Putin: Statesman and Patriot! Obama: Feckless Hack

“That was how Putin answered a question Friday at his nationally televised annual news conference about whether Russia interfered in the U.S. presidential election in favor of Donald Trump.

The Democrats are losing on all fronts and looking elsewhere for things to blame, he told the nearly 1,400 journalists packed into a Moscow convention hall for the nearly four-hour event. `In my view, this, how shall I say it, degrades their own dignity. You have to know how to lose with dignity.`

The Kremlin leader – who also sent an upbeat letter to Trump last week that the president-elect revealed Friday – pointed out that Republicans had won the House and Senate, as well.

`Did we do that, too?` he asked with a slight grin.”

The Washington Post

The Russian Federation is a diminished superpower, but its nuclear arsenal demands that we take their pronouncements seriously.

The Russian President, Vladi­mir Putin, is a statesman and a patriot who is loved and admired in his own country, and respected and feared throughout the world.

Better a dictator who always has the best interests of his country at heart, than a democratically-elected president who panders to tyrants and doesn`t believe in American Exceptionalism.

When Putin speaks – people listen, and freedom-loving patriots in America listened with glee when the head of the Russian oligarchy lectured American Democrats on the finer points of democracy. Feckless Obama and mirthless Hillary and the rest of the Democrats need to learn how to lose with dignity and humility.

Enough is enough! No more excuses! Hillary didn`t lose because of Putin, WikiLeaks or the FBI director; she lost because she`s a corrupt witch who is despised by the electorate.

As someone who has a fine-tuned sense of the absurd, I have enjoyed watching Putin toy with the effete and ineffectual Obama, but as a patriot it makes my blood boil that we elected a sniveling African to the White House.

Even a clueless clown like Donald Trump on his worst day will do a better job than Obama on his best day.

If we would only change the constitution to allow Putin to run for President of the United States.

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Hillary Clinton and Huma Abedin: Lovers Together Again!

“Hillary Clinton and top aide Huma Abedin were pictured together on Thursday for the first time since losing the presidential election.

The pair chatted and Abedin smiled as they walked out of Clinton`s office in the Midtown neighborhood of New York City.

They had spent five hours inside the office before Abedin and an unidentified woman walked Clinton to a waiting vehicle and sent her on her way with a box of documents.” Daily Mail

Hillary Clinton and Huma Abedin emerged from their five hour “conference” with lipstick smeared, hair disheveled and clothing ruffled. Not really, Hillary is more discrete than her philandering spouse, she has managed to indulge in countless lesbian affairs without sparking controversy or outrage.

I`m not an expert on lesbian love talk, but I imagine that Hillary`s first words to Huma were: I wish I knew how to quit you! Since Hillary`s humiliating defeat she has kept her distance from her longtime aide/lover, it`s not surprising that their first meeting in weeks lasting five hours.

It appears that Hillary has forgiven Huma for not safeguarding her emails from her pedophile husband. Hillary will never again be a viable presidential candidate, she might as well come out of the closet, and publicly declare her undying love for Huma.

In a perfect world Hillary would embrace her lesbian identity and devote the rest of her life, with Huma by her side, advocating for gay and lesbian rights. But in the real world, the old hag will pretend she`s heterosexual until the Grim Reaper drags her to hell.


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Robert Paul Reyes: My New Year’s Resolutions

Renew my determination to abide by my minimalist credo: Less things, less entanglements.

Pay it forward when I’m the recipient of an unexpected blessing. 

Make a determined effort to love people as much as I love animals. 

Don’t sweat the small stuff, and remember it’s all small stuff. 

Volunteer !

Have a tough skin, and a gentle touch.


Appreciate the simple pleasures like my daily nap with my cat Tico, and my daily walk with my pooch Mandy.

When a song on the radio takes me back to a simpler and happier time in my life, don’t hesitate to lose myself in the moment. 

Write something, anything, every day!


Chinese Truck Driver Covers His Vehicle With His Own Poetry

“A Chinese truck driver classed out his work vehicle by covering it in a high-brow form of decoration — poetry.

A video filmed earlier this month in Chengdu, Sichuan Province, shows the unique way a driver named He Xianwei decorated his work truck.
The driver said the words written all over his truck are 30 poems that he composed while driving.

He said he frequently writes and recites poems and song lyrics while driving, so he decided to publicize his work in the hopes of drawing attention to his writings.”


Great poetry is as rare as a pearl in a cesspool, and the greatest poets find it almost impossible to publish their poetry — there is simply no market for poetry.

But everybody and his autistic mother imagines himself to be a great poet, and there are a gazillion and one self-published poetry books available on Amazon.

The Internet is infested with bad poetry, in fact there is almost as much bad poetry as their is disturbing porn online.

I`m cognizant that it`s almost impossible to browse the Internet for more than an hour without stumbling onto somebody`s poetry Web site, but I always imagined the highways to be a poetry-free zone.

But in China there`s a trucker/poet who has covered his truck with his own poetry. I give all Chinese drivers a wide berth, but I would move to Canada if a Chinese/American in my hometown decided to cover his truck with poetry.

Why is every poet on a mission from God to share his poetry with the world? If you imagine yourself to be a poet, do humankind a favor and instead of posting your poetry online or covering your vehicle with your poetry, self-publish your poetry and sell it online, that way the only ones exposed to your atrocious rhymes will be you and your autistic mother.

Pic of wanker`s truck covered in poems


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Elephant Farts on Friend’s Face: Video

“An elephant at a sanctuary in Thailand took revenge on a pushy comrade by planting her rear-end in the other pachyderm`s face and letting loose a huge fart.

A video posted to YouTube by Elephant News shows Faa Mai, an elephant at the Elephant Nature Park sanctuary in Kuet Chang, climbing on a small hill that was previously claimed by a fellow elephant named Kabu.”

King of the Hill is a children`s game, the object of which is to stay on top of a large hill or pile (or any other designated area) as the `King of the Hill`. Other players attempt to knock the current King off the pile and take their place, thus becoming the new King of the Hill.


“King of the Hill” was my favorite childhood game, I would spend my entire recess playing this game with my friends. I was a puny little kid and I rarely made it to the summit, but when I did my friends let me enjoy the view from the top for a few moments before unceremoniously knocking me down.

In the pachyderm world this innocent children`s game takes a sinister turn as demonstrated by Faa Mai the elephant. The flatulent elephant attempted to secure her perch on top of the hill by letting loose a tremendous fart on the face of a pushy comrade.

Faa Mai`s smelly tactic may have worked, but everybody knows elephants have long memories, and proving that revenge is a dish best served cold Faa Mai may one day discover elephant dung on her meal dish.

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Photo Credit: Wikipedia


Autopsy of Hillary Clinton’s Campaign by Robert Paul Reyes

In her 2016 presidential campaign Hillary Clinton surrounded herself with sycophants, big donors, and campaign aides who had stood by her for decades.

When you`re surrounded by enablers who tell you that your feces smells like perfume, your screeching voice sounds like a tape of ambient sounds calculated to lull listeners to sleep, and your seizures are an endearing physical trait, of course you`re going to think you`re invincible.

If the electorate were compromised primarily of feminists, lesbians, and establishment Democrats Hillary would have won in a landslide.

It`s impossible to exaggerate what an overwhelming favorite Hillary was both in her primary fight against Senator Bernie Sanders and in the general election clash against Donald Trump. Hillary was the most formidable non-incumbent front-runner for the White House in modern political history.

Hillary`s hubris led her to underestimate Sander`s appeal from the get-go, and she didn`t take him seriously until he started to win one contest after another. It was only because the Democratic primary system was rigged against Sanders, that she was able to finally prevail against the cranky Socialist Jewish septuagenarian.

A primary that was expected to be a coronation turned into a bruising marathon — exposing the lack of enthusiasm for Hillary, particularly among Millennials, African Americans and Latinos.

Hillary didn`t learn any lessons from her epic battle with Sanders, her pride was intact, and she felt she didn`t need to come up with a comprehensive strategy to defeat Donald Trump. Her campaign message was basically: Donald Trump is a racist clown, and I`m an enlightened progressive with a vagina.

Hilary has blamed FBI director James Comey, Putin, and the leaked Podesta emails for her humiliating loss. But Hillary lost to a billionaire buffoon because she was a weak candidate with a weak message and a weak political strategy of ignoring the blue states of Wisconsin, Michigan and Pennsylvania.

The 2016 presidential election doesn`t mean that America embraced the racism and pessimism of Donald Trump, so much as it signifies that we rejected the corruption, pride and status quo inertia of Hillary Clinton.

Trump wasn`t the best candidate we have seen, but arguably Hillary was the worst candidate in modern political history.

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Cops Break into Car to Rescue Mannequin That Looked Too Real

“The report to police was deadly serious — an elderly woman apparently frozen to death inside a parked car in Hudson, New York.

Police in the city said they responded to the call Friday morning with an emergency rescue crew. It was cold — around five degrees Fahrenheit — and the car had snow cover and looked like it hadn`t been moved in a while.
Authorities saw an elderly woman in the front passenger seat, police said. She was wearing an oxygen mask. She did not move and was unresponsive.

An officer smashed the rear window, opened the door…and discovered the woman was really a life sized mannequin. The kind that is used in CPR training.”


If a Good Samaritan saw a frozen pooch inside a parked vehicle, he wouldn`t hesitate to smash the window to rescue the poor creature. We are a nation of animal lovers, and we hate to see cats or dogs in distress.

However if you saw an elderly woman who looked like a human popsicle inside a parked car, would you smash the window to rescue her?

A blue-haired old lady isn`t quite as cute and cuddly as a kitten or a puppy, and many people would have moral reservations about interfering with the handiwork of the Grim Reaper.

Kudos to the citizen who called 911, and to the cops who smashed the car window in an attempt to save what they thought was a freezing elderly citizen.

The owner was furious at the police officers for damaging his vehicle, but the rest of us should be happy that in this cold world someone still cares about an old lady freezing to death.


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Top Ten Fake News Stories of 2016

Donald Trump Has No Path to Victory

Trump bulldozed a path to victory over Hillary, the mainstream media, billionaire donors, pundits, academia and and the Republican and Democratic establishment.

Obama Was Born in Hawaii

When one of the original birthers, Donald Trump, conceded in September 2016 that Barack Hussein Obama was born in Hawaii, the media immediately proclaimed that the birther movement was dead.The reports of the death of the birther movement are greatly exaggerated. I will not accept that Obama was born in Hawaii until he submits his original birth certificate to document experts for examination.

War on Christmas

There is no organized war on Christmas: The media and corporations embrace and exploit Christmas, nothing drives up ratings and moves products more than jumping on the Christmas bandwagon. Christmas may be dead in secular Europe, but in Christian-dominated America businesses will do anything to pander to Christmas-loving Americans. War on Christmas? Bullcrap! I have Christmas up the wazoo!

Climate Change is Settled Science

There is a special place in hell reserved for Al Gore, Obama and every other peddler of this damn hoax. It`s poetic justice that Gore will experience global warming in hell throughout eternity.

CNN Is Unbiased

The conventional wisdom is that Fox News is conservative, MSNBC leans left and CNN is middle of the road. While it`s true that Fox panders to conservatives, and MSNBC veers sharply to the left, it`s bull that CNN is unbiased. During the presidential campaign CNN was on a mission from God to destroy, defame and ridicule Trump, while their sympathetic and fawning coverage of Hillary made me want to throw up.

Bruce Jenner is a Beautiful Woman

Until Jenner has sex reassignment surgery he`s a man, in the meantime he looks like a grotesque parody of a woman. It`s bad enough that the media wants to brainwash us into accepting that he`s a woman, but they want us to proclaim that he`s a beautiful woman. Screw political correctness and screw Bruce Jenner! The emperor has no clothes, and everyone can see that he has a dick.

Lena Dunham is a Beautiful Woman

Dunham has made a career out of exposing her naked butt on “Girls” ostensibly to promote body acceptance, the truth is that Lena is repulsive, inside and outside, and she`s nothing but a crude exhibitionist.

Islam is a Religion of Peace

There is no hope for anyone who swallows this lie, and I won`t waste any words trying to convince them otherwise.

The Supporters of Donald Trump are Racist

Every major political candidate attracts a fringe element, there are just as many racists who hate white people who supported Obama as there are racists who hate black people who supported Trump.

Pop Music is Dead

Pop music may be on life support, but as long as Adele is still performing and recording albums pop music is still alive.

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Hipster Nativity Scene Depicts Birth of Jesus Christ in 2016

“A pair of brothers crafted a Hipster Nativity set, depicting a modern version of the birth of Jesus in the manger.

The $130 Nativity set brings the biblical Christmas scene into the 21st century as Joseph and Mary take selfies with the newborn Jesus in a stable with a solar-powered roof, the Three Wisemen on segways bearing packages from Amazon and the shepherd looking at his cell phone.”


The Nativity scene certainly needed to be updated for the 2st century, but why did the brothers include an invention (Segway) that was introduced in 2001 with much fanfare as the replacement for the automobile, but turned out to be a huge sales disappointment?

And why on Earth are there barnyard animals in the updated Nativity set? It`s the 21st century dammit, and cats rule online and in real life. There should be a cat cuddling next to the Baby Jesus.

Speaking of the Baby Jesus, he should be an orange-faced replica of Baby Trump. I`m sorry if I offended anybody`s religious sensibilities, but Trump as Baby Jesus makes as much sense as Trump as Leader of the Free World.

It would have been a nice touch if Baby Jesus had been depicted wearing a “Black Lives Matter” onesie.

All in all a nice job by the brothers, and the hefty price tag is very much 21st century.

Pic of Nativity scene:


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Donald Trump Should Appoint Sylvester Stallone to Chair NEA

“Is Sylvester Stallone getting political? Rumors surfaced yesterday that Stallone is being eyed to join Donald Trump`s administration with a high post in the National Endowment for the Arts after a report surfaced in London`s Daily Mail. Sources said that Stallone has indeed been offered, and is mulling it.He is coming off an Oscar nomination for Creed, reprising his signature role of Rocky Balboa, 40 years after getting his first Oscar nom in the Best Picture-winning Rocky. It seems as much a long-shot as Rocky`s ring fortunes, but his former action rival Arnold Schwarzenegger did become California State governor.”


Hollywood is a bastion of liberal orthodoxy, and there`s an endless supply of politically-correct entertainment figures that a Democratic president could choose to chair the National Endowment for the Arts (NEA).

Leave it to Trump to consider the conservative Rambo to lead the NEA. I`m neither a Republican or a conservative, but I think Stallone would be an excellent choice.

I`d rather guzzle beer and munch on popcorn watching a Stallone flick than nibble on cheese and sip wine pretending to enjoy a Meryl Streep movie.

We need a common sense individual, regardless of his political ideology, to head the NEA. I doubt that Stallone would approve of funding an artist who thinks immersing figures representing Jesus Christ and Ronald Reagan in a jar of urine is high art.

Sylvester Stallone is a gifted actor, filmmaker and screenwriter who produces art for the masses, and he has earned the right to be considered to chair the National Endowment for the Arts.

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