Archive of Robert Paul Reyes’ 2016 Columns


Kate McKinnon: Too Beautiful, Young and Charming to Play Hillary Clinton, November 11, 2016


The Real Hillary Clinton, November 11, 2016


The Real Huma Abedin, November 11, 2016


Donald Trump Destroyed Clinton and Bush Dynasties, November 12, 2016


Hillary Clinton Has Only Herself to Blame, November 13, 2016


A Beer a Day Keeps the Doctor Away, November 14, 2016


Gay Lovebirds Engage in Epic Fight! Assault With Cup of Top Ramen Noodles, November 15, 2016


Happy National Fast Food Day, November 16, 2016


Can Young Children Shame Donald Trump into Being Kind?, November 17, 2016


Why Hillary Clinton Lost Election, November 18, 2016


Santa Fired for Telling Girl Hillary on Naughty List, November 19, 2016


Golden Pheasant Dead Ringer for Donald Trump, November 20, 2016


Should You Let Your Dog Lick Your Face?, November 20, 2016


Is Obama a Secret Muslim, Michelle Obama a Transsexual and Hillary Clinton a Clone ?, November 20, 2016


Colin Kaepernick Is a Selfish Jerk, November 20, 2016


Cam Newton Is Despised Because He’s Gay, Not Because He’s Black, November 20, 2016


Everything You Ever Wanted to Know About Hillary Clinton, November 20, 2016


Pope Francis Grants Priests the Authority to Absolve Abortions, November 21, 2016


Uber to Employ Hookers as Drivers, November 22, 2016


Brooke Baldwin Loses It When Guest Says Nigger, November 23, 2016


Robert Paul Reyes: What I’m Thankful for This Thanksgiving, November 23, 2016


Hot Chick Shoots Guests Who Overstayed Their Welcome, November 24, 2016


Kanye West is Nuts! Who is Responsible for Driving Him Nuts?, November 25, 2016


America’s Mom Carol Brady Dead at 82, November 26, 2016


Donald Trump Needs to Adopt a Pet to Soften His Image, November 27,2016


America Has Elected a Racist Moron! Get Used to It!, November 27, 2016


Donald Trump’s Hissy Fit Over Unflattering Photos, November 28, 2016


Hillary Clinton’s Post Election No-makeup Face Rocks, November 29, 2016


House Democrats must kick Nancy Pelosi to the Curb, November 29, 2016


Snoop Dog and Hillary Clinton Follow Each Other on Twitter, November 30, 2016


Donald Trump is Right, Ohio State Terrorist Shouldn’t Have Been in America,November 30 2016


Hillary Clinton Must Disappear for the Good of the Democratic Party, December 1, 2016


Pooch Loves Santa, December 1, 2016


Hillary Clinton Doll Dangling From Metal Hook in Store, December 2, 2016


Donald Trump Should Waterboard Hillary Clinton, December 3, 2016


Oregon School District Bans Santa, December 3, 2016


Bill Maher on Donald Trump, December 4, 2016


Cam Newton Benched for Dress Code Violation, December 5, 2016

Donald Trump Selects Ben Carson as Secretary of Housing and Urban Development, December 6, 2016

Lena Dunham’s Disgusting Toilet Selfie, December 7, 2016

Woman Driver Runs Over Ex-boyfriend’s Christmas Display, December 7, 2016

Hillary Clinton Praises Harry Reid, December 9, 2016

Is a KFC-scented candle romantic?, December 10, 2016

Amateur Mechanic Modifies Toy Car to Reach Speed of 40 mph, December 11, 2016

Pastor from Hell Heckles Kids at Mall: There is no Santa!, December 12, 2016

It’s not “He and She”, It’s “Ze” WTF?, December 13, 2016

Police Allow Police Dog to Bite Naked Unarmed Man, December 14, 2016

Automated Restaurant Opens in New York City, December 15, 2016

Donald Trump Meets Kanye West, Hillary Clinton Meets Fat Joe, December 16, 2016

Donald Trump Should Appoint Sylvester Stallone to Chair NEA, December 17, 2016

Hipster Nativity Scene Depicts Birth of Jesus in 2016, December 18, 2016

Top Ten Fake News Stories of 2016, December 19, 2016

Cops Break into Car to Rescue Mannequin That Looked too Real, December 19, 2016

Autopsy of Hillary Clinton’s Campaign, December 20, 2016

Elephant Farts on Friend’s Face, December 21, 2016

Chinese Truck Driver Covers Truck With His Own Poetry, December 22, 2016

My New Year’s Resolutions, December 23, 2016

Huma Abedin and Hillary Clinton: Lovers Together Again, December 23, 2016

Putin a Statesman and Patriot, Obama a Feckless Hack, December 24, 2016

Kilt-wearing Santa From Hell Rides a Unicycle, December 24, 2016

The Naked Truth About Donald Trump, December 25, 2016

Deconstructing Donald Trump’s Christmas Tweet, December 26, 2016

Seal Terrorizes Australian Town on Christmas, December 26, 2016

Outrage Donald Trump Receives Standing Ovation at a Christian Church, December 26, 2016

Joe Biden: Hillary Lost Because She Had No Vision, December 27, 2016

What Would a 3rd Obama Term Look Like, December 28, 2016

John Kerry’s Forked Tongue, December 29, 2016

Court: Cops Can Shoot a Dog if it Moves or Barks, December 30, 2016

My Death Wish List for 2017, December 30, 2016