up on his hind legs, would I call the vet, an exorcist, or would I grab my cell phone and try to monetize the freak by posting videos on YouTube?

I`m glad Bruno found a forever home; I hope his new owner will pamper him.

Read More:

https://abc30.com/pets-animals/bruno-the-fat-cat-adopted-by-chicago-couple/4029291/

AUGUST 2018 ARCHIVES PAGE TWO:

http://robertpaulreyes.com/august-2018-archives-page-2/

Top Ten Ways to Celebrate International Cat Day

Flood the inbox of all of your friends and acquaintances with cat pics.

Respond only with a “meow” or a “purr” all freaking day long.

Act finicky, for example when the cashier at McDonald`s ask you “Do you want fries with that?” answer “Yes, but make sure they are lightly salted, uniform in size, and not too hot.”

Knead your coworker`s belly, and when they stare at you in amazement, say “You`re Welcome” and walk away.

Take a crap in your neighbor`s flower bed.

Take a nap on your coworker`s keyboard.

Wake up your partner by biting her toe.

Walk on your girlfriend when she`s napping on the sofa, and when she screams, “What the hell is wrong with you? reply “I`m hungry bitch, feed me.”

Yell in a crowded restaurant, “Someone Heimlich maneuver my punk ass, I have a hairball stuck in my throat.”

Take a Garfield stuffed animal to work and set up a shrine to Lord Cat in your cubicle.

Follow Robert Paul Reyes on Twitter: http://twitter.com/robertpaulreyes